fatherhood

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Dear Holly: You’re Missing Your Brother This Week While He’s in Alabama

2 years, 1 months.

Dear Holly,

With your brother finishing 1st grade last week, Mommy and I decided it would be a nice change of pace for him to spend this week at Nonna and Papa’s house. It’s only been a few days now, but you’ve made it very clear you miss him.

You ask me each morning, “Where’s Jackie?”

However, it didn’t take long for you to jump up in his bed and play with his toys in his room. It was your way of not only showing you were thinking about him, but that you might as well take advantage of the situation if wasn’t there to stop you.

For me, it’s a strange concept to just have one child in our house this week.

It’s a glimpse of what life could have been like had you been born first, instead of your brother. In particular, it reminds me that your brother had 5 and a half years as an only child, before you were born.

This week serves as one of the few times in your life where you’ve known what it was like to be an only child. You’re used to being the younger, baby sister. That’s how your brother sees you and treats you; so to a large degree, you adopt that title as your identity.

Granted, the two of you will always be in different stages of childhood; so you’re never really having to compete in the same way that siblings who are closer in age might experience.

In a way, both you and your brother get to be an “only child” to some degree.

In just a few days though, you’ll be reunited with Jackie. I can see you don’t quite feel complete without him. I imagine it’s difficult to feel like a little baby sister when your older brother isn’t right there next to you.

Love,

Daddy

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Dear Holly: Now I Finally Believe That Little Girls Really Do Instinctively Love Tea Parties

2 years.

Dear Holly,

Until now, I always thought the idea of little girls wanting to play “tea party” was just a concept invented by toy marketers to sell more product. And for all I know, perhaps it is. But if so, hey… it works!

Because for your 2nd birthday last month, our good friends Lena and Mohamad got you a tea set, and not only did you immediately want to play with it, but you instinctively knew what to do with it!

In fact, having our tea parties together has become a bit of a ritual. Your tea party set is getting a lot of use!

I will say though, for me, you change it from tea to coffee. That’s because for the past 6 months, with me working from home, you have observed me making my organic instant coffee twice a day.

Whenever you think it’s getting near the right time of the day for it, you always ask, “Daddy, coffee?”

My favorite story so far with this tea set was a few weeks ago when I was finishing up cleaning the bathroom upstairs, as part of my weekend routine. I had been up there for a solid 15 minutes.

Then you stood at the bottom of the stairs, and announced to me, “Daddy, coffee!”

Mommy helped explain that you had just made coffee downstairs for me and you wanted me to come down and take a break.

So I gladly did.

It was one of those precious moments that I just wasn’t expecting.

In your mind, you thought, “Daddy’s been up there a while. I bet he’d like some coffee right about now. I’ll go ahead and make him some…”

You are such a sweet little girl. How can I not be completely in love with my little sweetie?

Love,

Daddy

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Dear Holly: I Have Sort of Convinced You That a Rat Puppet is Actually Your Class Pet Dwarf Gerbil from Your School

2 years.

Dear Holly,

For the past couple of months now in your preschool class, you and your friends have enjoyed the presence of Gus Gus, a dwarf gerbil.

Each morning when I take you into the classroom, our immediate routine is to for me to lift you up to the cage so you can ask, “Gus Gus?”

That translates as, “Are you awake yet, Gus Gus?”

The answer is usually, “Well, now I am!” as we watch the wood chips move around and see two beady eyes looking back at us.

One morning we even walked in to see a clear blue plastic roll right across the floor as we opened the door, as Gus Gus raced to the other side of the room as part of his early morning exercise.

Gus Gus finds his way into daily conversations, too. I use him as an interesting subject to help you formulate sentences.

For example, anytime you see a pick-up truck now, you point, and proudly shout, “Truck? Truck! Truck!”

So from there, I started saying, “Gus Gus drives a truck?”

You obviously liked the concept, then decided to repeat that ridiculous thought.

Now anytime you see a pick-up truck, you know what to say to me:

“Truck! Truck! Gus Gus drive truck.”

It finally occurred to me as we were playing with your toys in the living room, to bring life to the rat puppet which I originally got right before you were born, as I was planning on it being a character in your brother’s superhero series on YouTube.

You were amazed to learn was Gus Gus secretly living in our house the whole time, but also that he could talk, and even say your name.

And even when you realized that you yourself could stick your hand into Gus Gus and control his mouth, you still were every bit excited to announce, “It’s Gus Gus!”

Love,

Daddy

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Dear Jack: Exploring Your Great-Uncle Johnny’s Car Collection During Spring Break

7 years, 5 months.

Dear Jack,

It was just about a month ago that you had a pretty cool Spring Break. On the way back from Ruby Falls in the Mazda CX-5, we actually had to drive right past my Uncle Johnny’s house near Chattanooga; which is also near Rock City, where our family would visit a couple of days later. So I let him know in advance, and he was ready for us when we stopped by.

He has the largest collection of classic cars compared to anyone else I personally know. I figured especially at your age now, getting to see his car collection would really be an awesome thing to do.

You obviously were amazed with each car Uncle Johnny proceeded to show you; which included several class Mustangs.

But I think your favorite of them all was his 1993 Ford 150 pick-up truck.

But our visit didn’t just consist of a car museum collection alone.

Uncle Johnny was thoughtful enough, and brave enough, to insist that you drive us around in his golf utility vehicle. Granted, I sat next to you and overtook the wheel and brake pedal for much of the chaotic drive, which included us missing a tree by a few inches.

That’s why I took you to my Uncle Johnny’s house, though.

I knew it would create a memorable experience for you at this age. I have to believe that years from now, you’ll say to me, “Daddy, was that a dream that time we were at that guy’s house and he had all these cars and trucks and then he even let me drive this little car across a field, to another garage where there was this truck I got to stand in?”

Then I can say, “No, that was real.” Here are the pictures to prove it.

Love,

Daddy

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Dear Jack: Your Amazingly Accurate Family Portrait That You Drew for Fun at School, That Almost Got Thrown Out

7 years, 5 months.

Dear Jack,

This past weekend as Mommy was cleaning out your back pack from school, in an effort to throw out anything you didn’t need in there anymore, she found a hidden treasure, asking, “Ah Jack, what’s this?”

It was immediately obvious that you had done an amazingly accurate job of drawing and coloring a picture of your family.

The details were all there.

You and you sister have blue eyes, while your parents have brown. You mixed yellow and brown for your hair color, which is a sandy brown; unlike your sister’s blonde hair and your parents’ brown hair.

I had to laugh, because I now realize you purposely drew me wearing hat, as you’ve made it clear in a subtle way thought you don’t like my current look of choosing a zero guard buzz cut. (With a gentle nudge from Mommy this week, though, it has been decided I’ll be growing my hair back out now.)

In your drawing, Mommy’s lips were colored in full, as compared to the rest of us: I’ve never seen her when she’s not wearing lipstick.

You even took great measure to get our wardrobes right. Clearly, you put a lot of thought into this picture.

What makes me proudest about your drawing is that you chose to do this on your own, at school. It was not part of an assignment.

You just took it upon yourself to draw your family, with great personal details according to each family member.

And we’re all happy in the picture; which is a reflection of how you see us.

I’m looking at the psychological reason you drew this picture. This was your way of expressing that you love your family.

The thing is, there was no guarantee we were even going to see it.

In fact, it almost got thrown away, as it was casually mixed in with a bunch of old graded homework.

You didn’t draw this picture to impress me.

But boy, you managed to anyway.

Love,

Daddy