Why I’m Fine (and Possibly Proud?) to Have Gray in My Beard

Having turned 35 years-old back in April, I needed to briefly confront an internal issue by asking myself a question: Will I eventually start dying my gray hairs as I get older?

I immediately thought of the 2001 Tom Cruise movie, Vanilla Sky, where his chWhy I’m Fine (and Possibly Proud?) to Have Gray in My Beardaracter is seen plucking a few gray hairs while standing in front of the bathroom mirror, on his 35th birthday. Similarly, I pluck a couple gray hairs each week and therefore easily maintain my dark brown hair.

But a month ago, when my daughter was born, I accidentally and by default ended up growing what I call a postpartum beard; out of lack of time or inspiration to shave in the midst of caring for an infant.

It became clear that I now contain more gray hairs in my beard than I am willing to count. Back in my late 20s, those same hairs had turned red, and then blonde… now they are undeniably gray.

The longer my postpartum beard has grown, the less I care about those gray hairs that stick straight out. So then I asked myself, “Why don’t I care?”

Here’s my answer:

Gray hair is seen as a trait that makes a man appear to be “distinguished”. I am now at a point in my life where I see distinguished as a positive trait.

That’s because I feel like I’ve earned it. The gray in my beard holds a story. It indicates that I have life experience and maturity that I never did have up until now.

At age 35, I am settled. I am comfortable and confident in my lifestyle.

I have been married for nearly 8 years. Together, my wife and I have gotten out of debt and built our savings. We’ve raised a 5 and a half year old-son and now have a 1 month-old daughter. As if I needed to explain that raising children makes you a different person…

At my office, I now have many people who look to me for answers and wisdom. And I instantly have the answers. Naturally, the newer 25 year-old office workers call me sir when they meet me; they recognize my confidence and life experience simply how I carry myself; which is what I will self-identify as calm-assertive.

I like this. I like being 35. It sure beats 20 or 25 or 30.

Back when I had no gray hairs, I didn’t have that confidence, nor or the emotional intelligence I now have. So I won’t complain about gray hairs.

With that being said, after I press “publish” on this blog post, I’m going directly downstairs to shave off this beard; not because I am internally inspired to do so, but because my wife wants me to.

But even without my gray hairs after this, my wisdom will still show in the fact I cared more about making my wife happy they continuing to grow a novelty beard.

This is 35.

Dear Jack: Strep Throat on Memorial Day Weekend 2016

5 years, 6 months.

Dear Jack: Strep Throat on Memorial Day Weekend 2016

Dear Jack,

The trend last week among kids in pre-school in the Nashville area was to catch Strep Throat for the first time. Your best friend Libby caught it, then you did the next day. Fortunately, your high fever of 104 signaled Mommy to take you to the doctor before the sore throat symptom ever kicked in.

Afterwards, I picked up your prescription from Publix, which was actually completely free; must be some kind of deal that Publix has worked out with the state of Tennessee.

Had the Strep Throat really gotten a good hold on you, we wouldn’t have been able to travel to Nonna and Papa’s house in Alabama for Memorial Day weekend. You really didn’t know any signs of being sick the whole time.

Dear Jack: Strep Throat on Memorial Day Weekend 2016v

Mommy made sure though, that your water bottles were especially labelled. Even then, I still accidentally ended up drinking of it. Hopefully, my vegan immune system will be strong enough to fight off the germs before they ever do any damage.

Nonna had recently bought a Cozy Coupe car, second hand. You loved driving it around the house, making an obstacle course of furniture and human beings.

Dear Jack: Strep Throat on Memorial Day Weekend 2016

While I took a 90 minute nap on Saturday, you played outside with Nonna and Poppa. Based on the pictures Mommy took, it looks like there was a water house, barrel, and sidewalk chalk involved, which temporarily stayed your face a charcoal color.

Dear Jack: Strep Throat on Memorial Day Weekend 2016

Afterwards, you cooled off by coming inside and baked “crispy poop”, which was obviously your own idea. You mixed up cocoa powder and other various ingredients in a bowl and then Nonna baked it in the oven for you.

Dear Jack: Strep Throat on Memorial Day Weekend 2016

To my surprise, you actually ate some of it… and liked it!

You also really enjoyed playing hide-and-seek with your cousin Calla. We celebrated her 5th birthday a few weeks early.

Despite having Strep Throat, you had a great time anyway. Good thing we got the medicine so early!

Love,

Daddy

Dear Jack: Strep Throat on Memorial Day Weekend 2016

Dear Holly: You Met Your Alabama Cousins on Memorial Day Weekend 2016

5 weeks.

Dear Holly: You Met Your Alabama Cousins on Memorial Day Weekend 2016

Dear Holly,

Whereas a few weeks ago you met your Pennsylvania cousins when they drove down to Tennessee, this past weekend we drove to Alabama to meet your only cousins on my side of the family.

Not only did you meet your cousins Darla (who is 6 months old) and Calla (who is turning 5 years old in a few weeks, so we celebrated her birthday while we were all together), but you also met your Uncle Andrew and Aunt Dana (my sister), as well as your Great Uncle Al and Great Aunt Sharon.

Dear Holly: You Met Your Alabama Cousins on Memorial Day Weekend 2016

It just so happened that you and Darla happened to own and be wearing the same “Super Awesome” shirt.

Nonna and Aunt Dana both commented you act like a little kitten. I had never thought about that before, but I totally see it now.

One of my favorite pictures I took from the trip was when I was packing up our bags in the hatchback of my Honda Element and saw Papa saying goodbye to your brother Jack. It appeared Papa was kissing Jack on the forehead, meanwhile you witnessed the event in wonder.

h4

I love the look on your face, as a month-old baby, as you tried to figure out what was going on in the seat next to you.

At this point in your life, you’re still probably trying to distinguish who any person is beyond Mommy, me, and Jack.

Because right now your life pretty much revolves around your immediate needs being met, that’s about the extent of your understanding of love.

As you get older, you will be able to understand how much your family loves you, beyond just feeding you, changing your diapers, and helping you get to sleep.

Seriously, that look on your face is very special to me. It’s you looking at your future; the ability to truly understand love beyond dirty diapers and formula in a bottle.

Love,

Daddy

Dear Holly: You Met Your Alabama Cousins on Memorial Day Weekend 2016

No, I am Not Joel from The Last of Us

No, I am Not Joel from The Last of Us

Imagine this:

In addition to Family Friendly Daddy Blog, I have another following on my YouTube channel, where I do a weekly series for young men (age 15 to 22-ish) that focuses on masculinity. Therefore, about 80% of my YouTube subscribers are male. However, my readership of this blog is about 80% female.

Here’s the breakdown: I am better at creating videos for a male audience and I am better at creating blog content for a female audience.

That means most of my YouTube subscribers have never read any of my blog posts and most of my blog readers have never watched any of my videos on YouTube.

Today is one of the rare exceptions in which I tie the two together.

As I’m currently growing out my “postpartum beard”, I received a comment a one of my YouTube videos this week: “With the beard you look kinda like Joel from The Last of Us”.

I had no idea who that was- I figured it might be some new sitcom on CBS or something. Thanks to a quick Google search, I learned that Joel is the main character of a 2013 video game called The Last of Us, in which he must escort a young girl named Ellie across a post-apocalyptic United States.

Based on the fact he appears to be a rugged, masculine hero, I obviously take that comparison as a compliment.

Last week I was genuinely mistaken for Tai Lopez. Now today, I’m told I look like a video game character.

I think it’s fun to make these comparisons public. By default, I may create a new series here on my blog, based on when people tell me I look like someone else.

By the time I shave my postpartum beard in a couple weeks, I’m sure I will easily look like someone else I’ve never heard of, as was the case with Tai Lopez and Joel from The Last of Us.

No, I am Not Joel from The Last of Us

We Bought a 2013 Hyundai Elantra from Hyundai of Cool Springs (A WAY-FM Business Impact Partner)

This is NOT a sponsored post. This is simply a passionate testimonial based on our family’s experience. Neither Hyundai of Cool Springs nor WAY-FM were aware of this post until after the purchase of the vehicle.

We Bought a 2013 Hyundai Elantra from Hyundai of Cool Springs (A Business Impact Partner of WAY-FM) during Memorial Day Weekend

Our family now has a “new to us” family vehicle and we are all 4 very excited about it! This past Memorial Day weekend, we traded in our 2006 Honda Accord for a 2013 Hyundai Elantra.

We Bought a 2013 Hyundai Elantra from Hyundai of Cool Springs (A Business Impact Partner of WAY-FM) during Memorial Day Weekend

Everyday for a couple years now, I have been hearing commercials for Hyundai of Cool Springs on my favorite radio station, WAY-FM (both of which happen to be right around the corner from my office).

By default, my wife and I have been Honda people for as long as we’ve been married; nearly 8 years now. So while I was hearing about the Hyundai brand on a daily basis, I was already set on replacing my wife’s Honda Accord for a Honda Fit.

However, in addition to the radio ads I kept hearing on WAY-FM as part of the Business Impact Partnership, something else magical happened that lead to my conversion from Honda to Hyundai…

We Bought a 2013 Hyundai Elantra from Hyundai of Cool Springs (A Business Impact Partner of WAY-FM) during Memorial Day Weekend

A couple of months ago while getting both of our Hondas maintenanced, I candidly asked my mechanic of several years now (at Firestone Complete Auto Care in Cool Springs) a question that only he could legitimately answer as a non-biased 3rd party expert on the subject:

“What is the best car company as far as dependability, maintenance, and value?”

This was his immediate answer:

“If you were asking me this question 3 years ago, I would have said Honda. But now, Hyundai has really stepped up their game. The next time I get a new car, I would like to get a Hyundai for myself. Plus, Hyundais are actually more affordable than Hondas these days.”

We Bought a 2013 Hyundai Elantra from Hyundai of Cool Springs (A Business Impact Partner of WAY-FM) during Memorial Day Weekend

I value his opinion very highly, as he knows exactly which cars have the most (and least) trouble. That was a major turning point for me.

Not to mention, back in 2014 while our family was having our house built, there were 4 occasions where we got to review Hyundais for a week at a time, here on my blog. We drove the Hyundai Sonata, the Azera, and the Sante Fe twice; first in May, then again in December. (To read those posts, just click on the bold red title above the “flashback” pictures.)

Hyundai Santa Fe in May 2014

We Bought a 2013 Hyundai Elantra from Hyundai of Cool Springs (A Business Impact Partner of WAY-FM) during Memorial Day Weekend

Hyundai Azera in May 2014

We Bought a 2013 Hyundai Elantra from Hyundai of Cool Springs (A Business Impact Partner of WAY-FM) during Memorial Day Weekend

2015 Hyundai Sonata in December 2014

We Bought a 2013 Hyundai Elantra from Hyundai of Cool Springs (A Business Impact Partner of WAY-FM) during Memorial Day Weekend

2014 Hyundai Santa Fe again in December 2014

We Bought a 2013 Hyundai Elantra from Hyundai of Cool Springs (A Business Impact Partner of WAY-FM) during Memorial Day Weekend

Then last week, my wife told me she found a great deal on a 2013 Honda Sonata, after browsing the website for Hyundai of Cool Springs. So I drove there the next day to check it out. Within 30 minutes, I was offered a deal that I felt would be foolish to turn down.

We Bought a 2013 Hyundai Elantra from Hyundai of Cool Springs (A Business Impact Partner of WAY-FM) during Memorial Day Weekend

However, by the time we test drove the Sonata as a family a few days later, my wife just wasn’t feeling it. When I turned around to the back seat and asked our 5 and a half year-old son Jack what he thought about the car, he apathetically shrugged off my question with, “I don’t know.”

I could see the Sonata just wasn’t the right ergonomic fit for our family, or for my wife in particular; this was important as the new vehicle would be her commuter car from Spring Hill to Nashville every day once she returns to work from maternity leave.

We Bought a 2013 Hyundai Elantra from Hyundai of Cool Springs (A Business Impact Partner of WAY-FM) during Memorial Day Weekend

My wife then revealed to me she had also seen a 2013 Elantra on the website too. We mentioned this to our sales professional, Corey Carpenter, who was happy to show us the other vehicle. He assured our family he was there to help us choose the vehicle that was truly right for us. We never once sensed any bit of pressure from him, which gave us confidence throughout the experience.

You can imagine how this story ends. Before we even made it to the stop sign as we began our test drive of the Elantra, we all knew as a family that this was our car. When I asked our son Jack this time, he instantly responded, “I love this car!”

We Bought a 2013 Hyundai Elantra from Hyundai of Cool Springs (A Business Impact Partner of WAY-FM) during Memorial Day Weekend

Based on the fact our month-old daughter Holly remained asleep during the ride and didn’t make a peep, I assume she approved as well.

Obviously, the Sonata that we originally came there for is a great vehicle, I think it’s just that perhaps the Elantra somehow caters more to my wife and me as Millennial parents (both born in 1981). We liked the smaller, faster-feeling, more concise feel of the Elantra.

We Bought a 2013 Hyundai Elantra from Hyundai of Cool Springs (A Business Impact Partner of WAY-FM) during Memorial Day Weekend

My wife keeps saying how nice, classy and clean the Elantra is. She loves the seat warmers, the mocha interior, the rubber floor mats, and the tinted windows.

As for me, I especially love the wheels and the way the car handles.

I’m sure it’s no surprise that like any vegan/vegetarian family, the first place we drove our new car was straight to Whole Foods, from the Hyundai Cool Springs parking lot. Typical.

We Bought a 2013 Hyundai Elantra from Hyundai of Cool Springs (A Business Impact Partner of WAY-FM) during Memorial Day Weekend

And that, is the story of the conversion of our family from Honda to Hyundai. Please keep in mind that neither Hyundai Cool Springs nor WAY-FM had any idea I was going to write this blog post. Again, this is not a sponsored post.

This was no random decision to buy a Hyundai; nor was it a random decision to replace my wife’s vehicle. We had been planning this new car decision for nearly a year, ever since last July when we found out we were going to have another baby.

So financially, we already had the money in the bank. We were just waiting on the right deal on the right vehicle.

We Bought a 2013 Hyundai Elantra from Hyundai of Cool Springs (A Business Impact Partner of WAY-FM) during Memorial Day Weekend

The next move is replace my 2004 Honda Element, which I’ve owned for over a decade. We have our sights on a Hyundai Santa Fe; which is one of the company vehicles of WAY-FM. But first, we must build up enough in savings account like we did for the Elantra. Hopefully in about a year or so, we’ll be ready for that purchase.

I love the Hyundai Santa Fe because while it still feels like a smaller SUV, it has a 3rd row seat.

We Bought a 2013 Hyundai Elantra from Hyundai of Cool Springs (A Business Impact Partner of WAY-FM) during Memorial Day Weekend

To think, it all began in 2011 when my wife started listening to WAY-FM on the way to work, telling me how funny The Wally Show was and that she really liked the music. From there, I began listening to it as well, soon making it the main station I listen to.

That set everything else in motion.

If you have any other questions about our family’s experience, just leave a comment. I’m pretty good at getting back to my readers in the comment section.

We Bought a 2013 Hyundai Elantra from Hyundai of Cool Springs (A Business Impact Partner of WAY-FM) during Memorial Day Weekend