Dear Jack: Your Proposed Aliens-Themed Birthday Party/The Butt Club

5 years, 9 months.

Dear Jack: Your Proposed “Aliens and Butts” Birthday Party Idea

Dear Jack,

This is your first week of being in Kindergarten all day long. I can tell you love it and that you’re having a good time making new friends.

Based on conversations I’ve been hearing you have with Mommy, apparently you and your new friends have been having meetings on the playground as part of what you call “The Butt Club” where you all “talk about butts.”

I appreciate this concept. It’s like an underground movement where Kindergartner boys can meet secretly to freely discuss the greatness of “butts”; a topic that is taboo in the classroom.

It would be my speculation that “having gas” would be a popular topic of discussion, as you and your friends of The Butt Club talk about butts.

On Tuesday when I came home from work, I handed you a surprise I picked up from the treasure box at the dentist office: a bendable alien toy.

You were so excited when you turned him around and saw that he had a visible butt!

This toy alien gave you much joy, and entertainment, for the rest of the evening; eventually, a clever and original idea was born:

You asked Mommy about having an alien-themed birthday party for when you turn 6 in November. Unsurprisingly, you were quick to also mention the inclusion of “butts” as part of the theme, as well.

We’ve still got 3 months to figure out how to accomplish this theme for your birthday party. Last year, we didn’t have an official party for you, since we took a trip to Florida to celebrate instead.

But with a newborn sister, and a week-long trip to San Diego for Uncle Jake’s wedding at the end of September, another trip in November is unlikely.

So maybe an alien-themed is possible… I’m just not so sure about the butts.

Love,

Daddy

Dear Holly: Dolly the Doppelganger and Belle of the Ball Instagram Posts

15 weeks.

Dolly and Holly. ‪#‎doppelganger‬

Dear Holly,

This past weekend our family didn’t do much, which is very unusual for us. Therefore, the main thing I did was take care of you.

You better believe, though, that it was crucial to keep my phone nearby so I could take some inevitably good pictures of you to share with the world on Instagram.

The first magnificent shot was when Dolly (the doll your Grandma sent you from California, in which your brother Jack adopted as he practiced for you) ended up near your play mat.

It just so happened you were wearing pink and white, just like Dolly. So I placed the doll right next to you, and the magical shot was born.

The rest of the world agreed that Dolly really is your doppelganger!

Then later that afternoon, you spit up on your outfit you were wearing, so Mommy helped you with a wardrobe change.

Dear Holly: Dolly the Doppelganger and Belle of the Ball Instagram Posts

Belle of the ball.

She put you in the dress that Uncle Andrew and Aunt Dana sent you. My immediate thought when I saw you in front of me was, “belle of the ball.”

It instantly became one of my favorite pictures of you, ever. How could it not?

Look at your big smile. Look at the way you appear to be playing in your dress.

Seriously, just look at how beautiful and happy you are!

I know it’s only natural to see my own baby daughter as the prettiest little girl I’ve ever seen, but truly, you are one beautiful baby.

And it only makes sense that you would be, when I look at Mommy.

So while last weekend was seemingly uneventful overall, I was proud to capture two wonderful pictures of you:

One hilarious picture and one adorable picture.

And I see how that’s what kind of little girl you are proving to be already: hilarious, yet beautiful.

Love,

Daddy

Dear Holly: Dolly the Doppelganger and Belle of the Ball Instagram Posts

Vegan Confession: I Have Nightmares I Eat Meat

Vegan Confession: I Have Nightmares that I Eat Meat

I realize that for 97% of the population, a dream about eating meat would not be deemed as a nightmare. But for me, it is every time. I have these kinds of dreams about once every couple of months, at least.

It’s funny how that’s how my brain subconsciously creates a “bad” dream. But imagine if you were me:

No pork or shellfish (kosher) since November 2008, no meat at all since December 2011, no animal products at all (including eggs, cheese, milk, or any dairy) since April 2013.

Imagine that’s your life. Then consider what it was like last night for me to dream this:

I was on my way to see a movie with my son. But in a hurry and in need of a quick meal, I stopped by McDonald’s and bought a Double Quarter Pounder with Cheese.

Sure, it tasted great. But immediately, I was racked with guilt, knowing that eating this cheeseburger not only disqualified me from being a vegan and a vegetarian after all these years, but also from being kosher; since a kosher-abiding person cannot consume dairy product along the meat in the same meal.

Then, in the dream, I began trying to figure out how I would explain this to my wife. Before she or I even became vegetarians, she was never okay with me going to McDonald’s.

As expected, it wasn’t too long before the undigested meat began racing through my digestive track. Oh yes- you guessed it- a race to the restroom…

And I’m sure that’s exactly what would happen if I did suddenly did eat meat and cheese.

The most interesting part of this nightmare was that I began questioning whether it may just be a dream. So I began saying out loud, “Wake up… this probably isn’t real!”

I guess it worked. I woke up. But I’ve been having flashbacks all day long.

So if you eat meat, be glad you don’t have to deal with these kinds of nightmares.

Below is the video version of this blog post, where I go into a mysterious tunnel…

What If Political Bumper Stickers Were Actually Effective in Instantly Converting Those Who See Them?

What If Political Bumper Stickers were Actually Effective in Converting Those Who See Them?

I think the concept of opinionated bumper stickers is hilarious.

Granted, I’m not talking about the ones that are supposed to be hilarious like, “I may be driving slow, but at least I’m in front of you.” That’s intended to be funny, and it is.

Instead, I’m referring to the ones that are meant to apparently convert people’s beliefs and ideology.

The best example of this ridiculous notion is when I see political bumper stickers; which as a commuter in Nashville, is a constant occurrence.

Just imagine: A politically neutral person is at the red light, behind an old Ford pick-up truck with a “Trump for President 2016: Make America Great Again” bumper sticker.

In that moment, a revelation comes over him, as he says to himself, “Yeah, that’s what we need… I can’t believe I never thought about it before. We need Trump to run this country!”

Five minutes later, after having converted from “politically neutral” to “Trump supporter”, this same man is now behind a Nissan Versa. He sees the bumper sticker: Hillary Clinton 2016: I’m With Her.

It’s now as if the man’s whole world has just been rocked. How could he have ever thought Trump was a good idea? Clearly, Hillary Clinton is the way to go.

What a sigh of relief. And yet what an embarrassment that he was ever swayed by that Trump bumper sticker. Fortunately, the Hillary Clinton bumper sticker has now overridden the influence of the one before it.

You can imagine how this story goes on. At each new red light on the commuter’s drive home, he is exposed to a different car with a different political bumper sticker; alternating between Trump and Clinton.

By the time the man finally arrives home, he ultimately choses the candidate he most recently saw the bumper sticker for; whoever that happened to randomly be.

All is well now. He’s made up his mind…

Until the commute back to work in the morning.

Social Media, Help Me Find My Twin: Campbell’s Go Southwest Style Chicken with Quinoa

 

Dear Social Media,

I am recruiting your help today. I believe that together, we can find my twin, whose image can be found on the current Campbell’s Go Southwest Style Chicken with Quinoa package.

Granted, he’s not my actual twin, but instead, my apparent doppelganger; as my friends on Facebook have collectively agreed.

Last year March here on my blog, I first mentioned this finding. Since then, Campbell’s has evidently made a slight change to the their packaging, changing the name of the flavor of this soup from Chicken & Quinoa with Poblano Chilies… to Southwest Style Chicken with Quinoa.

Social Media, Help Me Find My Twin: Campbell's Go Southwest Style Chicken with Quinoa

Either way, it’s the same guy in the picture.

Can you help me find him? I think it would be cool for us to meet up for a photo opp.

I am curious to see how much we actually look alike when we are side-by-side. I would also like to learn other similarities:

How tall is he? I’m 5′ 9″.

What’s his ethnic background? Mine is Mexican and Italian.

Where is he from? I live near Nashville, Tennessee.

Social Media, Help Me Find My Twin: Campbell's Go Southwest Style Chicken with Quinoa

I understand right now that Americans are more focused on Pokemon Go, but I’m sure there’s someone out there who could help me find the model who posed for this soup packaging.

Last March when I did my original post, Campbell’s (understandably for legal reasons) was not able to give me any information on this male model.

Here is the Facebook conversation I had with their social media person:

Nick Shell  3/10, 7:52 pm

 Hi, I’m Nick Shell from Family Friendly Daddy Blog. My recent story featuring Campbell’s Go has been my most popular this week! (Am I The Guy From The Campbell’s Go Chicken & Quinoa With Poblano Chilies Package?) As random as the conversation is, it is proving relevant in my social media circles :) So the truth is, I’m actually a vegan and my wife and son are vegetarians. But if there’s anyway I could land an “email interview” with the actual model used for that package, it would make very a really cool, unique follow-up story that would serve as more product placement for Campbell’s Go. It would also give the model guy some extra exposure for his career. Is there any chance at making that happen? Thank you so much for your reply.

Facebook User  3/12, 8:23 am

Thank you for your message, Nick. Unfortunately, specific information about actors is controlled/proprietary to our ad agency. Can you please provide us with your contact information? Your comments and inquiry will be forwarded to our team and should they be interested in working with you, they will reach out directly.

As you can see, by going back to my old Facebook messages, social media account now simply shows up as “Facebook User”, where as before, it was something like “Campbell’s Soup”.

So maybe now, a year later, someone at Campbell’s would be willing to go out on a limb and help me find my doppelganger.

But if not, how about you, social media? Can you help me?

 

Sincerely,

Nick Shell of Family Friendly Daddy Blog

AKA: The Guy Who Looks Like the Guy from the Campbell’s Go Southwest Style Chicken with Quinoa

Social Media, Help Me Find My Twin: Campbell's Go Southwest Style Chicken with Quinoa