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Dear Jack: Your Special Friend, Jenna/Sk8ter Boi/Glue Vs. Ice: The Movie

5 years, 9 months.

Dear Jack: Your Special Friend, Jenna/Sk8ter Boi/Glue Vs. Ice: The Movie

Dear Jack,

You love being grown up. Kindergarten is cool. You were so ready for it.

Every morning, I drop you off at Holly’s daycare; from there, you ride the bus to your school. After just a few days of our new routine, you started telling Mommy and me about a new friend named Jenna.

Apparently, from Day #1 she has taken the initiative to be a special friend to you. It sounds like it all started when the two of you starting walking onto the bus together and sharing a seat.

We’ve yet to meet Jenna; as she apparently shows up after I drop you off each day. But we do know that she’s older; she’s in 1st grade.

Sure, you like hanging out with the boys and girls in your actual Kindergarten class, but undoubtedly, there’s something special about that 1st grader, Jenna.

As for now though, she remains a mystery to your parents.

Meanwhile, I love watching you develop your style and interests. As I took a picture of you last week, I thought to myself, “He looks like a little skateboarder.”

Then over the weekend, Mommy was telling me how you’ve been talking about wanting a skateboard.

In our cul-de-sac, it appears that boys ride skateboards while girls ride bikes.

Here you are, going on 6 years-old, and you don’t know how to ride a bike. But thing is, you don’t seem to care. Instead, you want to ride a skateboard.

As your parents, we’re here to support your interests and talents.

Therefore, our kitchen table is currently covered with different colored pieces of construction paper, in which you’ve drawn the names of each person in our family… in glue.

Wednesday evening after you finished dinner, you looked up from the paper plate with an ice cube on it, onto which you were squirting glue.

You suggested, “Hey Daddy, they should make a movie called Glue Vs. Ice.”

I’m confident you were inspired after this past weekend when you and I watched the straight-to-Netflix movie, Airplane Vs. Volcano.

When I asked you who you thought would win the fight, you confidently replied, “I think it would be the glue that wins, because it would just stick to the ice; but the ice couldn’t stick to the glue- it would just explode.”

Sounds like a great movie to me!

Love,

Daddy

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Throwback Thursday: My “Non-Human” Appearance in 1990

Throwback Thursday: My "Non-Human" Appearance in 1990

Today my sister found an old picture of us when my friend Will Biddle was spending the night, back in the summer of 1990.  Her caption simply read:

“You don’t even look human in this picture! I can’t stop laughing!”

After I saw myself, on the far left, I had to instantly agree. I’m assuming my mom was holding the camera, saying, “Okay, now let’s do a silly picture!”

What you see is the result of that.

I guess I was doing my impression of a Goomba from Super Mario Bros. mixed with Steve Urkel? I’m not really sure.

Standing next to me, in the middle, is my friend Will; who sadly, a few months ago, passed away.

And on the far left is my sister.

In an age where posting current pictures of our own kids on Instagram is the norm, it can also be a lot of fun to do the opposite: To show the world the funny kid-version of ourselves from the 80s or 90s.

This photo is 25 years ago.

I hope this picture brought joy to your life today, as it did mine.

Man, we were some funny kids.

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Dear Jack: Your Proposed Aliens-Themed Birthday Party/The Butt Club

5 years, 9 months.

Dear Jack: Your Proposed “Aliens and Butts” Birthday Party Idea

Dear Jack,

This is your first week of being in Kindergarten all day long. I can tell you love it and that you’re having a good time making new friends.

Based on conversations I’ve been hearing you have with Mommy, apparently you and your new friends have been having meetings on the playground as part of what you call “The Butt Club” where you all “talk about butts.”

I appreciate this concept. It’s like an underground movement where Kindergartner boys can meet secretly to freely discuss the greatness of “butts”; a topic that is taboo in the classroom.

It would be my speculation that “having gas” would be a popular topic of discussion, as you and your friends of The Butt Club talk about butts.

On Tuesday when I came home from work, I handed you a surprise I picked up from the treasure box at the dentist office: a bendable alien toy.

You were so excited when you turned him around and saw that he had a visible butt!

This toy alien gave you much joy, and entertainment, for the rest of the evening; eventually, a clever and original idea was born:

You asked Mommy about having an alien-themed birthday party for when you turn 6 in November. Unsurprisingly, you were quick to also mention the inclusion of “butts” as part of the theme, as well.

We’ve still got 3 months to figure out how to accomplish this theme for your birthday party. Last year, we didn’t have an official party for you, since we took a trip to Florida to celebrate instead.

But with a newborn sister, and a week-long trip to San Diego for Uncle Jake’s wedding at the end of September, another trip in November is unlikely.

So maybe an alien-themed is possible… I’m just not so sure about the butts.

Love,

Daddy

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Dear Holly: Dolly the Doppelganger and Belle of the Ball Instagram Posts

15 weeks.

Dolly and Holly. ‪#‎doppelganger‬

Dear Holly,

This past weekend our family didn’t do much, which is very unusual for us. Therefore, the main thing I did was take care of you.

You better believe, though, that it was crucial to keep my phone nearby so I could take some inevitably good pictures of you to share with the world on Instagram.

The first magnificent shot was when Dolly (the doll your Grandma sent you from California, in which your brother Jack adopted as he practiced for you) ended up near your play mat.

It just so happened you were wearing pink and white, just like Dolly. So I placed the doll right next to you, and the magical shot was born.

The rest of the world agreed that Dolly really is your doppelganger!

Then later that afternoon, you spit up on your outfit you were wearing, so Mommy helped you with a wardrobe change.

Dear Holly: Dolly the Doppelganger and Belle of the Ball Instagram Posts

Belle of the ball.

She put you in the dress that Uncle Andrew and Aunt Dana sent you. My immediate thought when I saw you in front of me was, “belle of the ball.”

It instantly became one of my favorite pictures of you, ever. How could it not?

Look at your big smile. Look at the way you appear to be playing in your dress.

Seriously, just look at how beautiful and happy you are!

I know it’s only natural to see my own baby daughter as the prettiest little girl I’ve ever seen, but truly, you are one beautiful baby.

And it only makes sense that you would be, when I look at Mommy.

So while last weekend was seemingly uneventful overall, I was proud to capture two wonderful pictures of you:

One hilarious picture and one adorable picture.

And I see how that’s what kind of little girl you are proving to be already: hilarious, yet beautiful.

Love,

Daddy

Dear Holly: Dolly the Doppelganger and Belle of the Ball Instagram Posts

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Vegan Confession: I Have Nightmares I Eat Meat

Vegan Confession: I Have Nightmares that I Eat Meat

I realize that for 97% of the population, a dream about eating meat would not be deemed as a nightmare. But for me, it is every time. I have these kinds of dreams about once every couple of months, at least.

It’s funny how that’s how my brain subconsciously creates a “bad” dream. But imagine if you were me:

No pork or shellfish (kosher) since November 2008, no meat at all since December 2011, no animal products at all (including eggs, cheese, milk, or any dairy) since April 2013.

Imagine that’s your life. Then consider what it was like last night for me to dream this:

I was on my way to see a movie with my son. But in a hurry and in need of a quick meal, I stopped by McDonald’s and bought a Double Quarter Pounder with Cheese.

Sure, it tasted great. But immediately, I was racked with guilt, knowing that eating this cheeseburger not only disqualified me from being a vegan and a vegetarian after all these years, but also from being kosher; since a kosher-abiding person cannot consume dairy product along the meat in the same meal.

Then, in the dream, I began trying to figure out how I would explain this to my wife. Before she or I even became vegetarians, she was never okay with me going to McDonald’s.

As expected, it wasn’t too long before the undigested meat began racing through my digestive track. Oh yes- you guessed it- a race to the restroom…

And I’m sure that’s exactly what would happen if I did suddenly did eat meat and cheese.

The most interesting part of this nightmare was that I began questioning whether it may just be a dream. So I began saying out loud, “Wake up… this probably isn’t real!”

I guess it worked. I woke up. But I’ve been having flashbacks all day long.

So if you eat meat, be glad you don’t have to deal with these kinds of nightmares.

Below is the video version of this blog post, where I go into a mysterious tunnel…