parenting

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Dear Jack: More than 7 Years Later, I Am Still Very Proud of Your Name

7 years, 3 months.

Dear Jack,

A poll was recently conducted which showed that 18%, nearly 1 in 5 parents, regret the baby name they chose. But more than 7 years later, I can immediately confirm that I am part of the 82% who has no regrets about this.

I am sure there are some subconscious rules that parents have regarding the overall themes of potential names for their baby.

As for me, it is part of my own identity that my own children have classic, easy to spell, easy to recognize, but not overly popular names.

For me, the name Jack perfectly fits this description.

While Jackson (Jaxson, Jaxon, etc.) is undeniably a popular name for boys your age, it is not the same case for the name Jack.

You are the only Jack in your entire grade. Yes, there are Jacksons, but not other Jack.

And it’s been that way ever since you were 7 months old and began daycare.

Even when I was growing up, I never remember there being a Jack in my grade, or any grade before or after mine.

The immediate reason I chose to name you Jack was because that’s my dad’s name. I gave you your first name, and Mommy gave you your middle name; which is William, the name of Mommy’s father, who passed away shortly after Mommy and I were married nearly a decade ago.

While Jack is a very popular go-to name for male protagonists in TV shows and movies, it’s not very often in real life you meet someone named Jack.

It’s a good, strong, masculine name that is instantly interesting; as if it has its own built-in story.

You were so easy to name. And if this can make sense, you definitely wear the name quite well. It’s hard to imagine you having any other name.

You were meant to be my Jack.

Love,

Daddy

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Dear Holly: You are the “Pop” Police, Calling Out People When They Pass Gas

1 year, 10 months.

Dear Holly,

I believe the most appropriate term to call you these days is rascal. You’re old enough to know you’re being cute while at the same time being sneaky. And on top of that, your sincere curiosity only adds to the cuteness and the sneakiness.

As you are now becoming quite ambitious in your attempts to add words to your vocabulary, you have stumbled upon the word pop. A couple of weeks ago while I was holding you, you passed a little bit of gas… I knew immediately as I felt the vibration on my arm.

You looked up at me, as if you were asking for my confirmation, and asked, “Pop?”

I obviously immediately laughed: “Yes, good. You did just have a pop.”

To equate passing gas with the word “pop” was not something I could credit anyone in our family with. You just took it upon yourself to associate the sound you made with a word you already knew.

Therefore, you now make a habit of announcing every time you pop. But what I really love about it is that you continue to still sort of ask for my confirmation.

And now you have moved on to calling out everyone else’s pops.

Without surprise, you say “pop” a lot when your brother is around. He enjoys your special skill in identifying his mischievous actions.

I will say, I didn’t expect that you’d be able to identify what it meant to pass gas, or that you’d have your own designated word for it, before your 2nd birthday.

But hey, you have a 7 year-old brother. It comes with the territory.

Therefore, sometimes without me even realizing what I have done, you’ll look up at me:

“Daddy, pop?”

That’s your special way of saying, “You and I are the only ones in the room right now- and I know it wasn’t me, so…”

Then I have to admit:

“Yep, that’s good, Holly. Daddy had a pop.”

Love,

Daddy

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Dear Jack: Teaching Your Sister How to Use a Cardboard Box

7 years, 3 months.

Dear Jack,

It had been a particularly difficult night, with your sister waking up several times every couple of hours. I received little rest, as I got up each time to help get her back to sleep. So by the time Mommy left for work around 6:15 AM, I collapsed on the couch in the living room, as I trusted you to take care of your sister while I was out of commission.

When I woke up about an hour later, I was delighted to see that, in your creativity, you took it upon yourself to transform an Amazon shipping box in to a couple of helmets for both you and your sister to wear, in the boat you also constructed from the same box.

I am always so proud to see you take initiative to lead your sister in fun activities, which require no direction from me or Mommy. It’s important that you figure out on your own what to do with your time, without needing me as your entertainment supervisor all the time.

The look on your sister’s face, too, is just priceless. She obviously didn’t quite understand why the two of you had box helmets, but she gladly went along with it; just like the day before when the box actually arrived:

You convinced your sister to walk back and forth from the far end of the living room, to the far end of the kitchen, with both of your heads in the box. For good reason, it reminded me of the kind of horse costume where it takes two people to walk; one in the front and one in the back.

I’m just glad that because of your creativity with a shipping box, I was able to catch a solid hour of sleep, while getting confirmation you’re old enough to take care of your sister with your sleeping dad on the couch.

Love,

Daddy

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Dear Holly: Minnie Mouse is Your Best Friend and Elmo is Your Boyfriend

1 year, 9 months.

Dear Holly,

I guess I am learning that every Valentine’s Day at our house is like a “mini” Christmas morning. And speaking of Minnie, she was part of your gifts from Mommy and me:

Pilot Minnie, which includes a pink purse and a pink suitcase.

It is my assumption that little girls your age are equally obsessed with Minnie Mouse and Elmo, with the same mania that teenage girls went crazy over Elvis in the 1950s or The Beatles in the 1960s.

Here is how I perceive things with you right now:

It’s as if Minnie Mouse is your best friend and you want to be just like her. So it’s no surprise to me that yesterday, you clutched her tightly in your hand for both your morning nap and for bed at night. It was like a sleepover.

You just think Minnie Mouse is the coolest girl ever!

And as for Elmo, well… I’m starting to think he’s more than just a friend.

Each time I read you the Little Golden Book, Elmo Loves You, and finish the last page, with a big smile on your face, you lean down and kiss Elmo right on the face: “Mmmmmwhah!”

It’s not like anyone gave you this idea. You just immediately did this the first time, and every time, I have read you the book.

Mommy and I have learned to be careful about even saying Elmo’s name in front you. Because often when we do, you get caught in a trance:

“Elmo? Elmo. Elmo? Elmo! Elmo. Elmo. Elmo. Elmo!…”

At that point, I have to either give in, and take you upstairs and let you watch one of your Elmo DVDs, or I have to find a clever way to distract your train of thought.

So yeah, I convinced: Minnie Mouse is your best friend and Elmo is your boyfriend.

Love,

Daddy

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Dear Holly: I Serve as the Referee, or Quality Control Manager, between You and Your Brother

1 year, 9 months.

Dear Holly,

Your brother loves you very much. And you love him just as much. But there is no doubt that at least half of the time, the two of you require a mediator, or referee, to help keep down the chaos level in our house.

And that role goes to me.

In addition to the two hour window between you both waking up and your brother getting on the bus, much of my energy goes to helping remind your brother to leave you alone.

His way of showing you that he loves you tends to include him tackling you with a pillow or conducting the rowdiest version of “Ring around the Rosey” I have ever seen.

Most of the time, his activities result in you laughing. But that does mean that sometimes, and I never know when, the result will be you crying instead.

I do my best to let the two of you naturally play together without my intervention; or prevention of destruction. Still, I feel like a referee, or at least a Quality Control Manager.

But there are definitely times where the two of you get along so easily, that I feel that things are a little too easy for me.

It’s a regular thing for you just to hang out next to Jack while the two of you eat snacks. Neither of you show any direct attention to each other. You’re both just content to be sitting next to each other.

So when you’re just chilling out together, my role is not so necessary. But the moment you both get up to go play in the living room, I always have to think to myself:

“Is this going to be a time where they quietly just play Legos together? Or is this going to be where they potentially break furniture?”

I imagine this eventually gets easier for me.

Love,

Daddy