parenting

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Dear Jack: Your First Bicycle Ever- Christmas Came Early, Again

5 years, 10 months.

Dear Jack: Your First Bicycle Ever- Christmas Came Early, Again

Part of Christmas came early while we were at Nonna and Papa’s house a couple of weeks ago when they surprised you and your cousin Calla with your very own bikes for when you visit. This is your very first bike… it’s a big deal!

You and Calla got to work right away, driving down Nonna and Papa’s new driveway. I helped you as Uncle Andrew helped Calla.

The main thing you really needed my help with learning how to use the brakes. It took a few tries before you were able to get the muscle memory down of peddling backwards to stop.

You learned the hard way when we made it all the way into the neighbor’s yard across the street and almost crashed into a tree, as I saved you just in time. But you learned how to brake.

However, your main concern wasn’t to learn how to ride a bicycle, but instead, to race your cousin down the driveway.

“Calla, I’m beating you!” you repeatedly taunted.

She kept reminding you, “It’s not a race, Jack. I’m just having fun.”

Then when she eventually was in the lead, you declared, “Calla, all you care about is winning!”

You even became concerned that Dana pushing Cousin Darla in the stroller would beat you in a race. You didn’t take them lightly.

However, the spirit of competition ceased once the two of decided to take a break and jump on the trampoline; which is another Christmas gift that Nonna and Papa gave you and Calla early this year before the weather gets too cold.

When you got back to school the next Monday and one of the teachers asked you how your weekend was, you immediately responded with a big smile, “I got a bike!”

Needless to say, you are very happy about your very first bike, as well as the trampoline, for you to enjoy whenever you go to visit Nonna and Papa’s.

Love,

Daddy

Dear Jack: Your First Bicycle Ever- Christmas Came Early, Again

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My Reaction to the Chicco “Performance Review” Video, By Guest Blogger Jill Shell

 

This is a special blog post by Jill Shell, the wife of the man behind Family Friendly Daddy Blog.

Let me just start by stating the obvious: being a parent is hard work.  Anyone who has been lucky enough to have a child, or perhaps two or three (or more), can testify to this.  It is a full time job with endless responsibilities, long hours, restless nights, and well, you get the picture.  Tack onto this a job outside of the home and you bring life to a whole new level of “crazy.”  Our family welcomed a beautiful baby girl to the world 5 months ago and have been learning to get into a new groove of life with two working parents, a Kindergartner and an infant and it hasn’t been easy.

My Reaction to the Chicco "Performance Review" Video, By Guest Blogger Jill Shell

Before taking maternity leave, I worried about everything: about leaving my duties in the hands of others; about missing too much; about not being missed; about being replaced; about meeting the needs of two children at once; and mostly about returning to work and the numerous anxieties of leaving my kids and having to perform as if I hadn’t just brought another human being into the world.  It was a whirlwind of thoughts and angst that was building up in me, but seemingly it dissipated as the baby arrived and we began a new routine at home.  My focus was on my family and I was getting good at balancing the caring, the cooking, the cleaning, and everything in between.  When, alas, my four months was quickly coming to an end and the reality of being a working mom set in.

I’ve been back to work for 5 weeks now and it was harder than I could have ever imagined.  For the first three weeks back, it seemed like I could get to the middle of the week still afloat, but by Wednesday evening, I felt like the world was caving in on me.  Every minute of the day was spoken for and it was rush, rush, rush through it all.  I found myself day dreaming about any other way I could support the household income and raise my children at home.  Then it happened.  The transition period ended and it feels like we’ve gotten to a new level of “normal.”

As I look around, I see lots of families, moms and dads, in the same boat and it’s comforting to know that more people are there supporting you and watching you succeed, rather than waiting to see you fail.

 

After watching the Chicco “Performance Review” video which is part of their #NeverStopGrowing campaign, I love the response from Jess’s co-worker, Aaron, in the video where he sincerely tells her that he has no idea how she does what she does.  Because the truth is, Jess probably doesn’t even realize half of the tasks she takes on and completes.  She’s doing what she needs to do.  She’s found her new normal and with the help of her family and co-workers, realizing it’s a natural fit.

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Dear Holly: You Become a Sleepy Marshmallow When Either Nonna or Aunt Dana Holds You

21 weeks.

Dear Holly: You Become a Sleepy Marshmallow When Nonna or Aunt Dana Hold You

Dear Holly,

One of my main roles when I am holding you or playing with you is to challenge you both physically and socially.

For example, I hold you to where your feet are touching the ground, so you have to stand up; therefore building your muscle and improving your balance. Plus, I am constantly testing your social reaction time by making different noises and moving objects around you to see your heard turn to follow and to make noises back at me.

Truly, it’s an intense and involved process when you’re with me. Granted, the whole time I’m telling you how cute and adorable you are…

And it’s not that Mommy nor your brother aren’t cooing over you either, because we all treat you like the adorable, lovable little girl you are.

It’s just that I couldn’t help but notice whenever you are back in Alabama with Nonna and Aunt Dana, it’s like you become this different little baby… because you know you can get away with it.

In such a relaxed environment away from the hustle and bustle of the Nashville life we are used to, you know you get to just be lazy.

So when Nonna holds you, it’s as if you just melt into a marshmallow state of being. You just get sleepy and take a one hour nap like it’s nothing.

But first, as I joke to everyone, your IQ drops first…

Even though you have developed social and physical skills in your 4 and a half months out of the womb, it’s like you just forget about all that; instead pretending to be a newborn who doesn’t know any better.

I witnessed this hilarious situation with you when Aunt Dana had you: She sat you in her lap and wrapped you up in a blanket, leaving only your head exposed, as your watched your brother Jack and cousin Calla play for nearly an hour.

It took me several minutes to even see you there, as you never made a sound. You just quietly chilled out, as if you were hiding.

This is proof that different members of the family, in a more relaxed environment, can bring out a different side of you when you are around them.

When you’re with them, you can get away with just being a sleepy marshmallow.

Love,

Daddy

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Dear Jack: To You, a Person’s Hair or Eye Color is Just as Much (or Little) as a Defining Trait as Their Skin Color

5 years, 10 months.

Dear Jack: To You, a Person’s Hair or Eye Color is Just as Much (or Little) as a Defining Trait as Their Skin Color

Dear Jack,

While we spent this past weekend at Nonna and Papa’s in Fort Payne, Alabama, I made a comment about how your baby sister Holly is so pink. Just by being out under the overcast, cloudy sky for a few hours on Saturday, she managed to get a bit sunburned; which made her an even darker shade of pink than she naturally is.

After you heard me say a few times that your sister is the color pink, you thought back to the bedtime song I taught you, “Red and yellow, black and white, they are precious is His sight; Jesus loves the little children of the world.”

Wanting to learn more about how people can be different colors, you asked me, “Daddy, who is white?”

I attempted to explain, holding a white piece of paper up to my tan arm: “Well, my skin color is called white, but as you can see, there’s a lot of difference in my skin color and this piece of paper. It’s more like everybody is a shade of brown.”

Your next question was directed to Papa, as you noticed his skin is even tanner than mine; and definitely darker than yours or your sister’s:

“Papa, are you black?” you asked in complete sincerity and innocent curiosity.

The fact you are nearly 6 years-old and still don’t know the generic colors that society identifies as is because I haven’t made a point to explain it to you. I haven’t seen a reason to.

On your own, you have recognized that certain people have darker skin than you, but it’s never been exclusive to someone who is of any certain race.

For example, one of your teachers is from Pakistan; you know that she has very dark skin, but you don’t know what her race is; nor do you care.

From what I can tell, a person’s hair color or eye color is just as much (or little) as a defining trait as their skin.

Love,

Daddy

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Dear Jack: Your Sister Truly Adores You More than I Realized

5 years, 9 months.

Dear Jack: Your Sister Truly Adores You More than I Realized

Dear Jack,

It is important to me that the good and healthy relationship between you and your baby sister is not fabricated or superficial. I don’t want you to hear me saying to another adult, “Ah, he loves his sister and she loves him. They really love each other,” and then in turn you began fulfilling the script in an effort to please me.

Instead, I want to see true mutual love between you to; real and natural.

I have to say, my expectations have been exceeded greatly. You have yet to ever act intimidated by the attention she gets for being the cute little baby girl she is.

What I see instead, is that you are confident in yourself. You are not competing with her.

I say this because one of the first thoughts I had when Mommy and I learned that Holly would be coming, was, “I need to proactively make sure Jack gets enough attention since he won’t be the only child anymore.”

But honestly, it has yet to be an issue. You’re our Kindergartner boy. You are independent and assured.

Your identity is secure in being our firstborn son, not our baby girl. I see no struggle on your end for you to compete for your parents’ attention.

Just take a look at this picture I took of you and your sister before school. Obviously, you’re so proud to have her as your sister.

But just look at the way she looks at you.

That’s how it always is.

I can be on the living floor playing with her while Mommy is making dinner, but the moment she hears or sees you walking in from the other room, she immediately turns her attention directly to you.

She loves you. I think you need to expect her to look up to you from here on out.

Love,

Daddy