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Dear Holly: Your Brother is Practicing for You with a Baby Doll

32 weeks.

Dear Holly: Your Brother is Practicing for You with a Baby Doll

Dear Holly,

As we were spending the night at Nonna and Papa’s house last weekend, your brother Jack and I were looking through your Aunt Dana’s old dolls as Mommy was waking up.

I grabbed a naked Cabbage Patch doll and a blanket. Then, I covered up Mommy’s waist with the blanket and placed the doll underneath, then announced, “Oh, Jack… Mommy’s having the baby now!”

Jack’s eyes got big and he stood still anxiously beside the bed, as he watched me pull out the doll, feet first, from underneath the blanket.

It wasn’t until he saw the Cabbage Patch’s head that he realized it was a joke.

We all immediately began laughing, but I noticed how enthralled Jack was at what he thought was your birth.

When we got back to Tennessee, our family went to Target: Mommy was checking in on her registry; meanwhile, I hung out with Jack in the toy section.

I was not surprised to hear your brother’s first request: “Daddy, let’s see if they have any Cabbage Patch babies.”

The idea was now in his mind to practice taking care of a baby, in relation to your arrival.

(He’s been practicing drawing “babies in their diapers” at school this week.)

However, they only had “kid” Cabbage Patch dolls, no babies.

But then, once we arrived back at our house, we learned that, coincidently, your Grandma (Mommy’s Mommy) in California mailed you a baby doll this week. Quite immediately, your brother Jack took it upon himself to take care of it until you can.

Within minutes, he was rocking the doll in the swing. He also named it “Dollee,” which is not to be confused with “Dolly”: He was very specific about that.

Granted, your brother has a stuffed animal collection which is likely larger than that of the average 5 year-old boy. However, that’s not the same as playing with dolls.

He’s never expressed interest in pretending like a human baby doll was real; only animals.

Until now. “Dollee” is clearly the personification of Jack imagining and preparing what it will be like when you arrive.

Instead of Holly, it’s Dollee… for now.

Of course, he plays with Dollee like a boy would. Tonight, Dollee derailed a train.

Jack insisted that Dollee sleep in his bed with him. It’s very clear to me he is expressing his excitement about you getting here in about 8 weeks.

Love,

Daddy

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Dear Holly: You Technically Traveled Back in Time 2 Weeks

31 Weeks.

Dear Holly: You Technically Traveled Back in Time 2 Weeks

Dear Holly,

This week Mommy went in for another check-up.

Mommy told me the appointment went well and the shot wasn’t that bad. Interestingly, she was only up 2 ounces from her last weigh in. (Her coat must have weighed more than she thought from the last weigh in).

She told me the nurse who draws blood and gives shots is the best one and Mommy told her that as well!

Mommy has an ultrasound scheduled in less 2 weeks (March 1st)  when her own Mommy will be visiting here in Tennessee. During this appointment, they will determine whether the placenta has moved up. (Plus, I can get extra confirmation you truly are a girl.)

This week when they measured Mommy’s stomach, they said it’s measuring around 28 weeks which is a few weeks behind, but the midwife said it should be okay—that makes us wonder if you will be a May baby after all. (Your due date has been April 21st this whole time.)

So with this week’s appointment taking place on Tuesday while you were still 30 weeks old in the womb, and today making you 31 weeks old, that means you are measuring 2 weeks behind.

The way I see it, you technically traveled back in time 2 weeks.

On March 1st for the next appointment, we can also get another confirmation you are indeed a girl.

The reason for doubt is that so many people who have seen the way Mommy is carrying you, say she looks like she’s carrying a boy.

I’m looking forward to seeing the new sonogram pictures too. I’m sure I’ll see how you still look like Mommy.

Oh, and you are constantly moving around inside Mommy’s tummy. I can’t hug her without feeling you kick me! You are so active.

We’ll be meeting you in about 2 months now. We are so excited.

Love,

Daddy

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Dear Holly: A Glimpse of Your Upcoming Family Life

30 weeks.

Dear Holly: A Glimpse of Your Upcoming Family Life

Dear Holly,

Tuesday night as I was finishing up dishes downstairs, I happened to hear the conversation going on upstairs, as Mommy was getting your brother Jack ready for bed.

I heard Jack telling Mommy, “Daddy gets toothpaste all over my mouth when he brushes my teeth in the morning. Daddy’s crazy!”

Mommy replied, “Yes, you’ve got a crazy Daddy and you’re lucky to have him.”

That made me feel all warm inside as I heard it.

I then decided to join the moment by sneaking upstairs with my new toy:

Earlier that day, thanks to a Barnes and Noble gift card I had received after helping out a friend, I was able to purchase a really cool pack rat puppet, from the brand Folkmanis.

I’ve named my new puppet Magellan the Mouse and he will be a new main character on web series, Uncle Nick’s Enchanted Forest.

Your brother Jack was standing at the top of the stairs, facing Mommy, as he was getting dressed for bedtime.

Quite successfully, I sneaked up the stairs without him realizing it, just inches away from his feet.

Using a Wisconsin accent, I used Magellan’s movable arms to grab Jack’s ankles, proclaiming, “I’m Magellan the Mouse.”

Though I definitely scared him, he was more excited than anything, to see a life-like puppet in action.

Jack then stuck his finger in Magellan’s mouth and began asking the puppet to start biting him because “it feels like a real rat biting me.”

That’s a glimpse of your upcoming life.

On any given night, you can likely expect something like this to be going on.

You will be raised by an eccentric Daddy who is always up to some new shtick to grow his YouTube audience in an effort to legitimately become a professional actor and entertainer.

Meanwhile, your brother will be crafting his own weird experiments, like placing his leftover Halloween candy into warm saltwater to watch it dissolve, as opposed to showing any interest or excitement in eating it.

Mommy’s the “normal” one. But by default, she can’t be all that normal when she is surrounded by Jack and me.

So where does that leave you? The next few years will help answer that question.

But I have a feeling that you will take after me in more ways than one.

Love,

Daddy

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Dear Holly: The One-to-One Parent-to-Kid Ratio When You Get Here

29 weeks.

Dear Holly: The One-to-One Parent-to-Kid Ratio When You Get Here

Dear Holly,

There will be quite the celebration when you arrive in about 11 weeks. It’s so exciting to see new packages at our door every couple of days: new outfits for you, as well as diapers and wipes…

And even that double stroller a few weeks ago. This weekend your brother Jack enjoyed testing it out.

While he is excited, he’s also getting anxious about the changes that will happen when you are born.

Here’s what I predict will happen. For the first several months, I think he and I will naturally team up, to balance out the fact Mommy will be spending so much time taking care of you as a mother does for her newborn.

There will be a one-to-one parent-to-kid ratio for the first time in our family.

That’s actually fine by me. First the first year and a half of your brother’s life, I was by default the 3rd wheel. It was undeniable.

Jack was needing so much of Mommy’s attention, both physically and psychologically, that I often just felt like the silent chauffeur and custodian.

Socially, I didn’t really feel that needed.

I feel that won’t be the case in April.

Jack will depend on me as someone to keep paying attention to him on a constant basis, which as an only child up until this point, is something he’s accustomed to.

My plan is simply this: I’ll do whatever Mommy needs help with for you, but really, my main job as a parent for the first several months will be to help your brother Jack transition into his role as big brother.

As for you and I, if this is anything like it was for Jack and me, then you won’t really think I’m that big of a deal until you’re about 15 months old. Until then, I’ll mainly be a blurry figure with a deep voice.

I’m okay with that. I know what to expect.

It’s a matter of respecting everyone’s role and place. Mine will be your brother Jack’s shadow until you are able to become more physically independent, but that will be a while.

Love,

Daddy

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Dear Jack: Your 1st Signs of Anxiety about Becoming a Big Brother

5 years, 2 months.

Dear Jack: Your 1st Signs of Anxiety about Becoming a Big Brother

Dear Jack,

A popular question people having been recently asking me is this:

“How is Jack handling the news about there being another baby on the way?”

I was always able to quickly and easily respond by telling them you are excited, and that with a 5 and a year difference, I predict there will be no real concern on your end about a sense of competition.

That changed this week.

Normally you are the happiest kid I know. But on Tuesday night, you were much different at the dinner table.

We had to take you up to bed early because you weren’t really eating and you were crying about (seemingly) nothing and everything all at once.

So we just assumed you didn’t take a nap at school and needed to get to bed sooner.

While that was true, there was more to it.

In your emotionally vulnerable state, you eventually told Mommy that night during bath time:

“I’m sad that you are excited about the baby.”

Just an hour or so before, Mommy and I had been doting over the cute, girly outfits that we had received in the mail for Holly.

You went on to tell Mommy: “I wish things could stay the same.”

When she replied you two would get to be together for the summer while she is on maternity leave, you said “Just me and you?”

I knew you are smart kid, but I was unaware at 5 years old that you are able to clearly express your anxieties and fears to us, in such a sober and direct way.

That’s emotional intelligence.

It’s not my attention and affection that you fear missing. It’s Mommy’s.

She and I talked about it more. It’s heartbreaking to see you this way, worrying that you’ll lose your relationship status with Mommy.

In some ways, there is reality in your fears of things changing when your sister gets here.

But at the same time, you have two parents who are proactively dedicated to making sure we help you with this transition.

Love,

Daddy