marriage

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Dear Jack: Uncle Jake and Aunt Stephanie’s Wedding Reception (San Diego Vacation/2016 Mitsubishi Outlander)

5 years, 11 months.

Dear Jack: Uncle Jake and Aunt Stephanie’s Wedding Reception (San Diego Vacation/2016 Mitsubishi Outlander)

After a cinematic-quality wedding ceremony on the water, we all made our way inside for Jake and Stephanie’s wedding reception, which was also quite the class act.

You buddied up with your cousin Savannah, who you don’t often get to see when we fly out to California each summer. As I look back on these pictures from a few weeks ago, I can’t help but notice how much she looks like Mommy, just without the bangs.

Dear Jack: Uncle Jake & Aunt Stephanie’s Wedding Reception (San Diego Vacation/2016 Mitsubishi Outlander) r6

I’m not used to this, but it turns out I wasn’t the only vegan there! I was one of 4, actually, and that’s not even counting Mommy, who ordered the special vegan option on the menu; even though she’s not actually a vegan, but a vegetarian instead.

Dear Jack: Uncle Jake & Aunt Stephanie’s Wedding Reception (San Diego Vacation/2016 Mitsubishi Outlander)

Since there were other vegans there, that also meant I actually got to enjoy vegan sweets. I fully recognize this may be the only wedding I ever attend that had its own special vegan wedding cake.

Dear Jack: Uncle Jake & Aunt Stephanie’s Wedding Reception (San Diego Vacation/2016 Mitsubishi Outlander)

Outside on the deck overlooking the water, there was a blank canvas that anyone could help paint, which served as a wedding memory for Jake and Stephanie. You painted a fish for them.

Dear Jack: Uncle Jake & Aunt Stephanie’s Wedding Reception (San Diego Vacation/2016 Mitsubishi Outlander)

After the meal, your cousin Savannah let you play a fun game on her phone, and even took you out to the dance floor!

Jake and Stephanie entertained everyone with a special montage for their first dance. It was very impressive. They obviously had practiced a lot for it.

Dear Jack: Uncle Jake & Aunt Stephanie’s Wedding Reception (San Diego Vacation/2016 Mitsubishi Outlander) r14

During the midst of the dance party, your baby sister Holly did her best to keep up with all the fun. But granted, it was getting past her bed time.

Dear Jack: Uncle Jake & Aunt Stephanie’s Wedding Reception (San Diego Vacation/2016 Mitsubishi Outlander) r15

It’s safe to say that she partied ‘til she dropped!

The wedding and reception were nothing short of magical. Such a good time. Memories that we’ll be holding on to, for sure.

Dear Jack: Uncle Jake & Aunt Stephanie’s Wedding Reception (San Diego Vacation/2016 Mitsubishi Outlander) r12

Jake and Stephanie’s wedding was the whole purpose for our trip. While we had a wonderful time celebrating with them, I can’t deny that we made an epic family vacation out of the trip.

Dear Holly: Your Uncle Jake’s Wedding at Tom Ham’s Lighthouse (San Diego Vacation/2016 Mitsubishi Outlander) Dear Holly: Your Uncle Jake’s Wedding at Tom Ham’s Lighthouse (San Diego Vacation/2016 Mitsubishi Outlander)

We got to visit the San Diego Zoo Safari Park, as well as Legoland. We enjoyed a bonfire, we walked along the coast, and played in the sand. We got to drive all across San Diego in a 2016 Mitsubishi Outlander, with the 3rd row seat which you claimed as your own.

Dear Jack: Uncle Jake & Aunt Stephanie’s Wedding Reception (San Diego Vacation/2016 Mitsubishi Outlander)

And it was all because Aunt Stephanie became a part of the Tuttle family, just like I did 8 years ago.

Too bad we don’t have a big family wedding to attend every year in California!

Love,

Daddy

Dear Jack: Uncle Jake and Aunt Stephanie’s Wedding Reception (San Diego Vacation/2016 Mitsubishi Outlander)

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Exactly 10 Years Ago Today, I Met the Girl I Would Marry

I Married the Right One

Exactly 10 years ago today, on October 5, 2006, I met the girl who I would start dating 4 months later, and marry within 2 years. In a crowded building called The Factory in Franklin, Tennessee, I saw who I thought was a beautiful Puerto Rican or maybe even half-Korean girl.

I was wrong in both my assumptions on her ethnicity, but as I introduced myself to her in a line of hundreds waiting to get into the main room where an episode of CMT’s Crossroads was soon to be filmed, I knew right away that this fellow “extra” for the audience of that episode was A) out of my league and B) someone very intriguing and special.

Now flash-forward to this past August. It was close to midnight in the parking lot of the movie theatre in Spring Hill, Tennessee after having just seen the premiere of Suicide Squad. My friend Jarred and I were laughing as we reminisced about the “10 years-ago” versions of ourselves; back when we lived in a house together along with other bachelors.  During that time frame is when we happened to meet and begin dating our future wives.

He then said something that has stuck with me: “We married the right girls.”

It’s weird to think that the more naïve, less mature version of you is responsible for making one of the most serious (and permanent) decisions of your entire life; a decision that will not only affect other people’s lives but also create new life.

I feel like only now do I know enough about life to begin to make a decision like that. But it doesn’t work that way. Instead, it’s the opposite:

The reason I am now the mature and experienced person I am now is because of the girl I married 8 years ago.

It turns out, the 25 year-old versions of ourselves knew enough of what they were doing when met nearly 10 years ago, fell in love, and got married.

By “doing life” together for nearly a decade now, we have by default taught ourselves and each other what emotional intelligence is all about; making daily conscious decisions to choose to be victorious, not allow ourselves to be victims.

I see emotional intelligence as the inside-out version of what love is. By choosing to love your spouse, you choose to victorious instead of allowing yourself to become a victim.

A decade ago she and I were 25 year-old kids trying to figure out life. Now were are 35 year-old adults with two beautiful children. For the most part, we’re settled down and along for the ride.

I don’t know which surprises and adventures are ahead, but I do know this: She’s the one I want to spend the rest of my future with.

Victors versus Victims

Victor: compliments others

Victim: criticizes others

Victor: embraces change

Victim: fears change

Victor: forgives others

Victim: holds grudges

Victor: always learning

Victim: thinks they know everything

Victor: accepts responsibility for their failures

Victim: blames others for their failures

Victor: has a sense of gratitude

Victim: has a sense of entitlement

Victor: sets goals and develops plans

Victim: never sets goals

3 Comments Posted on marriage, parenting, Storytelling, Uncategorized

My Reaction to the Chicco “Performance Review” Video, By Guest Blogger Jill Shell

 

This is a special blog post by Jill Shell, the wife of the man behind Family Friendly Daddy Blog.

Let me just start by stating the obvious: being a parent is hard work.  Anyone who has been lucky enough to have a child, or perhaps two or three (or more), can testify to this.  It is a full time job with endless responsibilities, long hours, restless nights, and well, you get the picture.  Tack onto this a job outside of the home and you bring life to a whole new level of “crazy.”  Our family welcomed a beautiful baby girl to the world 5 months ago and have been learning to get into a new groove of life with two working parents, a Kindergartner and an infant and it hasn’t been easy.

My Reaction to the Chicco "Performance Review" Video, By Guest Blogger Jill Shell

Before taking maternity leave, I worried about everything: about leaving my duties in the hands of others; about missing too much; about not being missed; about being replaced; about meeting the needs of two children at once; and mostly about returning to work and the numerous anxieties of leaving my kids and having to perform as if I hadn’t just brought another human being into the world.  It was a whirlwind of thoughts and angst that was building up in me, but seemingly it dissipated as the baby arrived and we began a new routine at home.  My focus was on my family and I was getting good at balancing the caring, the cooking, the cleaning, and everything in between.  When, alas, my four months was quickly coming to an end and the reality of being a working mom set in.

I’ve been back to work for 5 weeks now and it was harder than I could have ever imagined.  For the first three weeks back, it seemed like I could get to the middle of the week still afloat, but by Wednesday evening, I felt like the world was caving in on me.  Every minute of the day was spoken for and it was rush, rush, rush through it all.  I found myself day dreaming about any other way I could support the household income and raise my children at home.  Then it happened.  The transition period ended and it feels like we’ve gotten to a new level of “normal.”

As I look around, I see lots of families, moms and dads, in the same boat and it’s comforting to know that more people are there supporting you and watching you succeed, rather than waiting to see you fail.

 

After watching the Chicco “Performance Review” video which is part of their #NeverStopGrowing campaign, I love the response from Jess’s co-worker, Aaron, in the video where he sincerely tells her that he has no idea how she does what she does.  Because the truth is, Jess probably doesn’t even realize half of the tasks she takes on and completes.  She’s doing what she needs to do.  She’s found her new normal and with the help of her family and co-workers, realizing it’s a natural fit.

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Dear Holly: I’m So Tired I Could Cry, But You Sure are Worth It

20 weeks.

Dear Holly: I’m So Tired I Could Cry, But You Sure are Worth It

Dear Holly,

These are the days when my lunch breaks are spent sleeping in my car; waking up to the sound of my cell phone alarm after 55 minutes of deep sleep in the passenger seat of my old Honda Element.

These are the days in which Mommy and I try to be in bed by 9:00 PM; knowing that you’ll be waking up 3 more times before we have to officially wake up for work before 5:00 AM.

These are the days where unless we drive nearly 3 hours to Nonna and Papa’s for the weekend, we don’t get a break.

We both work full-time plus we are both fully involved parents.

But none of that is a burden because of the baby. That’s you.

You are so worth it.

How could I look at you and not just melt? How could I not simply be willing to do whatever it takes to make sure my little baby girl is cared for?

I keep reminding myself that to some degree, things will be much easier in about a month and a half, once you’re able to start eating solid foods. Even though there will be more prep and cleaning, the plan is that you’ll be able to sleep more solidly through the night.

So my eyes won’t always be bloodshot and my head won’t always feel like a bowling ball.

But as for now, these are the days of feeling like a zombie. When people ask me how I’m doing, I always positively respond, because I’m so grateful to have a healthy, happy little girl. That’s the part I focus on.

I choose not to tell them how that physically, I’m barely standing up.

Because other parents already know how this thing works.

You do anything for your baby- that’s normal. It is simply being a parent.

Love,

Daddy

1 Comment Posted on marriage, parenting, Uncategorized

My Wife’s Wedding Dress has Been Transformed into Several Infant Gowns for Families Who Have Lost an Infant (Nae Nae Little Angel Gowns)

My Wife’s Wedding Dress has Been Transformed into Several Infant Gowns for Families Who Have Lost an Infant (Nae Nae Little Angel Gowns)

It is a rare thing for my wife to ever post anything on Facebook, so it really caught my attention when I saw what she announced on her wall this week:

“Thank you, Nae Nae Little Angel Gowns, for turning my wedding dress into something beautiful for families who have lost an infant. For all of those who have a wedding dress or other formal gown just hanging in the closet, you can donate your dress to Nae Nae Little Angel Gowns and they will turn it into a beautiful blessing. I dropped my dress off about a week ago and she has already turned my dress into several infant gowns. Thanks for letting me be a part of this, Nae Nae Little Angel Gowns!”

A year after we got married 8 years ago, we helped our friend Joe Hendricks of Joe Hendricks Photography out by posing as models for his wedding collection to show to future clients. In the process, my wife’s dress got dirt stains on it as we ran through a vineyard.

My Wife’s Wedding Dress has Been Transformed into Several Infant Gowns for Families Who Have Lost an Infant (Nae Nae Little Angel Gowns)

But she didn’t care since she knew the dress would just be sitting in a closet for decades for no practical reason anyway. And those post-wedding photos turned out much better than our actual wedding photos.

My wife is not the kind of person who is okay with things just sitting in the house, taking up space; which is was the dress has been doing this whole time.

We are so happy that the dress could be donated to Nae Nae Little Angel Gowns. I’m grateful my wife was able to learn about this, and now, I present you with the same opportunity.

If this might be something you’d be interested in doing, or at least curious about, simply reach out to Nae Nae Little Angel Gowns on Facebook and just let her know you heard about her service through Family Friendly Daddy Blog.

My Wife’s Wedding Dress has Been Transformed into Several Infant Gowns for Families Who Have Lost an Infant (Nae Nae Little Angel Gowns)