Author: Family Friendly Daddy Blog

4 Comments Posted on car reviews, parenting, People, Storytelling, Uncategorized

This is 36: We Took Our 2 Young Kids on a 7 Hour Road Trip to Florida (So You Don’t Have To!)

Brave. Ambitious. Heroic.

Those are buzz words that people like to throw around these days when referencing someone who dares to go against the norm; someone who is willing to take risks that others dare not.

If that’s the case, then my wife and I are soon to be famous…

Because during past week, we willingly took a 7 hour road trip from Spring Hill, Tennessee (where we live) to Destin, Florida and back… with our 1 year-old daughter and our 6 and a half year-old son.

Not in a minivan. Not in a big SUV. But in a small car.

As Jeb Bush muttered during last year’s campaign… Please clap.

Now I want to warn you, over the next week or so, you will be presented with several blog posts about our recent road trip and vacation to Destin. Riding on tubes at the beach, digging up buried treasure, racing go-karts…

At times, you may even think, “Lucky them! What a cool, fun family! Looks like they’ve got it made!”

If those thoughts cross your mind, think back to this blog post…

In the midst of all the glory and splendor of our trip, we were also caring our daughter who was still recovering from an ear infection.

We were there during a holiday weekend, meaning we were at one point stuck in traffic for 2 and a half hours (during a stretch that should have barely taken us an hour) with that little girl who we were desperately trying to keep asleep, as her older brother who hadn’t had a nap that day was getting way too antsy.

Keep in mind that as we were sharing a condo with family (which definitely saved us money), at one point we got locked outside for about an hour, which delayed our daughter getting to bed that night on schedule. And by the way, it took hours to get her to sleep each night in that new environment, compared to her falling asleep within a few minutes back home in Tennessee.

Consider that the 4 of us all slept in a small room with very squeaky beds, which at any moment my son or my wife or I could (and sometimes did) easily wake the baby.

Near the middle of the vacation, my wife mutually proclaimed we would not be taking another trip like this for years.

Funny though, because by the last day of our trip, we both recanted, asking each other, “Hmm… when can we come do this again?”

Despite the chaos, we truly had a blast.

And the fact that we were in a 2017 Toyota Prius Three, that meant we did the entire road trip on just two tanks of gas! Plus, we very easily stuffed the hatchback with all our stuff. We actually had plenty of room. My wife even rode in the back seat with the kids a few times, while I drove up front.

Our road trip not only produced awesome memories (and photos to prove it), but it helped build character for our family. And I’m all about character arc, because in my opinion, that’s what makes a good story.

I wouldn’t have had it any other way, actually. I think it’s obvious that my wife and I are wired for a good challenge.

We survived. We did it!

This is 36.  

1 Comment Posted on fatherhood, funny, parenting, Storytelling, Uncategorized

This is 36: How I Got Locked Outside of My House While Accidentally Wearing a Mustache

Tuesday afternoon my wife took our kids out to run an errand. We all had the day off, since we had just returned from our vacation to Florida. I decided to stay home while they were out, as it would give me about an hour and 20 minutes of uninterrupted time to finish unpacking from our trip.

The first order of business was actually to shave my beard. I had made a point not to shave while on vacation- just one less thing to worry about in my attempt to relax for a week in the sun.

I already had several days’ stubble before we even left for Destin, so by the time we got back nearly a week later, I had a decent beard going on.

But before I shaved it off, I decided to shoot a quick video for one of my YouTube channels, which caters to young men who are freaking out about seeing the first signs of hair loss. (Yes, I make a supplemental income from that; currently about $50 a month.)

I wanted to make a video which made it seem like people were demanding I grow a mustache, which is hilarious, because obviously a white guy under the age of 40 who isn’t a cop can’t get away with wearing a mustache.

So I shaved off everything but the mustache and walk outside, where there was better natural lighting, and began shooting the video; which again, was a complete joke in itself. I like to keep my 1500 YouTube subscribers on their toes.

 

But after I recorded the video, I realized I had locked myself out of the house. I knew it would be more than an hour before my wife came back home with the kids.

Then down came the rain, accompanied by some light thunder and lightning. And I was barefoot too.

At least I was able to find shelter on our covered front porch. Before my phone battery died, as I was down to about 15% at this point, I figured I might as well commemorate the occasion with a video explaining, behind the scenes, what had happened.

So there you go. That’s how I ended up locked outside of my own house, in the rain, barefoot, while accidentally wearing a mustache.

This is 36.

 

1 Comment Posted on fatherhood, parenting, People, Storytelling, Uncategorized

Dear Holly: Making Super Mario Jump Sounds for Actual Words

1 year, 1 month.

Dear Holly,

Mommy and I both noticed the same thing about your hair over the past week or so. Not only is it getting thicker, but the red tint is transforming into a golden hue.

I’ve caught myself calling you Goldie here recently. It’s not that your hair is blonde. It’s more gold than it is yellow. It’s undeniably golden.

Your brother’s hair was never this color. When he was your age, his hair was light blonde. And now that he’s 6 and a half years old, it has transitioned into a sandy brown. But he never had a red or golden tint at any point.

So I wonder what color your hair will transition to by the time you’re his age.

Maybe I find this more fascinating that most parents would, but I am so amazed that those long lost Scottish and Irish genes in our family tree. The hidden recessive traits are making themselves known in you.

Something else going on with you these days is it’s becoming obvious you are getting eager to start talking. While your actual vocabulary is pretty much limited to “Dadda-dadda-dadda” (me) and “Mama-mama-mama” (Mommy) and “Jaah-ja-ja” (your brother), you are now making sounds in place of words.

These placeholder sounds like identical to Super Mario when he jumps, from the original 1985 Super Mario Bros. game: “Mah-mau?”

You’ll crawl over to one of your books, then bring it back to me, like a puppy. Then you hand it to me and say, “Mau? Mah-mau?”

The obvious translation is, “Well, Daddy, are you going to read me this book, or what?”

You also have a habit of crawling over to fruit pouches when you’re hungry, then looking to me: “Mau? Mah-mau?”

The obvious translation is, “Well, Daddy, you know what to do. It’s time for you to help me eat this.”

While I will be very happy for you when you can start using actual words from the English dictionary, I am thoroughly enjoying the Super Mario jump sounds in the meantime.

Love,

Daddy

1 Comment Posted on fatherhood, People, Storytelling, Uncategorized

Dear Jack: You Love Taking Out the Garbage and Recycling

6 and a half years.

Dear Jack,

We keep the recycling bin pulled up to the side of our pack porch; that way, you get to toss our empty boxes and bags into it throughout the week. Then every Wednesday when I get home from work, you know what it’s time for: The dirty work!

You insist on opening the gate yourself, then wheeling the recycling bin from our back yard to the sidewalk in front of our house. Plus, you drag the garbage bin the same distance as well.

And the way our yard is designed, it’s a very long and skinny plot of land and there’s a sharp slope the whole way along that side of the house.

It’s quite a sight, since both the recycling bin and the garbage bin are much bigger and heavier than you. But honestly, you seem to do the job with more ease than even I can.

Of course, I always supervise, as I walk behind you to make sure you don’t slip on our slanted yard between our house and the next door neighbors.

But so far, you haven’t needed my assistance.

It’s funny because naturally, trash duty will be an official chore of yours when you get a little older. I love it that you already enjoy doing it.

In fact, there was one week where I just went ahead of moved the bins when I came home, because it was about to rain, and you actually got upset that you didn’t get to do it.

Obviously, you also take the empty bins back behind our house on Thursday as well. But I can tell that’s not as much fun for you, since there’s no challenge in transporting a much heavier load.

I am impressed with your garbage man skills. Lucky for me, you like doing the work.

Love,

Daddy

1 Comment Posted on fatherhood, funny, People, Storytelling, Uncategorized

This is 36: My Back Yard is Constantly Littered with Plastic Grocery Bags Filled with Poopy Diapers

It makes perfect sense, I’m sure. Actually, I’m confident that my story is not unique. It’s pretty simple and (assumedly) universal, really:

When our 1 year-old daughter has a poopy diaper, we reach for a plastic Kroger bag from underneath the kitchen sink, using it has an insulator for the smell. Then, without fail, I open up the back door and toss it towards the garbage bin near our fence.

Every couple of days, I have to take out a big bag of trash anyway. That’s when I pick up the 2 or 3 bags of poop to place them in the garbage bin.

What’s the point in walking out to the garbage bin every single time my daughter has a dirty diaper? That doesn’t work for the lifestyle of the Shell household. It wouldn’t be prudent.

On a daily basis, when we’re all home together, my wife is constantly running around the house in the midst of cooking meals and doing laundry, while I am constantly entertaining and occupying not only our daughter, who isn’t quite walking yet, but I am also doing my best to make sure our 6 and a half year-old son is keeping himself productive in some sort of activity.

It’s not worth the time to run outside for the sake of a dirty diaper that is already inside of a plastic bag. I’ve got too many duties that relentlessly need my attention, inside the house.

Besides, our yard is fenced in. It’s not like the neighbors can see the dirty diaper bags; not unless they specifically go upstairs in their homes then look over to our yard.

That would just be nosy.

Therefore, it remains one of our family secrets.

No one can see, so no one can know.

It’s not like I’m posting pictures of the dirty diaper bags on the Internet, bringing attention to it.

This is 36.