For most of my life, I’ve looked back on the previous year thinking, “Man, I was immature back then. I’ve learned a lot in the past year. If only I could go back and live it again knowing what I know now…”
With that being said, I feel that now at age 35, I have created a plan to keep from feeling that way. During the past year, I have formulated and applied my own self-help therapy guide consisting of 7 comparisons of someone who chooses to be victorious, as opposed to allowed the default of the victim mentality.
I believe these have everything to do with whether a person finds success living by their New Year’s Resolutions.
By consciously living by these principles on minute-by-minute basis, I feel like I am really in control of my life. I am simply more independent in my thinking; serving as my own therapist.
These 7 principles are the epitome of the concept: Focus on what you can control, not on what you cannot.
Victors versus Victims
1. Victor: compliments others vs. Victim: criticizes others
2. Victor: embraces change vs. Victim: fears change
3. Victor: forgives other vs. Victim: holds grudges
4. Victor: always learning vs. Victim: thinks they know everything
5. Victor: accepts responsibility for their failures vs. Victim: blames others for their failures
6. Victor: has a sense of gratitude vs. Victim: has a sense of entitlement
7. Victor: sets goals and develops plans vs. Victim: never sets goals
After applying my “choose your mindset” theory for the past year, I felt a sense of graduation of my program when I was able to successfully upload a video on my YouTube channel entitled (can’t offend me).
In other words, I made a public social experiment out of myself by proving that if I simply made the decision that for the rest of my life, I would no longer grant anyone the authority to offend me (or “hurt my feelings”)… for any reason, by any person.
Through personal application of these concept, I fully realized that if I choose it, only I truly have the authority to grant others to offend me. But without my permission being granted, other people have no power of my emotions.
I alone control my emotions; my emotions do not control me.
What it all comes down to is something called emotional intelligence.
It only makes sense that a person who is constantly offended is allowing themselves to be the victim by default. Therefore, it only makes sense that a person who never seems to be offended is therefore making a conscious decision to be victorious.
I am so grateful for the benefits of living my life this way. I have never before felt so in control over my own life, despite the things I truly have no control over.
Feel free to ask me any questions about my “7 Traits” if you are interested in trying it out for yourself.