parenting

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Dear Holly: You are Clearly Fearless and Daring

2 and a half years old.

Dear Holly,

I’m pretty sure I’ll never have to convince you to try new things. As you have been watching your brother speed down the cul-de-sac, you have correctly assumed that you could successfully do the same, on your little school bus.

As you can see in the video above, you amazingly are able to not only use your legs to scoot your way up the hill, but you also confidently use your legs as brakes to slow down.

While I admit I feel that this seems dangerous, I also don’t want to stop you from having fun outside; knowing that you have yet to get hurt doing it.

I think it’s so cool that you loving scooting up and down on your little bus!

Love,

Daddy

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Dear Jack: Teaching Your Sister to Say “Bad Words”, But Not in Context

7 years, 11 months.

Dear Jack,

I’ve recently discovered that when Mommy and I aren’t closely paying attention, like while we are doing the dishes, you discreetly teach your sister “bad words”, as if it’s your obligation as her older brother.

“Holly… butt cheek.”

She will then repeat it and confirm she knows it’s a new word she shouldn’t say:

“Butt cheek.”

Then she grins with gratitude.

However, she doesn’t quite understand the context of most of the Disney-approved bad words you have been teaching her.

That’s why it’s not out of the ordinary for her to casually say, “I want a cheese stick… butt cheek.”

I’m sure in time, though, you’ll be able to teach her how to say these inappropriate phrases a little more appropriately.

 

Love,

Daddy

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Dear Holly: You are Trying So Hard to Have Legitimate Conversations But…

2 and a half years old.

Dear Holly,

Last Sunday while you were playing with your brother’s toys in his bedroom while Mommy sorted out his closet, you took it upon yourself to create a story line.

You swung your purse over your shoulder then grabbed your brother’s poop emoji stuffed animal, then enthusiastically yet routinely announced, “Hey Poop, want to go to church?… Yeah?… Okay, let’s go!”

From there, you pretended to load up Poop in the car for the ride to church.

And yesterday as I was driving you to school, I said, “Look Holly! Those men are putting a new roof on that house!”

Seeing the apparent fun of being able to walk on top of a house, you proclaimed, “I want to walk on the roof for my Christmas.”

In your mind, these scenarios are completely realistic.

That’s good enough for me.

Love,

Daddy

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Dear Holly: The Purple Popsicle Incident

2 years, 5 months.

Dear Holly,

Last night during dinner, you willingly ate all of the food Mommy had put on your plate, but you also made it clear throughout dinner that you had an agenda.

I heard you keep optimistically muttering, “I get purple Popsicle…”

This is an idea you crafted on your own. No one had even been talking about the frozen grape juice treats in the freezer.

But I suppose you had caught a glimpse of them at some point while Mommy was making dinner.

After finishing all the food on your plate, without saying a word, you just hopped out of your chair, ran over to the freezer, and brought me the Popsicle to unwrap for you.

No words were needed.

You know me. You know how to negotiate.

It was fair deal: Eat all your dinner, then just correctly assume I’ll let you have a Popsicle without any fuss.

You finished about half of your treat before you had your fill. Not to mention, you got a little concerned with you looked down and announced, “Oh no! Boo boo!”

I then explained that it was just part of the Popsicle that had dripped down on your leg.

You had become a purple mess.

Love,

Daddy

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Dear Holly: Instead of Going to Bed, Would You Rather Just Watch Dancing with the Stars?

2 years, 5 months.

Dear Holly,

For the slight majority of the time when I put you to bed, you fall asleep shortly afterwards and that’s the end of it.

But for the other times, you find a way to delay the process:

“Elsa Band-Aid?”

“Water?”

“Hug Jack?”

This past week though, we tried a new one out on me and Mommy both.

Twenty minutes after I had put you to bed and assumed you were asleep, you started softly knocking on your bedroom door.

Mommy curiously opened it.

With a confident smile, you cheerfully announced, “Mommy, it’s time to watch!”

You just wanted to see the rest of Dancing with the Stars. Your plan worked… sort of.

We let you watch about 10 minutes before sending you back to bed.

Love,

Daddy