Exactly 10 years ago, we took a family photo to document the short window of time of the calendar year when several members of our family are the exact same age. A decade ago, my wife and I were 33, my sister and her husband were 30, and our only children at time were 3 years old.

Now in October 2024, we actually have a new pair of members to add to the collection. It just so happened that my wife and I had our second child born during the same year span as my sister and her husband.

So the updated version of the picture has now become this:

My wife and I are 43, my sister and her husband are 40, our oldest children are 13 years old, and our youngest children are 8 years old.

Granted, that will change next month with some upcoming birthdays. But for the next few weeks, we have 4 pairs of matching ages.

I just so happened to have recently stumbled upon the original 2014 picture documenting the occurrence. Realizing it was time for a “decade later” photo update, while my wife and I hosted a “Spaghetti and S’mores” dinner at our house this weekend, I made sure to do our photo updates before we earned the right to eat our delicious dinner.

During dinner, I made a toast (pun intended: “s’mores”) to our collective family of ten. I brought up the fact that just a year ago, we were still curiously toying with idea of packing up our lives in Tennessee and moving to Alabama. But in the course of a year, we found the perfect home in Alabama to suit our needs, we sold our Tennessee home, we renovated our Alabama home, our kids started going to a new school, and we as a family of four have settled into our new lives here in general.

Simply put: I am happy and I know it.

I have everything I want and need right here. And on top of that, I have the self-awareness to recognize that I am happy; lacking nothing. So I had to just say it out loud in front of my family.

That has become even more important to me as I have gotten older: If you are thinking something positive that involves another person, even at the risk of appearing dramatic or awkward, just say the thing anyway.

I suppose it goes along with the family motto my wife and I created after we moved to Alabama this year:

“Give Life Meaning and Create Beautiful Experiences”.

This phrase was born in the aftermath of me realizing more and more each year:

Most things in life that we tend to dwell on or believe are important are actually just meaningless and/or uncontrollable distractions, keeping us from focusing on the few things that actually matter.

Here during the 2nd half of the roller coaster of my expected lifespan, I came to the conclusion that I have now “deleted” most of the “apps” that used to take up space in my brain:

The outcomes of political elections, the outcomes of sports events, the news, the weather, conspiracy theories, bingeable series on streaming platforms, giving other people the ability to “offend, disrespect, or insult” me, the need to prove to myself that I am a “good person” by being overly critical of myself, the need for my personal opinion to matter to other people, the need to be “right” about anything, the need to prove another person to be “wrong” about anything, the certainty of death and the uncertainty of the afterlife… and many more familiar classics!

What’s left at this point? What “apps” are still taking up space in my brain? This is something I have spent quite a bit of time thinking about this year.

The answer:

Cultivating a home where love is obvious. Making a conscious effort to positively influence the lives of people I encounter throughout each day. Showing up, doing the work, and looking for ways to improve. Choosing to serve and trust God, since He knows what He’s doing. And just chill.

For me at least, I think that’s all that actually matters in life anymore.