Author: Family Friendly Daddy Blog

Leave a comment Posted on July 20, 2014 parenting, Storytelling

Do Your Kid’s Friends’ Parents Have “Loose” Guns In The House?

February 6, 2014 at 9:41 pm , by Nick Shell

Leave a comment Posted on July 20, 2014 marriage, parenting

That Annoying Learning Curve Of Love

February 5, 2014 at 11:10 pm , by Nick Shell

2 years, 3 months.

Dear Jack,

It was seven years ago today that Mommy and I stopped simply being friends, when I basically tricked her into going on a date with me to that fateful John Mayer concert.

Since February 5, 2007, we have been together; that day was such a defining moment in my life.

That was seven years ago! We have been married five and a half years; and you’ve been around for the past 3 years and 2 months.

In this moment, as I step back and think about it, I am so not the same person I was seven years ago when Mommy and I went on our first date.

I may have been more optimistic back then, but I definitely was much less experienced in life- therefore, I was much more naïve, by default.

Not only have I changed, but so has Mommy. The two of us have become improved versions of ourselves throughout the character-building exercises of marriage and parenthood.

We are different people than we were on February 5, 2007. The challenging part is always making sure we continue to grow up together, not apart. That’s what real love is about; it doesn’t always come easy or automatic.

Real love has required me to be more sensitive to her needs and less sensitive to mine.

A few weeks ago, I mentioned how I took that Ninja Turtle quiz on Spike.com which proved to me what I had already predicted about my personality: I am Leonardo, the aggressive, yet reluctant leader.

But I am confident that, had I taken that quiz seven, or even 5, or 3 years ago, I would have been a Raphael:

“Charming, charismatic, and very good with people… Unfortunately, you’re driven almost primarily by emotion, often to your detriment… It puts you on the defensive a lot.”

My goal these days is to be the calm-assertive leader; to not react so emotionally to emotional situations and to not take things personally… even if that’s how they were meant.

I am learning to be a stronger man. I am learning what empathy means.

If only I knew all this stuff back when I was only 26… man, I could have been so much better of a husband and dad from the beginning, had I only had this mindset since 2007.

But that’s not how it works. Instead, it’s that annoying learning curve of love.

What I am learning is that family is about growing together, which means learning the hard way together about how to become wiser, more improved, and more humbled versions of ourselves; and to earn a better understanding of what love really is:

Being more giving and sharing of myself and being less expecting of those things from others.

Love,

Daddy

Leave a comment Posted on July 20, 2014 parenting, Storytelling

A Thank You Note To God, For Balloons And A Blue Cheetah

February 4, 2014 at 10:00 pm , by Nick Shell

Leave a comment Posted on July 20, 2014 parenting, Storytelling

To Be The Victor, Not The Victim

February 1, 2014 at 9:20 pm , by Nick Shell

3 years, 2 months.

Dear Jack,

Since I graduated college about a decade ago, I’ve been having this reoccurring dream where I’m at the end of my final semester and suddenly realize there was a Tuesday morning math class I had forgotten about the whole time, which means I won’t be able to graduate college.

It’s my subconscious’s way of saying, “Hey buddy, you’re not done learning yet. School never stops. You know that, right?”

That dream has especially been creeping up for the past year and a half and I’m pretty sure I know why…

I’ve been mentioning the PHR (Professional Human Resources) certification exam I’ve dedicated all my free time to. That has been my hobby now for the past year and a half.

(And keeping up withBreaking Bad, of course.)

The PHR certification exam is basically the equivalent to the BAR exam for aspiring lawyers.

Passing that test is the next major milestone for me building my career above and beyond my current pay grade.

SO, I didn’t pass it when I took it a few weeks ago. This is the 2^nd time now. (I have to score at least 87% of the questions right- my best score was 84%.)

It wasn’t for a lack of studying and memorizing the material. But instead of blaming the organization for “making the test too hard” or tricky, I am taking full responsibility for myself.

The question is, “What can I do differently to become a victor, not a victim?”

From what I can tell, it’s a matter of “re-learning” how to learn and study; as weird as that may sound.

So I just bought two new exam study guides for the test; which are specifically designed for people like me, who study hard and learn easily, but don’t take standardized tests very well.

In other words, I’m trying a new approach to reach my difficult goal.

I’m not backing down. It’s on me to close the deal, myself. Passing this test is a lesson to teach you.

This is about you as much as it is me. I certainly have something to prove to the both of us.

While asking for help and depending on others is important, to really get somewhere in life, you have to do what it takes on your end to be the victor, not allowing yourself to be a victim of your circumstances or society.

I see life as an ongoing power struggle. Society is like a giant pyramid scheme where someone is always going to find a way to make money off of less fortunate, less creative, and/or less motivated people than themselves.

(Can you tell I’m a fan of Shark Tank?)

I want to help you climb that pyramid, but while reminding you to help others up along the way. That is the mindset I will be sharing with you… to be the victor, not victim.

Love,

Daddy

Leave a comment Posted on July 20, 2014 parenting, Storytelling

New Infographic: Learning From The Habits Of The Wealthiest People

February 1, 2014 at 3:36 pm , by Nick Shell

3 years, 2 months.

Dear Jack,

Some of the fatherly lessons you will learn from me are to never give up, to not back down on your convictions, and to be a leader.

I want you to see those concepts lived out in my everyday life. It’s in those daily routine actions and decisions of mine that I want you to see; especially in regards to how I interact regarding my love and commitment to you and Mommy… to our family.

Saying it and doing it are two entirely different things. The concept of never giving up is the backbone to being a good husband and father; the way I see it.

Even when I don’t know how to solve the problem, whatever it is, it’s a matter of dedicating myself to finding and applying the solution.

I keep that in mind with every other facet of my life as well: How much further in life can I get if I simply am more proactive that the average person in my same situation?

Instead of pointing the finger at others or even the situation itself, I have to point it at myself.

Not in an accusatory way, though- instead, it’s a call to self-appointed leadership: What can I do differently that will positively influence the people affected by the problem and proactively prevent the negative situation from occurring again?

I have to assume the role of the leader in most situations; otherwise, by default, that makes me a follower. While I may be a reluctant leader, I still am a leader- as your father, as Mommy’s husband, and as family member dedicated to increasing the income our family brings in each month.

As the book Rich Dad, Poor Dad teaches, I have to be willing to do the things the top percentile do if I want to reach the results they are able to.

For me, one important application of that means furthering my career on my own; not waiting around in hopes of getting a raise based on seniority or even my sincere efforts. In order to that, I have to delegate my free time in a way that provides me a chance of making money.

What’s going to help me make more money during my free time?

It’s like with this infographic about the habits of the world’s wealthiest people. (Click on Habits Of The Wealthiest People to see a full screen version of it.) They spend time learning each day, instead of seeking entertainment.

I am willing to make the sacrifices necessary to be one of those successful people.

In my next letter, I want to talk to you about how exactly I plan to spefically help further my career and how I’m spending me free time to make that goal a reality…

But first, I will close with the findings featured on the infographic Habits Of The Wealthiest People. (Courtesty of NowSourcing.)

They Have a Routine: Maintain a to-do list, wake up 3 hours before work, listen to audio books during commute, network 5 hours or more each month, read 30 minutes or more each day for education or career reasons, and love to read.

They are Healthy: Exercise aerobically 4 days a week and eat less than 300 junk food calories per day.

Raising Their Children: Teach good daily success habits to their children, make their children volunteer 10 hours or more a month, and make their children read 2 or more non-fiction books a month

Television Habits: Watch 1 hour or less of TV everyday.

They Set Goals: Write down their goals, are focused on accomplishing some single goal, believe in lifelong educational self-improvement, believe good habits create opportunity luck, and believe bad habits create detrimental luck.

Love, Daddy

Source: Business-Management-Degree.net

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