wedding anniversary

Leave a comment Posted on Storytelling, Uncategorized

Facebook Version: 18 Years Wedding Anniversary

I had just turned 18 years old when I graduated high school in May of 1999. I felt like an adult, because… I officially was. I felt “old enough” for my life to truly begin.

So today on my 18th wedding anniversary, I think, “Wow- I have been sharing my life everyday with the same person for as many years as I was alive when I graduated high school.”

In other words, today our marriage is officially an adult.

That’s funny… because I still barely feel, or act, like an adult myself! (I’m 45.)

Naturally, when people learn it’s your wedding anniversary, the common response is, “Oh, congratulations! That’s a big milestone.” Sometimes it is followed with a playful follow-up: “So what’s your secret?”

Well… I think I’ve got it figured out- from the husband’s point of view:

“Happy life… happy wife.”

Notice I didn’t say, “Happy wife, happy life.”

No, my secret is the opposite: “Happy life, happy wife.”

In other words, a man who is able to build and maintain his life in a way that he creates his own happiness through his own ambition and passion and curiosity, instead of putting that expectation on his wife (Example: “You complete me.”), is a man who provides the environment for his wife to therefore be happy. And perhaps even more important than being “happy”, she will feel safe and secure; as well as entertained and engaged.

A man’s life is not happy because he focuses on making his wife happy.

Instead, a man’s wife is happy because he focuses on making his own life happy; with her by his side, along for the adventure.

Now that I think of it… I’m basically the equivalent of a cruise ship director.

I would love to think of myself as the captain of the cruise ship, in this metaphor. But if I see life itself as a cruise, then I am not in control of where that ship is going- only God is.

The role of a cruise ship director, according to AI when I Google it, tells me that I am the senior ship officer responsible for all onboard entertainment, hospitality, and social programing: the public face of the ship.

Core responsibilities include event management, communication, leadership, and customer service: “acting as an information hub… ensuring a welcoming, lively atmosphere.”

Yep, that’s me. That’s what I do and who I am.

Happy life, happy wife!

That’s the secret, if you ask me.

 

Leave a comment Posted on marriage, Uncategorized

Looking Back on 17 Years of Marriage

“Seventeen years is a long time to do anything. It almost seems like longer,” my wife observed in the car ride back home this past Saturday on our wedding anniversary. We had visited Mountain Escape Spa near Chattanooga, followed up with a fancy steak dinner at The Creag at McLemore Resort, then stopped by Mentone Market for dessert.

I agreed, “At a certain point, us being married became synonymous with life itself.”

From there, I explained my fascination to her that 17 years ago, at ages 27 and 26, we surely were completely different people; as compared to the versions of ourselves we would gradually evolve into over the years.

While we certainly are much more mature and “broken in” by now, compared to 2008, I am also able to identify that despite our “personality makeovers” which took place over the past 17 years, we are still fundamentally that same guy and girl we were back when we were mostly clueless.

It is so intriguing to me that the younger versions of us instinctively understood the psychology of our attraction; that having barely dated a year before we got married, and much of that being long distance, the 2008 versions of ourselves knew we were the right match for the long haul.

Looking back through pictures of us spanning those past 17 years, I can’t help but smile. Thank God those kids followed through with their intuition. They were right about each other.

We were right about each other.

Leave a comment Posted on parenting, People, Storytelling, Uncategorized

Dear Holly: If You Were a Cat, You Would Look Like This

4 years, 2 months.

Dear Holly,

Last weekend Mommy and I celebrated our 12th wedding anniversary by visiting Look Out Winery near Chattanooga. We arrived a few minutes before they opened, and as we were making our way over to our table, which overlooked the river, we could help but notice an inviting little cat lying there on the ledge.

Mommy and I immediately both thought the same thing:

If Holly were a cat, this would be her.

She wasn’t a kitten. She seemed fully grown. However, she was more of the size of a kitten. She had big blue almond-shaped eyes.

And of course, she was very friendly, inviting, and playful.

Just like you!

Love,

Daddy

Leave a comment Posted on People, Storytelling, Uncategorized

Celebrating Our 12th Wedding Anniversary, During COVID-19, in the Mountains of Tennessee

When my wife and I were planning our wedding over 12 years ago, we strategically chose July 5th as our wedding date; as it would always conveniently be the day after a major national holiday. In other words, we knew we would always either have the day off work before our anniversary, or like this year, get a 3 day weekend out of the deal.

For the past two weekends now, we have ventured out to local wineries near where we live, nearly an hour south of Nashville, Tennessee.

We have sort of stumbled into this fun summer routine on Saturdays.

So for our 12th wedding anniversary, we drove to the outskirts of Chattanooga, about two hours from where we live, to check out both a local winery as well as a brewery.

First we visited Look Out Winery in Guild, which overlooks the river. It marked the first time we visited a Tennessee winery that was just as much a restaurant.

We loved their pizza!

After lunch, we headed down the highway about ten more miles then drove up another mountain to Top of the Rock Restaurant and Brewery in Jasper, Tennessee.

The view was amazing.

We loved it there so much that my wife already decided that is where she would like to spend her 39th birthday, coming up in about 6 weeks on August 11th.

So here’s to a dozen years of knowing I married the right woman… and to celebrating our 12th wedding anniversary during a global pandemic.

Leave a comment Posted on fatherhood, marriage, parenting, People, Storytelling, Uncategorized, Writing

After Nearly 10 Years of Marriage, My Wife and I Have Decided to Get a Dinnerware Set (Melange Nantucket Weave) to Replace Our Original One

A decade ago, I had just proposed to the love of my life. We hadn’t even been dating for a year yet, but I was already feeling at that point that my proposal was past due. That’s how much I knew she was the one.

I proposed on January 14th, and our wedding day was less than 6 months away, on July 5th. I suppose that’s just how our story goes. We didn’t need a long time together to decide to get married, nor did we require a long time to be engaged.

The entire year of 2008 is a blur to me. In early January we were just dating, and by early December, we had already been married 5 months. That really puts things in perspective now, in hindsight, what a big year that was for us.

At some point that year, my wife and I spent a day at Bed Bath & Beyond where we had registered for our wedding. When it came time to pick out the dinnerware set, she found a red set that she really liked.

Then we realized that for some mysterious reason, the same set in blue was half the price. So we went with blue.

Amazingly now, after nearly 10 years of using that dinnerware set, from Bush to Obama to Trump, and with two new smaller human members joining our family, all pieces of that set have survived other than a bowl and a cup. That even includes a move to Alabama and back.

Ten is a big number. Just a couple of weeks ago, my wife got to pick out new jewelry from James Avery for Valentine’s Day. That’s the only new jewelry she has gotten (or said she’s wanted) since her engagement and wedding rings back in 2008. So it was a big deal.

So while we’re in the spirit of my wife getting new things, in convenient accordance to our upcoming 10th wedding anniversary, we now have a brand-new set of dinnerware:

Melange Dinnerware, Nantucket Weave

It was not a rash decision. My wife obsessed over, I mean, carefully studied, dozens of sets online through the course of a week.

She then requested my opinion, as well as our son’s, to give her further direction after she had finalized her selection to the top 3.

I have learned over all these years that often, when she asks which one I like the best, whatever the thing is I’m helping her to decide, my answer only reinforces her own decision; which is never the same one I chose.

Amazingly, this time it was different.

Even though she was leaning towards another set, our son and I both chose Melange Dinnerware, Nantucket Weave, and apparently we swayed the vote!

Now obviously, with me being a man, you can imagine that in the end, my choice in our new dinnerware set was not a passionate one.

But now that the new set is here, I have to say, I am very pleased with our decision!

It’s like a crossroads of both Country and Class, which is how I think of my wife. Yeah, she’s from northern California but she loves Country music and grew up on a 5 acre farm with sheep, pigs, cows, chickens, and rabbits. She’s arguably more Southern than I am, yet I was born and raised in Alabama!

Soon, when you see pictures of our kids eating at the dinner table, you won’t see the decade old blue cups and plates anymore; as we start phasing in our white wicker-looking ones.

I never would have thought that picking out a new dinnerware set would be worth writing about, and on your end, reading about.

Yet here we are.

Now let’s see, so far this year, my wife has gotten a new set of jewelry and dinnerware. Meanwhile, I’m still driving my 2004 Honda Element that I’ve owned since January 2006.

Hey, I wonder if I will finally get my Jeep Wrangler I’ve been wishing for all these years?

Nah, probably not. Old Hondas just never die.

By the way, if you’re reading this because you are already actively looking for the Melange Dinnerware Nantucket Weave set, just click here:

Melange Dinnerware, Nantucket Weave

That link will take you straight to Amazon, where you’ll likely find the best deal on it, like we found.