A Dad’s Letter To His Son On His 3rd Birthday

November 16, 2013 at 12:23 am , by 

Three years old!

Dear Jack,

While I’ve been writing about you since the day Mommy and I went public with the fact Mommy was pregnant, back on April 13, 2010, it wasn’t until exactly one year ago on your 2nd birthday that I wrote directly to you for the first time.

I meant it as just a special, one time thing.

But I got addicted… and after that first time, I decided to officially change my format of writing about you, to where I write to you.

Exactly a year has passed since that night I sat at our coffee table and cried so hard, realizing my love for you.

Tonight, I’m less emotional in that sense. Instead, I’m feeling fully grounded in how I feel about you and how I understand my love for you.

Instead of a groundbreaking ephiphany, today I simply am grateful for the gift of peace of mind and heart; a gift the world can not give.

In this moment, that is my life. I think of that song, “On Top Of The World” by Imagine Dragons, to describe how I feel about you and me:

“I’m on top of the world, ‘ay
Waiting on this for a while now
Paying my dues to the dirt
I’ve been waiting to smile, ‘ay
Been holding it in for a while, ‘ay
Take you with me if I can
Been dreaming of this since a child
I’m on top of the world.”

For me, this year will be remembered as the year I discovered the importance of praying for wisdom, humility, and grace.

Those are three things I need every day to be the man who appreciates the priviledge, responsibility, and blessings of loving you and Mommy.

Love isn’t easy, as I’ve to written you before.

But honestly, raising you is getting so easy these days. Not that changing diapers was ever a big deal to me, but you’re transitioning your way into “big boy underwear” now, for example.

You can talk! We have conversations! Real conversations!

You can identify the difference between Fords and Chevys by looking at their logos. How cool is that?

And I definitely don’t know how you do it, but you can not only tell the difference between a Mustang and Camaro, but know whether it’s a new or an old one.

Quite impressive.

And I think, “Man, I taught you how to do that!” Our long drives to school and back everyday serve as an opportunity for me to teach you something.

I like teaching you something. I always will. That’s one of the things I love most about being your Daddy.

When I’m showing you the world, even in its seemingly most frivolous details, I feel alive and connected to the universe.

It’s like you and the universe are sort of the same thing anyway.

Happy 3rd Birthday, Son. I love you with all that I have.

 

Love,

Daddy

 

 

Finding Non-Petroleum, “Bug Juice” Free Cupcakes

Not Having A Smart Phone Is My Sabbath

November 13, 2013 at 11:17 pm , by 

2 years, 11 months.

Dear Jack,

In the midst of a dozen other bloggers at the GM and Buick headquarters last week in Detroit, it was discovered that I was the only one there who…doesn’t have a smart phone.

(Just so you know, back in the year 2013 when I wrote you this, that meant major cool points were deducted from my street cred score.)

I sincerely laughed along with my fellow blogger friends in their amazement:

“How is it that the daddy blogger of Parents.com doesn’t own a smart phone?”

We all laughed even harder when I explained to them that my “dumb phone” is brand new… I just got it like three weeks ago.

The fanciest feature my phone has is a full texting keyboard. Yeah…

But the more we talked, it made a little bit more sense to all of us: They all blog as their full-time career, whereas I have a day job in HR, in addition to blogging.

Second, I don’t know that my psyche could handle a smart phone. It would totally mess with my internal feng shui.

The thought of “being on all the time” stresses me out. I need time to mentally rest and meditate throughout the day.

In addition to driving you to school each morning (1 hour), working at the office (8 hours), then driving us back home (45 minutes), then helping with dinner and cleaning up afterwards (1 hour, 15 minutes), and writing to you (1.5 hours), it essentially means I work all day long.

What I would love is a routine, whole, solid day off each week, like the Seventh-day Adventists practice… religiously. In so many ways, I already live their lifestyle and subscribe to their doctrinal beliefs.

However, I’m not ready (if ever?) to be so literally serious about taking 24 hours off from any kind of work, as instructed in the Ten Commandments.

So until then, not having a smart phone is my sabbath.

It’s my way of having sanity throughout the day- to not have to wait and wonder who might have Tweeted me or sent me a Facebook message or emailed me.

Until I become a VIP, I will continue living with as much peace of mind as I can, not having a smart phone.

And more importantly, not having to pay for Internet on my phone when I already have it here on my $290 ASUS laptop from which I write to you.

I’m going to stop talking now, because I am losing street cred points by the minute…

[Changes batteries in Walkman Cassette player and continues listening to Collective Soul.]

 

Love,

Daddy

Born And Raised In South Detroit… Or I Just Drove Around There

November 11, 2013 at 11:48 pm , by 

2 years, 11 months.

Dear Jack,

At the risk of coming across as a “selfie” pic obsessed guy, I’m delivering what I promised to you yesterday (more pictures of my trip) in my letter entitled, “Say Nice Things About Detroit.”

You know my general rule; I basically refuse to have my picture taken these days unless you and/or Mommy is in it with me. It just seems weird for a 32 year-old dad to be taking pictures of himself and posting them on the Internet…

But a picture of myself is justified when taken with my family.

Unless… I happened to be on a scavenger hunt hosted by OnStar and Buick, where in order to get credit for each event, I needed my picture taken with the OnStar logo to prove I was actually there, then Tweet it to the judges of the competition…

In that case, I guess I look less weird… or maybe it’s just my excuse this time.

So for the scavenger hunt, the dozen or so of us bloggers needed to pair up, and then hop in either a Buick Regal or Lacrosse, and accomplish as many tasks as we safely (and legally) could within the following two hours. Each task was worth an appropriate amount of points, based on difficulty.

It was only natural that the two dad bloggers teamed up. So my buddy was Fred Goodall of the blog, Mocha Dad. We named ourselves, “Team Dad.”

Fred was clever enough to think, “Let’s just do the challenges that are worth the most points first, then worry about the other ones if we have time.”

So we did.

Given that Fred has a smart phone and I don’t, I became the driver and Fred became the navigator and researcher. It helped tremendously that our Buick had OnStar on it, so I just pressed the button each time I had a new destination, and the friendly person on the other line helped me figure out which place I was trying to go, then instantly sent the directions to the built-in GPS.

It was all a blur at the time- and it still is. Actually, all you or I have to really go on are these pictures.

So appparently, Fred and I had to do our impression of the Detroit Tiger statue. And then I blocked in a competitors’ Buick while they were getting their picture made with it.

I ended up at Fisher Theatre whereMamma Mia! was evidently the answers to one of the clues.

How did “Team Dad” know the answer to that trivia question? We happened to see “Team Mom” take their picture with the poster… that’s how!

Then there was our visit to the all new Whole Foods in Detroit, where I first learned the slogan, “Say Nice Things About Detroit.” We picked up some organic food (untainted by Monsanto) then donated it to Gleaners Community Food Bank.

No, we didn’t win the scavenger hunt.

But I know we had a lot of fun driving in our classy ride across Motor City, doing random stuff a dad doesn’t normally get to do.

Most of all, I loved getting to discover the real Detroit (not the version reported by media).

Sure, along the way, I saw the “burned out buildings,” but they were alongside new ones; with growing new businesses.

It sort of reminded me of a baptism by fire- the new life is growing where the old one has faded away.

And perhaps accidently, the folks at GM and Buick used the journey of this scavenger hunt to show me the journey that Detroit is undergoing.

I’m so serious. I proudly stand behind Detroit.

Before this trip, I just didn’t realize what was actually going on- that in reality, Detroit isrebuilding, not crumbling.

Yesterday I changed my Facebook banner to the picture of the “Say Nice Things About Detroit” mural.

Something I am very passionate about is seeing a group of hardworking people overcome hard times.

That’s literally what’s happening right now in Detroit. And since the mainstream media isn’t willing to present the real news story, I am.

 

Love,

Daddy

 

P.S. A special thanks to my fellow dad blogger and the other member of “Team Dad,” Fred Goodall, of Mocha Dad for taking the pictures of our scavenger hunt.

Say Nice Things About Detroit

November 10, 2013 at 10:09 pm , by 

2 years, 11 months.

Dear Jack,

As you know, I just got back from my 2nd trip to Detroit yesterday, to visit the OnStar and Buick headquarters.

In addition to your official souvenir (giant toy car) that you received yesterday, I’ve also brought back some more souvenirs… photos from Detroit- most of them being goofy shots of me.

However, this one, a shot of the brick wall as soon as I walked inside the new Whole Foods in Detroit…

It’s more interesting and innovative than anything; at least according to my perception of what I thought was simply a quirky phrase which could be destined to be a bumper sticker.

Thanks to Google, I learned that “Say Nice Things About Detroit” is actually the name of a novel by Scott Lasser.

However, I like to stick with my own original interpretation of the phrase…

I feel that the way Detroit has been perceived in media in recent years (I’ve made it clear before I’m not a fan ofCNN or Fox News because they’re both so ridiculously one-sided, as they cater to their appropriate uncompromising political party) is unfair to the city.

Now that I’ve visited Detroit my 2nd time, including downtown, even at night, I am so grateful to not have taken the sound bites seriously in mainstream media, when they create headlines about the sky of Detroit falling.

What helped keep me open-minded on my trip is that just two days before I took the flight to Detroit, I saw on MSN’s homepage that Detroit is currently America’s top “turnaround town” for real estate:

“Instead of sinking when the city of Detroit had just filed for bankruptcy, its housing markets took on a quiet resurgence. In the second quarter of this year it ranked seventh in the report, and this rapid jump to number one speaks volumes about its pace of acceleration.”

This is a perfect example of why I will always reinforce to you the importance of being open-minded and why I will encourage you to always question the mainstream ideas and look for the answers yourself.

Detroit is a really cool city. I actually look forward to my next trip there.

In fact, in my next letter to you, I will be sharing some more pictures of the city, from the scavenger hunt I partipated in with OnStar and Buick.

(That’s how I got this cool new t-shirt from Pure Detroit, a local culture shop there.)

Everyone I met in Detroit, in every part of it I visited, were all very friendly and optimistic.

It was almost if they were unaware of the same regurgitated “news” that outsiders are being fed.

Without any of the citizens of Detroit saying it, I literally felt it in their presence: They believe in the rebirth of Detroit.

I know I do. And by the time you’re old enough to read this letter and really process it, I’m sure the old stereotypes of Detroit will be outdated.

Now that I have visited that great city (with its really nice downtown) and seen for myself its passion to rise again, I too am passionate about not simply refraining from saying negative things about the city, but instead, about saying nice things about Detroit.

Because they’re true.

 

Love,

Daddy

 

P.S. A special thanks to fellow dad blogger, Fred Goodall, of Mocha Dad, who took the picture of the Whole Foods wall. (He has a smart phone and I don’t.)