Author: Family Friendly Daddy Blog

Leave a comment Posted on Nostalgia, Storytelling, Uncategorized

I Don’t Hate Mondays

If you knew me in high school, you may still have a vague memory of me going around the hallways during break, selling gum from my backpack. Yes, welcome to…“Confessions of a Teenage Gum Dealer”.

It was a different time back then. Gum in the classroom was strictly prohibited. I sold a good that was a true commodity. I provided a service that was risky. The free market rewarded me accordingly.

In hindsight, I apparently felt tied down by the idea of having to commit to just one group of people to hang out with in high school, so I decided it made more sense to bounce around from the skateboarders, to the athletes and cheerleaders, to the gamers playing Doom in the computer lab, to everyone in-between.

And while socially connecting with everyone at school, why not make some money in the process?

I would buy the multipacks of Wrigley’s gum from the grocery store for about a dollar, then only charge 25 cents per pack (which contained 5 sticks of gum) when I sold them at school. That meant I made over a dollar profit for each multipack. And believe me, I sold a lot of multipacks each week!

Naturally, I carried this “Zack Morris” mentality with me to college…

I bought two pairs of old microwaves and mini-fridges from Goodwill; turning my dorm room into the most glorious convenience store. I would go to Wal-Mart and buy microwaveable popcorn, ramen, egg rolls, burritos, and Hot Pockets; as well as other tempting processed foods like candy, energy drinks, and soda.

Just like in high school, running a “small business” allowed me to be socially connected while making some money along with the way. Coincidentally, I lived in Dorm 15 at Liberty University. My regular customers cleverly named my store, “The Freshman 15”; for many of them, it proved to live up to the name.

As I have recently been thinking back on those stories, it finally hit me, this year at age 43:

“Oh… I’m one of those people who will never stop working even after I retire, because if I do, I will die shortly afterwards.”

This does not bother me. Fortunately, I happen to also be one of those people who not only believes, but also lives by, the concept, ‘Find a job you enjoy doing, and you will never have to work a day in your life.”

Funny thing is, most people don’t actually know what I do for a living. Many people assume that I write for a living, or that it has something to do with making YouTube videos. To be fair, I do make a passive side income from those hobbies. (Even my hobbies revolve around me finding a way to make money off of them!)

But my actual job, ever since I graduated college, is I am a recruiter. Basically, I’m a salesman under the division of HR.

I have a monthly quota. My job is find qualified people and motivate them to be interested in one of my company’s openings that needs to be filled- and then lead them through the whole paperwork process and background reports, up unto the point of their first day of onboarding.

I love my job. I love the people I work with. I love the company I work for.

I get a thrill out of overcoming challenges and managing chaos.

Yet, somewhat ironically, I am definitely not a workaholic. I don’t think about work before 8 AM nor do I think about it after 5 PM.

I definitely never think about my job during the weekend. Yet, unlike Garfield, I don’t hate Mondays. I don’t constantly fantasize about taking a vacation. You’ll never hear me complain about my job.

So I’m pretty sure that when I eventually officially retire at some point, I’m still going to be finding ways to make money, while connecting with people.

I suppose it has something to do with me recognizing that work, especially as it relates to earning income and being able to find a way to be of service to others, not only gives me purpose but it also doubles as a much-needed distraction from the big, scary aspects about life that have no satisfying answers or perfect solutions.

There is comfort in the routine. I don’t fight it. I embrace it.

Leave a comment Posted on fatherhood, parenting, People, Storytelling, Uncategorized

Dear Jack: You are Currently about 5′ 3″

14 years, 3 months.

Dear Jack,

When we bought you new shoes to begin your 8th grade school year, I learned that you officially have a larger shoe size than me. And since then, you have continued growing taller.

I don’t think I grew after the 8th grade. I’m pretty sure I’ve been 5′ 9″ since 1995.

You were curious enough this weekend for me to measure you. Looks like you are currently a little over 5′ 3″.

But if your shoe size is already size 10, it seems like by the time you are finished growing, there’s a decent chance you will end up being at least a little taller than me.

We’ll know for sure in a few more years.

Love,

Daddy

Leave a comment Posted on book review, fatherhood, Spirituality, Uncategorized

Dear Holly: A Book about Poo… from School?

8 years, 10 months.

Dear Holly,

Last Friday Mommy made it back from her work trip to Nashville in time to help work the final day of your school’s book fair.

So in addition to all the books and other fun stuff you had already ended up with last week (basically like a small Christmas), you still had one more day to grab any items you just had to have.

The most interesting thing you came home with was, to my surprise, actually a book!

Of course, the name of the book is none other than “Where’s the Poo? Sticker Activity Book”.

Because yes, that is a real thing, and you now own it.

I can confidently say that in all my elementary school years, I never once encountered a book about poo… that also happened to be a fun activity book including “over 200 poop-tastic stickers!”

 

Love,

Daddy

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Dear Jack: Going to Church on Wednesday Nights

14 years, 3 months.

Dear Jack,

For me, being active in the youth group at my church was a huge part of my teenage years.

Of course, as soon as you started school here in Alabama, you quickly were recruited by your new friends to join the football team. And it just so happened that several of them all went to the same church.

We are there every Sunday as a family, but specifically on Wednesdays while your sister is at dance class down the road, I drive you to church.

I definitely appreciate that you want to be there with the dozens of other kids in your youth group, while I am at the men’s Bible study.

Last Wednesday as we crossed the street to the church, two of your friends ran to catch up to you: “Hey, there’s Jack!”

I was so proud. Not only do you want to go to church on Wednesday nights, but you have friends waiting for you there.

 

Love,

Daddy

Leave a comment Posted on People, Spirituality, Uncategorized

Is Being a Faithful Christian Actually That Hard?

I’m going to say something that might seem challenging and unconventional:

Being a faithful Christian is not actually that hard.

It’s just not. Jesus clearly acknowledged this: “Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me; for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light. “

Speaking from personal experience, I can confirm that choosing to live a life based on His teachings actually makes life easier, not more challenging.

I’m convinced that instead of being more restricted by the Christian principles, we are actually more free.

A major theme I see in Jesus’s teachings (as well as much of the Bible, including Proverbs) that I feel doesn’t get much attention is that this all is largely rooted in emotional intelligence:

The ability to understand, use, and manage your own emotions in positive ways to relieve stress, communicate effectively, empathize with others, overcome challenges, and overcome conflict.

Being emotionally intelligent leads to being more disciplined in regards to the 7 deadly sins (pride, greed, wrath, envy, lust, gluttony, and sloth) and from there, we are naturally more inclined to love our neighbors as ourselves; which is connected to loving God.

This is an epiphany that has became strangely obvious to me over the past year. Each morning, I start the day by taking a 3 mile walk. During this time, I pray. I start off with the most famous prayer; the one Jesus taught his disciples:

“Our Father, who art in heaven, hallowed be thy Name, thy kingdom come, thy will be done, on earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread. And forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us. And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil.”

Naturally, when you pray this, you can’t help but visualize examples of how this personally applies to you. The most challenging part of this prayer for me is “lead us not into temptation”…

This is my theory: That you can actually get to a point in your life where there just aren’t that many temptations surrounding you anymore, if you’re living your life in accordance to the ways Jesus taught us to live.

When I think of the word “temptation”, I immediately associate it with “sin”. When I think of the word “sin”, I associate it with “an act that causes a separation between you and God, as well as others”.

So for me, as a sincerely happily married 43 year-old man, what temptations am I supposedly facing?

Let’s start with the 10 Commandments:

  1. I am the LORD your God; you shall not have strange gods before me. “No problem. One God is enough for me. And I know this also implies not making anything else a god; like my job, my family, my hobbies, etc.”
  2. You shall not take the name of the LORD your God in vain. “That’s easy. I don’t even curse anyway. Nor do I use God’s name out of context. It just seems silly.”
  3. Remember to keep holy the LORD’s Day. “Definitely. I am at church every Sunday morning, then I intentionally take it easy the rest of the day.”
  4. Honor your father and mother. “Of course! I love parents!”
  5. You shall not kill. “Why would I want to murder anyone? I’ve never even been in a fight my entire life.”
  6. You shall not commit adultery. “What?! Remember, I am sincerely happily married. I don’t desire nor think about other women. I love my wife!”
  7. You shall not steal. “If I am praying for God to give me my daily bread, why would I need to steal someone else’s?”
  8. You shall not bear false witness against your neighbor. “What do I have to hide? Why would I need to lie?”
  9. You shall not covet your neighbor’s wife. “Didn’t we already do this one? Just like with only having one God, I’m good with just one woman.”
  10. You shall not covet your neighbor’s goods. “I am happy for my neighbors. Good for them. I celebrate their success. I don’t envy it.”

Still with me? Can you agree that following the 10 Commandment is simply just basic?

What about Jesus’ famous Sermon on the Mount? “Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you.”

Right. Exactly. Why wouldn’t we want to see our enemies redeemed as opposed to revenged?

But also, who are my enemies? I’m not aware that I have any. Why is that?

Now let’s look to when Jesus was asked what the greatest commandment was.

“Jesus replied: ‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: Love your neighbor as yourself. All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments.'”

Love my others as much as I love myself? I have said for years that the meaning of life is found in serving others. I am energized by connecting with other people. One of my favorite things to do is to mentor others and empower them.

And I don’t think I am better than other people either. I am overly aware I am not perfect. At any moment, I could choose to make self-destructive decisions if I was tempted to do so. It’s just that I tend to not be tempted in the first place, because “sin” just doesn’t seem interesting or appealing to me at this point in my life.

My life is more enjoyable because it is proactively directed towards pleasing God, which is based on loving other people as much as myself.

I immediately recognize and believe that I fall short of the glory of God simply by being born into this world with a sinful nature. I openly accept the gift of Jesus’s salvation for being the only perfect one.

Isn’t the whole goal of being Christian to be like Jesus? I feel like there is a paradox here:

If a person claims to be a Christian, yet continually chooses actions that go against the teachings of Christ, that person is seen as a hypocrite; to be despised.

But if a person claims to be a Christian and chooses to live faithfully in accordance of the teachings of Christ, and then claims that they just aren’t intrigued by the temptations the world has to offer, does that imply the person’s actual temptation or sin of choice is pride?

I don’t buy into that.

Instead, I believe Jesus wants us to mature in our faith to the point where temptations become quite a rare thing; to the point where we find joy in following His teachings and in serving others; all while not believing that we ourselves are greater than others and while still fully recognizing God is God and we are not.

I just don’t see what is so hard about that. Change my mind.