parenting

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Dear Jack: Your Very 1st Cell Phone (But No Social Media Accounts!)

13 years, 1 month.

Dear Jack,

You had been asking for a cell phone for the past year and a half; ever since you started 6th grade. What didn’t help your case was that you set your standards way too high: a brand-new iPhone.

Mommy and I recognized that with you apparently being the only one of your friends without a cell phone, you were by default being left out of social connections with the rest of them.

Once you finally “settled” on a new Google 3 XL that we found a really good deal on, I gave you my blessing on getting your own cell phone; given that you would not be permitted to set up social media accounts:

“You have given me every reason to trust you with this responsibility. I know you are going to take really good care of it and that you’re not going to go on bad websites.”

It helps that we have got you on Mint Mobile, which is what I am on; for just $15 per month.

After you opened your special gift on Christmas morning, you then noticed that the official color was not white like we had ordered online, but instead, “not pink”.

The actually color of your phone is called “not pink”.

Fortunately, I was able to convince you that it’s so close to white that no one will even notice your phone is “not pink”, nor is it white.

To be sure, I agreed to let you order a fun phone case for your new phone. It’s a lot less trouble and less drama than having to send back the phone and wait for a new one.

At age 13, you now have a cell phone. (But no social media accounts!)

 

Love,

Daddy

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Dear Jack: You Had No Complaints about Our New House…

13 years, 2 months.

Dear Jack,

Over the course of the past five months, our family has driven to Alabama several times to view houses for sale. Through the process, you openly announced your issues with each one we saw.

Fate would have it that the house we ended up buying last Friday was the one house that you and your sister didn’t get a chance to see.

So a few minutes after walking into our family’s new home, as the ink was still drying on the paperwork from us closing on the house, I asked you:

“Jack, what is your favorite part of our new house?”

Your response: “All of it!”

This marked the first time we visited a house that you didn’t even have one complaint about.

What a relief!

Our new house in Alabama is only 50 square feet bigger than our house now in Tennessee. However, our Tennessee house has 4 bedrooms, 3 bathrooms, and a bonus room; whereas our Alabama house has 3 bedrooms, 2 bathrooms, and no bonus room.

That means that literally every room in our new house in Alabama, including your bedroom, is bigger than our current house; even all the closets!

And your “second bedroom”, the garage, where you are often slipping away to work on your projects, has much more space for you in your Batcave/Fortress of Solitude.

So yeah, you’re going to like our new house.

 

Love,

Daddy

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Dear Holly: A Popcorn Picnic Before Breakfast

7 years, 8 months.

Dear Holly,

I had just returned from the gym at 6:30 AM, as Mommy was getting ready to go into the office for work in downtown Nashville. Before I could turn the corner to say hi to Mommy, I noticed you on our bedroom floor.

You had taken it upon yourself to set up a popcorn picnic for a couple of lucky stuffed animals.

My immediate thought was, “Yep, that checks out.”

I didn’t need any explanation. That scene perfectly sums up your playful personality.

Of course you set up a popcorn picnic before breakfast on a Tuesday morning!

 

Love,

Daddy

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Dear Jack: Your “Cat Turned Potato” Creation from Art Class

13 years, 1 month.

Dear Jack,

A week ago you walked through the door after school, nonchalantly holding your newest finished project from art class.

I was expecting a smirk from you, or at least a curious pause for me to immediately start laughing.

My obvious initial guess was wrong.

You simply explained, “I was trying to make a cat, but then its ears didn’t look right, so I tried to turn into a potato instead, but I left the legs on so it could sit up straight.”

For the past week, your “cat/potato” art creation has been placed in the center of our kitchen table.

Your sister keeps asking me to move it, as for some reason, your art creation is not providing a very appetizing dining experience.

 

Love,

Daddy

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Dear Holly: The Logistics of Your New Doll Arriving from the North Pole

7 years, 7 months.

Dear Holly,

For the past week, as Christmas Day has been getting noticeably closer on the calendar you are marking off next to your bed, you have been providing commentary regarding Naty.

She is the doll you have asked Santa for, which you are confident he will bring you.

You explained to me, “I bet she is so cold right now up in the North Pole. She may even be packed up on Santa’s sleigh already.”

Despite you also declaring that Naty is 8 years old, you also have mentioned a few times, “Her birthday will be December 25th, since that’s when I’m getting her.”

I struggle with understanding where she has been for the past 7 years if she is turning 8 on Christmas Day, but I keep questions like that to myself.

Yesterday, Mommy worked from home, as you were also here since school is out this week. Overhearing all of Mommy’s conversations about the contracts she is managing, you were inspired to write a contract for you to adopt Naty.

In just a few days, Naty will finally… be born?

 

Love,

Daddy