Jack’s Stupidest Toy Ever: The Furry Bolster Pillow

September 1, 2011 at 6:58 pm , by 

Nine months.

A couple of weeks ago while shopping at Super Target, I was standing in the baby food aisle, resting on Jack’s stroller as my wife finalized her selection.  I looked down at the shelf beside me and saw a hilarious looking, white shag carpet accent pillow.  It had obviously been abandoned in the wrong section. As I picked it up to examine the weird thing a bit closer, Jack immediately began laughing; he thought I was about to playfully ram him in the chest with it. So I did.

I should point out the that Jack loves to have random objects fly toward him and bump him, especially in the head and chest. It makes him laugh hysterically; always has.

The other reason that the sight of the pillow made him laugh was probably because it looks like the two dogs he has met in his life, one of those canines in particular reminds me of Falcor from The Never Ending Story. He has laughed at the sight of shaggy white dogs he has met, so he just associated the pillow with them.

Jack is at the age now where the kind of toy he needs most is a learning center with gears and gadgets for him to pull on. I realize that technically, that’s not how we should have spent $12 that day.  But I just had to do it.

So that was a few weeks ago and I must say, I incorporate the stupid shag carpet bolster pillow into Jack’s daily playtime- I sort of feel obligated to. Fortunately, he’s still crazy about the random, bizarre, giant rabbit’s foot.

I have this theory that some of the best toys you can buy for a baby boy are actually dog toys.  After all, isn’t this story a bit reminiscent of when I bought Jack the sock monkey dog bed when he was a newborn?

The truth is, I call Jack my “baby puppy” on a daily basis; especially when he follows me around the house with a big grin on his face.  So I throw him a bone. Well, not actually a bone, but a two foot long, somewhat awkward-looking pillow.

I’m not sure what he really thinks the pillow is.  Maybe he thinks it’s a friendly dog in the form of a cube.  Or the head of a giant Q-tip.

He’s sort of weird for liking it so much. I’m even weirder for buying it for him.

 

Little Boys Live in Their Own Little World

Bedtime Routines for Rocking My Baby to Sleep

August 16, 2011 at 10:43 pm , by 

Nine months.

Now that I’ve been a parent for nine months (as long as my wife was pregnant with our son), I have gained some confidence in finding some consistency with this whole thing. Through some quick Internet research, I taught myself how to get Jack to sleep through the night. Granted, he almost always puts up a fight when it’s bedtime, but even he recognizes the comfort of routine.

The last bit of fun that happens for him before his bedtime routine is that he gets a bath, along with plenty of attention from my wife and I.  But once I walk into the bedroom with him for bedtime, it’s all business: I don’t look at him, smile at him, touch his skin, talk to him, or feed him.  This may seem a bit harsh, but the key is to not engage him or emotionally comfort him in any way.

Comfort is only obtained by him falling asleep. Granted, I make sure he’s physically comfortable as I’m holding him and rocking him.  The room, the blanket, the tone I set; it’s all exclusive to his daily bedtime routine and naps.  It’s the only time he experiences that version of me.

Note: In the following pictures you will see me demonstrating with a Sleep Sheep, not my actual son.  The flash on the camera while he’s trying to fall asleep would have been pretty counterproductive!

My son knows that when I sit him down on his bedroom floor and he watches me unfold his blanket on the extra twin bed, I am about to pick him up to wrap him in a “baby burrito.” Or maybe it’s more like a “baby corn husk” because he likes to have his arms hanging out.

The moment I put my hands under his arms to lift him, he stands up, then leans back Matrix style facing the blanket, hysterically crying as he turns towards the bed.  I call it his “wailing wall” routine.

But sure enough, the moment I lay him down on that blanket and begin to wrap him up, he gets quiet and calms down. He lets me rock him for a minute with his head resting on my bicep (my left arm) and my right hand supporting his lower back; then he starts trying to sit up as to escape my embrace.

So I challenge him: I slightly tilt him backwards to make it harder to sit up. After he has completed three or four of what I call his “impossible sit-ups,” he’s ready to give in to my comforting strength.  Usually by that point he is officially ready to fall asleep.

To hypnotize him into a “sleep trance,” I “shoosh” him to the rhythm of the first line of “This Old Man.”  Then when his eyes close and he starts a slower breathing pattern, I switch to a “Darth Vader snoring” noise to match him. He is asleep at this point.

After a minute or so, when I can see he is in a decently deep sleep, I quickly set him down in his Graco Travel Lite crib and start rocking it back and forth like he’s in a boat at sea.  A minute later, I sneak out of the room, still making my “Darth Vader snoring” white noise until I shut the door.

If he wakes up later during the night, I wait ten minutes before going in to help him back to sleep.  The reason is that almost every time, he falls back asleep on his own.  Usually he’s just transitioning into different sleep cycles when I hear him cry for a minute or so.

It’s weird, but it’s the routine that he and I share every evening at 7 o’clock.  It used to take 90 minutes to get him to sleep and he would continue waking up every few hours to be fed again.  Now, it only takes around 10 minutes or less and he usually sleeps through the night undisturbed until 6:20 AM the next morning. That’s the power and comfort of routine.

I have to put some perimeters on the sometimes overwhelming open-endedness of life. I can’t imagine things any other way.

This has been a sequel to “Getting My Infant to Sleep through the Night,” which itself was a sequel to “Is It Wrong to Let Your Baby Cry It Out?“.

Additionally, it is also a spin-off of “There’s a Certain Comfort in Routine.”

In Flight Entertainment from Sacramento to Phoenix

Jack’s Sticky Situation: The “Do Not Remove” Tag

July 25, 2011 at 8:23 pm , by 

Eight months.

The renters that have been in our Nashville townhouse will be moving out in September; in the meantime, we are once again staying with our good friends, Dave and Karen. Last Saturday morning while Jill was making a wonderful French toast breakfast (ironically with dark German bread), I hung out with Jack on the kitchen floor. He discovered a sticker on the bottom of a chair that read “DO NOT REMOVE…”.  So of course, he did exactly the opposite.

Jack was thrilled at how easily he was able to tear off the sticker.  He wadded it up in his hands, making a ball.  But it didn’t take long for him to realize his newly acquired toy was wearing out its welcome.

What had become a cool new discovery had instantly become an annoying chore. How could he rid himself of this pesky new virus? If only he would have read the tag, maybe he wouldn’t have done exactly what it told him not to.  Jack did his best to remain calm and find a way out of this sticky situation.

He tried crawling with the sticky ball stuck on this hand, hoping it would lose its stickiness, and in the process, latch on to the floor.  But that didn’t work.

So Jack tried to convince himself that he still wanted to play with the tag.  But the look on his face told me different.

Sometimes in life, when you just stop trying so hard to do something, that is when you get exactly what it is that you want.  After all, on the night I met my wife for the first time at the taping of the CMT Crossroads episode with Lindsey Buckingham and Little Big Town, I wasn’t expecting to meet anyone.  It was just a random Thursday night in Nashville and I only went because The Office was a rerun.

Jack put the sticky label up to his mouth.  I had a choice: Either take a picture of the next part of this story, or keep him from trying to eat it.  And that is why you do not see a picture of Jack with the sticky label in his mouth.

It’s funny how if you simply have a camera and a baby, then you automatically have a limitless library of stories to tell.  Writing for The Dadabaseis just a part-time job for me.  But with all the amusing little things Jack does everyday, I could without a doubt, do nothing but just share stories of him as a full-time job.

Jack really does provide great material. What a cool kid.

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