Nostalgia

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Can We Just Be Open And Honest With Each Other? (Part 1)

December 15, 2013 at 3:49 pm , by 

3 years.

Dear Jack,

I feel like there’s this stereotype about fathers, that especially as they get older, they tend to have less of an open door policy with their sons.

And I get it.

By the time the two are both grown men, there’s almost this unspoken rule that the two can’t or shouldn’t talk to each other about serious stuff, involving the need for jpersonal advice… because they’re both grown men.

However, that’s the very reason theyshould depend on each other in that way.

For me personally, I can’t just talk toany guy friend about certain stuff.

My heart is very guarded. I know that may seem out of character for me, being that I appear to spill my guts out in these letters to you. But there’s a whole lot I keep private.

Rabbit trail here, but as I’m nearing my H.R. certification exam on January 11th, I’m planning to start focusing more time on writing songs again (which is why I moved to Nashville in the first place) because soon I won’t have to spend all my free time (which isn’t much) on studying. I can begin easing my way back into my forsaken hobby of creating music.

One of the songs I’m working on contains this line:

“I am a skeleton with meat on my bones/I walk around with secrets nobody knows.”

I think a lot of men feel that way. I think that’s why classic superheroes are so popular. Batman is the example that comes to my mind, immediately. In a way, superheroes compensate their own personal failures, fears, and insecurities by leading and helping others. It’s a great escape and a perfect distraction.

Yet still, they have received an emotional scar at some point in life that characterizes, and in some ways, defines who they are.

I can relate. I have an emotional scar or two. And I would actually be surprised to meet a man who didn’t feel that way about himself. It’s for that very reason it’s important you’ve always got other men to depend on, emotionally… or psychologically, or whatever you want to call it.

It’s not that I don’t trust other men, but  it does take a lot to make myself that emotionally vulnerable. It’s easier just to keep it inside and try to sort it out myself, a lot of the time.

I’m realizing I’ve got more to say about this than I realized, so let me put a bookmark right here. Go grab yourself a glass of water, then come back and read the rest of this letter.

To be continued…

 

Love,

Daddy

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3rd Birthday Monster Truck Road Trip: Canyon Mouth Park

November 28, 2013 at 12:13 am , by 

3 years.

Dear Jack,

Well, this is it… the final letter about your monster truck road trip in the Toyota Tundra to celebrate your 3rd birthday. I know at 3 years old, it’s hard to remember some of the details, so I wanted to make sure I did a good job of scrapbooking it for you.

The final stop of our tour was Canyon Mouth Park, not to be confused with Canyon Land Park, which my most recent letter was about.

It’s not the most glorious park I’ve ever been to, but it is the quietest and most unknown park I’ve ever been to. After driving the 13 mile trek along the side of the canyon, we had finally made it to the bottom, where Little River comes to a calm point, which is Canyon Mouth Park.

But while the place was very sirene and undiscovered… you weren’t! It was that time of the afternoon where you were needing a nap, and in the company of Nonna and Papa (my parents), you started getting pretty silly- as these pictures clearly show.

Nonna introduced you to the tickling song, “This Little Piggie,” along the way, so you were definitely ready to have some fun.

So we let you do what any 3 year-old little boy would want to do in the same situation: You threw rocks into the water until we finally had to go.

It was the perfect way to end our monster truck road trip.

We all had so much fun with my birthday gift to you (of this monster truck road trip) that I have a feeling this is the beginning of a new tradtion.

Granted, I may not be able to score something as cool as a Toyota Tundra every year, but I feel the best birthday gift I can give you each year is a road trip.

Not anything fancy or exotic; quite the opposite. Something special, personal, low-key, and ideally… free. To me, that’s priceless.

Happy Birthday Son!

 

Love,

Daddy

 

Disclaimer: The vehicle mentioned in this story was provided at the expense of Toyota, for the purpose of reviewing.

P.S. For your convenience, I am closing this “Monster Truck Road Trip” series with links to each chapter:

Dad Gives 3 Year-Old Son A Monster Truck For Birthday… Sort Of

Nashville Dad Introduces 3 Year-Old Son To Country Music

3rd Birthday Monster Truck Road Trip: Build-A-Bear

3rd Birthday Monster Truck Road Trip: Little River Falls, AL

3rd Birthday Monster Truck Road Trip: Mountain Driving

3rd Birthday Monster Truck Road Trip: Canyon Land Park

3rd Birthday Monster Truck Road Trip: Canyon Mouth Park

 

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3rd Birthday Monster Truck Road Trip: Canyon Land Park

November 27, 2013 at 11:30 pm , by 

3 years.

Dear Jack,

On the 2nd half of your monster truck road trip in the Toyota Tundra to celebrate your 3rd birthday, we stopped by an old abandoned amusement park, called Canyon Land Park, right outside my hometime in Fort Payne, AL. Here’s an old vintage postcard of the place in its prime:

In the likeness of the Dharma Initiative on Lost, this random amusement park thrived from around 1973 to circa 1983; until the place shut down. It even had a skylift that went over the canyon as well as a mini zoo featuring exotic animals!

Canyon Land Park has remained virtually untouched for 30 years.

The only exception I know of was exactly 20 years ago in October 1993, when my church’s youth group rented out the old (creepy) facility for a Halloween, for something called Hell House. (A Christian version of a spook house.)

One of the reasons I wanted to stop by the place is because exactly 40 years ago, Nonna and Papa (my parents) went on one of their first dates there.

It made sense to include what’s left of Canyon Land Park as part of this monster truck road trip, as it obviously had something to do with you and me even being here in the first place.

Turns out, there wasn’t a whole lot to see, as we parked the truck outside the rusted barb wire fence. I was able to make out what used to be a putt-putt golf course, but that was about it.

For all I know, there are black bears and wild hogs living in those old brick buildings that at one time brought in thousands of tourists. Maybe one day someone will purchase the land and make it the seemingly awesome and unique amusement park it once was.

I wish there would have been more to show you there, but at least the event served its purpose: to go off the beaten path in a “monster truck” and make an adventure of some things in life that most people don’t get to see every day.

We still had one more final stop on our monster truck road trip, though.

To be continued…

 

Love,

Daddy

 

Disclaimer: The vehicle mentioned in this story was provided at the expense of Toyota, for the purpose of reviewing.

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A Purposely Low Key 3rd Birthday Party

November 17, 2013 at 10:57 pm , by 

3 years old.

Dear Jack,

For your last two birthdays, Mommy and I didn’t keep things simple.

We combined both friends and family to have an official birthday party, each time.

Even though our “family life” is so much more stabilized and easier than it was for the past two years, without giving it much thought, perhaps by default, Mommy and I decided to have a purposesly low key(!) birthday party for you.

So we did things a bit off beat…

First, on Saturday, the morning of your birthday, we had your first and best friend over, with her parents.

As this picture collage that Sophie’s parents made illustrates, you two had plenty of unscripted fun.

My favorite part to witness was when Sophie suggested, “Come on, Jack. Let’s go upstairs!”

So we all trekked up to your boy cave.

I’ve mentioned before, we have the top half of a rockasan in your bedroom that serves as a “boat.” You and Sophie had a great time giving each other rides in it.

And somehow, even though I was only feet away, I missed the moment when Sophie ended up with the toy basket on top of her head.

Of course, after lunch, both of you were in need of a nap, so the celebration came to an end, but not before we all had some of Mommy’s yummy vegan cupcakes!

After Sophie left, we aimed for a nap, which I think ended up turning into us watching part of Monsters, Inc. that Sophie got for you. (You now own your first Disney movie!)

Then later in the afternoon, we had two more of your friends up with their parents, and essentially repeated what happened earlier that day.

It wasn’t until just now, as I put these pictures together, that I realized only girls came to your birthday party.

(Your friend Troy was out of town and couldn’t make it, by the way.)

So it made it that much funnier that in the goody bags we gave to them, each friend received a Hot Wheels pick-up truck.

Yes, and that’s pretty much your 3rd birthday party. Of course, we’re going to spend next weekend with my family to celebrate your birthday with them… and I have a special surprise being shipped in from Atlanta… or I should say, driven in…

You’ll see what I mean in a couple days!

(Plus, I just have a feeling that to be so mellow about your 3rd birthday party, we will end up making up for it with your 4th birthday party.)

 

Love,

Daddy

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A Dad’s Letter To His Son On His 3rd Birthday

November 16, 2013 at 12:23 am , by 

Three years old!

Dear Jack,

While I’ve been writing about you since the day Mommy and I went public with the fact Mommy was pregnant, back on April 13, 2010, it wasn’t until exactly one year ago on your 2nd birthday that I wrote directly to you for the first time.

I meant it as just a special, one time thing.

But I got addicted… and after that first time, I decided to officially change my format of writing about you, to where I write to you.

Exactly a year has passed since that night I sat at our coffee table and cried so hard, realizing my love for you.

Tonight, I’m less emotional in that sense. Instead, I’m feeling fully grounded in how I feel about you and how I understand my love for you.

Instead of a groundbreaking ephiphany, today I simply am grateful for the gift of peace of mind and heart; a gift the world can not give.

In this moment, that is my life. I think of that song, “On Top Of The World” by Imagine Dragons, to describe how I feel about you and me:

“I’m on top of the world, ‘ay
Waiting on this for a while now
Paying my dues to the dirt
I’ve been waiting to smile, ‘ay
Been holding it in for a while, ‘ay
Take you with me if I can
Been dreaming of this since a child
I’m on top of the world.”

For me, this year will be remembered as the year I discovered the importance of praying for wisdom, humility, and grace.

Those are three things I need every day to be the man who appreciates the priviledge, responsibility, and blessings of loving you and Mommy.

Love isn’t easy, as I’ve to written you before.

But honestly, raising you is getting so easy these days. Not that changing diapers was ever a big deal to me, but you’re transitioning your way into “big boy underwear” now, for example.

You can talk! We have conversations! Real conversations!

You can identify the difference between Fords and Chevys by looking at their logos. How cool is that?

And I definitely don’t know how you do it, but you can not only tell the difference between a Mustang and Camaro, but know whether it’s a new or an old one.

Quite impressive.

And I think, “Man, I taught you how to do that!” Our long drives to school and back everyday serve as an opportunity for me to teach you something.

I like teaching you something. I always will. That’s one of the things I love most about being your Daddy.

When I’m showing you the world, even in its seemingly most frivolous details, I feel alive and connected to the universe.

It’s like you and the universe are sort of the same thing anyway.

Happy 3rd Birthday, Son. I love you with all that I have.

 

Love,

Daddy