Daddy, We Should Pour Soda Over The Heads Of The Bad Guys

March 9, 2014 at 8:19 am , by 

3 years, 3 months.

Dear Jack,

Friday morning as we were on our way to school, sitting at the red light, you looked over and saw what you assumed was a tanker truck delivering gas to the gas station.

“Actually, that’s a soda truck. Soda makes people sick. It’s not healthy for people to drink it,” your health nut dad explained.

Your immediate response:

“Daddy, we should pour soda over the heads of the bad guys.”

Now, maybe if an outsider somehow heard that conversation, they might suggest it’s a prime example of a parent brainwashing their child.

I don’t know, though. I don’t know if it’s common knowledge that drinking soda leads to diabetes (type 2), like it is common knowledge in our family. Fortunately, Diabetes.org recognizes this on their website:

“The American Diabetes Association recommends that people should limit their intake of sugar-sweetened beverages to help prevent diabetes. Sugar-sweetened beverages include beverages like: regular soda, fruit punch, fruit drinks, energy drinks, sports drinks, sweet tea, and other sugary drinks.”

Plus, I don’t know if this is common knowledge either, like it is for our family, that diet sodas are no better for a person who is trying to avoid cancer or disease. Even WebMD doesn’t outright deny or dismiss these claims:

“The most recent headlines have raised concerns that diet sodas boost stroke risk. Diet and regular sodas have both been linked to obesitykidney damage, and certain cancers. Regular soft drinks have been linked to elevated blood pressure… Observational studies like these can point to possible concerns, but they can’t prove that sodas do, or don’t, pose a health risk.”

But over time, like smoking cigarettes, regularly drinking soda is the sort of like playing Russian roulette.

The way I see it, it would be an act of mercy to pour soda over the heads of the bad guys. Better on them, than in them.

Honestly, I would be very upset if I found out that someone let you drink soda when I wasn’t around. That would be extremely offensive to me; even if you only had a few sips.

Aside from the overdose of sugar, and the mysterious chemicals, there’s also the caffeine to take into consideration.

Caffeine is the mostunregulated, psychoactive drug in the world; not to mention it’s addictive. An article from The Journal Of Young Investigors: The Premier Ungraduate Science Journal puts it this way:

“According to a study conducted by New Scientist magazine, 90% of North American adults consume some form of caffeine on a daily basis, making this legal, psychoactive substance the world’s most widely used drug.”

As for you, you just drink water all day, then almond milk with dinner.

Soda is not for drinking. It’s for pouring over the heads of bad guys; at least, according to you it is.

You’re nicer than I am, though. Again, I think making the bad guys drink that stuff would be a lot worse.

 

Love,

(Your health nut) Daddy

 

Top image: Shutterstock, Evil Soda.

Bottom image: Shutterstock, Soda Cans- Sugar and Caffeine.

I Survived A Year Of Being A Vegan, Part 2

March 8, 2014 at 12:34 am , by 

3 years, 3 months.

Continued from Part 1

Dear Jack,

A few weeks ago, I pitched an idea to an infographics company about creating an infographic regarding the the rise of veganism; specifically explaining how Netflix documentaries have contributed to this movement in America.

My goal was to have something to back up this letter, in advance, for my one year vegan anniversary; which is obviously today. To my surprise, they actually used my idea!

Even better, before I could even type this letter, I found that this “Rise Of Veganism” infograph that I pitched and contributed to, was already showing up on my Facebook feed from other people.

I take that as a major compliment that I could be involved in creating something that people are sharing right now on Facebook and Twitter.

(Good word gets around, before I can even get the chance to spread it myself, in this case.)

So I finally took a minute to actually check out the findings of this infographic.

Son, it turns out, I’m one in a million after all… literally.

There are now about one million vegans in America, or 2.5% of the population. This infographic shows that only 21% of us vegans are male, only 11% of us follow a major religion, only 33% are not political, and only 10% of us are raising our children to be vegan.

Those findings tell me that I’m the minority among the minority: Of that 2.5% of American vegans, I am a non-political, religious male parent who is raising his son as a vegan… or at least mostly vegan.

Clearly, I do not fit the stereotype. I realize now, that makes my veganism stand out even more in the crowd. Oh well, I’ve been living outside the box my whole life; I’m used to it.

Like I’ve been saying this whole time, I have no desire to convert anyone else; nor did anyone pressure me into it a year ago.

Yet, the conversions are still happening. That’s obvious, considering that the number of vegans in America has more than doubled in the past 3 years. There’s something that’s contagious about the “vegan gospel” and, for lack of a better phrase, the alternative lifestyle that accompanies it.

It has nothing to do with social pressure. In fact, it’s the opposite of social pressure. In my opinion, being a vegan is one of the most outright rebellious things a person can do in our society.

Especially if you’re a guy, who is supposed to like meat and potatoes. (Or specifically in my case, as a Southerner, of Italian and Mexican heritage… then it would be fried chicken, pepperoni, and queso.)

Your daddy is a non-politcal, religious vegan. Yep, that’s me all right, the perfect rebel.

 

Love,

Daddy

Note: This is an opinion piece of the author and does not reflect Parents magazine or the medical establishment.

 

Veganism
Source: TopRNtoBSN.com

I Survived A Year Of Being A Vegan, Part 1

Just The Mention Of A New Sibling Makes My Son “Remember”

March 6, 2014 at 10:02 pm , by 

3 years, 3 months.

Dear Jack,

It’s interesting how sometimes you magically forget how to do such daily tasks:

“Mommy, help me eat my applesauce. I forgot how…”.

Of course, you especially love to forget how to clean up after yourself after playtime. I contrast this against the fact you always do such a great job of putting away your toys and puzzles when I pick you up from school each day.

You never need your teacher or me to tell you to do so.

Meanwhile, back at our house, not only do Mommy and I have to tell you, but we have to tell you a lot.

This past weekend as I was doing the dishes, Mommy asked you to put away your toys before getting ready for bed.

“Mommy, I don’t know how to. I forgot how to pick up my toys,” you announced.

Mommy responded, “Jack, do you want a brother or sister? That way they can help you pick up your toys?”

Immediately, you began cleaning up your toys. You didn’t even bother answering Mommy. It was one of the quickest clean-ups you’ve ever performed.

How did you so instantly remember how?

It seems as if the thought of a baby brother or sister getting to play with your toys is a bit troubling for you. As Mommy and I regularly (half-jokingly?) ask you if you want to have a brother or sister, your reply is typically the same:

“I want a poodle. A pink one. Or a brown one. Or maybe a hedgehog.”

So lesson learned. The next time you “forget” how to do something, I guess we’ll have to “remind” you, now that we know how.

There’s no guarantee you’re going to be an only child, you know. I’m just as curious as you are about what will happen over the next few years.

There’s also no guarantee we could definitely have another child if we decided we want to, so I don’t take that for granted. However, it’s interesting to see how you’re already reacting at just the mention of another sibling.

The “only child” in you is showing.

 

Love,

Daddy

 

I Keep On Waiting For The World To Change

March 6, 2014

3 years, 3 months.

Dear Jack,

I assume there are certain milestones in life where a man must come to terms with the things he can not control. That’s how I feel right now.

This past week I decided to go back and watch the footage of the September 11th attacks. I was a 20 year-old in college back in 2001 and I haven’t watched footage of those events since then… in over a dozen years. 

After watching a couple of documentaries on Netflix and YouTube this past week about that footage, I just didn’t know how to feel.

I was confused, paranoid, and disillusioned as I saw the events from a now enlightened perspective the second time around.

Finally, I understand the subtle message in John Mayer’s 2006 #1 hit, “Waiting On The World To Change”:

Now if we had the power
To bring our neighbors home from war
They would have never missed a Christmas
No more ribbons on their door
And when you trust your television
What you get is what you got
Cause when they own the information, oh
They can bend it all they want
It’s not that we don’t care,
We just know that the fight ain’t fair
So we keep on waiting
Waiting on the world to change

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oBIxScJ5rlY&feature=kp

I am still sorting through all this, but I am coming to terms with it. You too will encounter moments like this in life.

You will realize there are complex problems in the world so much bigger than you are and that you have no control over them. You decide that maybe sometimes, the less you understand, the better.

I guess that’s where I am now.

You can only ask so many questions before you sometimes realize you may not want to know the answers.

As I remove my focus from why there are wars and terrorist attacks and so many innocent people involved in the process, I instead turn my thoughts to you and Mommy… in gratitude.

All I can do is be grateful for our family.

I could easily allow myself to be overwhelmed with life and death and the version of the news that is reported on TV, by both liberal and conservative networks, and all the fear and uncertainty that go with those things; or I can allow myself to live in simplicity… in a small, simple world.

What I can do is try to be the best father to you and the best husband to Mommy…

And as for the rest of the world, all I can do is try to be the best neighbor I know to be to each person I encounter.

Those are the things I will be accountable for at the end of my life when I answer to God; as I firmly believe we all will be someday.

Maybe somehow, that is simply how I do my part to help change the world.

When I read about Jesus, I never read about a man who was trying to be a political leader. Many of his followers wanted him to be, but instead, he was a man with a radical message of peace and hope, calling the people to bring the kingdom of Heaven to earth as opposed to continuing to raise hell on earth.

Of course, as the late comedian George Carlin pointed out, evidently people weren’t ready to hear a message about living in harmony and trying to love each other; because like Gandhi, Abraham Lincoln, Martin Luther King, Jr., and many other respected leaders of peace, Jesus was put to death.

I hope and literally pray that one day, enough of my generation, and yours, will see the other version of history that I’ve now been clued in to. Maybe then, I could stop waiting for the world to change.

 

Love,

Daddy