Nick Shell

Leave a comment Posted on Uncategorized, Writing

The Most Popular (and Favorite) Posts of 2009

It’s been a big year for Jenny Slate, and for some reason, pickles. After writing over 250 posts this year, I now present the best 25 of them which readers unknowingly chose as the Most Popular and Favorite of 2009.

When I have a stream-of-consciousness thought, I write down a rough draft title for it on a slip of paper which later becomes a page and half long post. Sometimes these subjects I write about magically connect with readers. But I can never know which random topics will fly or land. I just throw them out there and see what happens.

Since September, I have been exclusively publishing my writings on this site, which provides built-in technology that shows me which posts are clicked on the most. Therefore I can determine which are the Most Popular of 2009.

The Top Most Popular Posts:

Jenny Slate Will Not Be Fired for F-Word Accident-

Without exception, this post makes an appearance every week in the Top Posts section of my site. Though the mishap took place a few months ago and is no longer entertainment headline news, there are still curious people out there finding my article through Google searches. It’s so popular that twice as many people have read it than the #2 post.  http://wp.me/pxqBU-5W

 

Pickles Make for Good Reading Material, Episode 3-

How would you waste $50,000? There are, of course, plenty of annoying and limited rules placed on this question. http://wp.me/pxqBU-26

Pickles Make for Good Reading Material, Episode 4-

What if you could only eat free restaurant food for the rest of your life? No more of Mom’s lasagna or double fudge brownies. http://wp.me/pxqBU-4o

Paranormal Activity Vs. The Fourth Kind-

My review of two thriller movies was taken to a whole new universe when a random “alien abductee” left an out-of-this-world comment at the bottom of the post. http://wp.me/pxqBU-dL

New News-

The human race is hungry for new information. But we tend to settle for celebrities making fools of themselves and infomercials that promise a cure for male hair loss. http://wp.me/pxqBU-3L

 

 

#8 (tie) Boyspeak-

This Manspeak spin-off/prequel became quite popular thanks to a friend who advertised the post on her facebook wall to her thousands of facebook friends. This post confronts the fact that many men never grew out of their “own little world” mentality from when they were boys. http://wp.me/sxqBU-boyspeak

#9 Manspeak, Volume 7: Bromance-

It’s pretty obvious that bromantic comedies outsell romantic comedies these days. But bromance isn’t anything new; it’s been around since Biblical times. http://wp.me/pxqBU-3W

#10 (tie) The Invisible Touch, Yeah (The 2nd Installment) –

What causes us to become close to certain people but not others?   http://wp.me/pxqBU-20

#10 (tie) Big Hands-

For some people to be wealthy, it means that others must be poor. This post takes a look at what things would be like if America was neither. http://wp.me/pxqBU-6l

For the slight majority of this year, my posts were exclusively published on facebook. I wasn’t able to have a clue of how many people read them. All I had to go on were comments people left. Therefore I deem these most-commented-on writings the Favorites of 2009.

The Top Fifteen Most Favorite Posts:

Snail Trails- If I’m the only person who remembers something happening, I hold the exclusive rights to that event actually being real. http://wp.me/pxqBU-a

The Opposite of Evolution- A scientific explanation of how the Earth was created by God in 6 literal 24 hour days. Intelligent Design 101. http://wp.me/pxqBU-1a

Red and Yella Will Kill a Fella- Flashbacks from the Snake Man and how his words of wisdom also apply to fast food. http://wp.me/pxqBU-l0

Manspeak, Volume 9: Appearance- The episode introducing the term “Bachelor Pants”.
http://wp.me/pxqBU-6f

Barley Into Beer- Comparing beer to soda, from a Christian perspective.http://wp.me/pxqBU-2L

The Funny Thing about Jews- The Hebrew people make up less than 2% of the US population, yet dominate American entertainment. A brief look at some of the actors you didn’t realize were Jewish. http://wp.me/pxqBU-kY

Robes Man- How a robe makes any man more sophisticated and at the same time a bit creepy. http://wp.me/pxqBU-kR

The Magically Disappearing Friend- They only exist in our minds. http://wp.me/pxqBU-kV

Dog Whistle- What does God think about his name being on our dirty money? http://wp.me/pxqBU-lc

Story of My Life- Why I can remember such amazing details. http://wp.me/pxqBU-kC

Party Like It’s 1999- Ten year reunions can actually be awesome. http://wp.me/pxqBU-kJ

Hedge of Protection and Travelling Mercies- Analyzing our goofy-worded prayers. http://wp.me/pxqBU-kM

Hungry Heart- We will never get over our selfish past of life in the womb. http://wp.me/pxqBU-kN

My Jewish Upbringing- Seriously, I’m not really Jewish? http://wp.me/pxqBU-i6

Campfires- As kids, we knew how to hang out with our friends. It’s gotten more complicated as adults. http://wp.me/pxqBU-3

Like an actor who is blinded by the stage lights and is therefore unable to see the faces in the audience, I can not see who the people are that read my writings each week. But whoever you are, I thank you. Thank you for sharing my weirdness. Takes one to know one, yes?

Honorable Mentions:

No Pork on My Fork- We don’t eat possums or vultures, but we do eat pigs and shrimp.
http://wp.me/pxqBU-jO

The Modern Day Tortoise- Working hard vs. working smart. http://wp.me/pxqBU-kP

Most of Life is Just Simply Showing Up- The rest really is just details.http://wp.me/pxqBU-kf

1 Comment Posted on People, Storytelling, Uncategorized

Manspeak, Volume 4: Stance

Man Mode: When men hang out with each other, it tends to involve competitive or action oriented activities like playing sports, hiking, running, watching sports on TV, and playing video games. The men are side by side. The activity itself is the focus; the social element of it is secondary. Eye contact is not important.

Woman Mode: When women hang out with each other, it tends to involve socially orientated activities like shopping, going out for coffee, attending their children’s school activities, and participating in various types of clubs (like book clubs, for example). The women are sitting and/or standing across from each other. The social element itself is the focus, the activity is secondary. Eye contact is important.

Opposites attract. But how do a man and a woman hang out together- in Man Mode or Woman Mode?

The Man Mode Approach: Obviously a man and woman who are constantly competing with each other and never looking at each other, more focused on something else other than each other, will not find any sort of genuine intimacy. But it could be a good way for them to hang out without crossing the line between friendship and romance. [failure]

The Woman Mode Approach: When a man is ready to cross that safe line of “just friends”, he plans a Woman Mode activity with the woman. One that involves an across-from-each-other instead of side-by-side sitting, emphasis on eye contact and conversation. It typically involves dinner. Dinner in a restaurant with low lighting. [success]

Why is it romantic to have to strain to read the menu? It’s not. But a dark environment causes a person’s eyes to dilate. When we look into another person’s eyes and the other person’s eyes are dilated, we tend to be attracted to the other person. The reason- when we are interested in something or someone, our eyes tend to dilate. So if we look into a person’s eyes that are dilated, we assume the other person is mutually attracted to us.
http://www.bodylanguageexpert.co.uk/what-do-dilated-pupils-mean.html

While compromising and meeting in the middle of issues is so important in sustaining a healthy romantic relationship, it does not apply to this specific situation. The answer isn’t to split the time spent 50/50 between Man Mode and Woman Mode. It’s pretty cut and dry: A man must convert to Woman Mode when he’s with a woman, otherwise he is conveying to her that he’s just looking for a buddy. Same thing with sustaining the romance. Otherwise she may end up feeling like he’s just not that into her.

In one of the greatest comedies of all time, Dumb and Dumber, there is a scene where Harry (Jeff Daniels) explains the reason for his recent break-up. Harry tells Lloyd (Jim Carrey) that his ex claimed he never listened to her and as he puts it, “some other stuff too but I wasn’t really paying attention”. There is a reason this example is so relatable and not too much of a stretch. Often when men are spending time with women, they forget to flip the Switch. The Switch from Man Mode to Woman Mode.

A man is focused on something already (anything on TV) and the women speaks. No response. Because the woman said something that didn’t relate to the current activity. Therefore breaking the rules of the Man Code. If she would have commented on the baseball game, she would have received an excited response. But instead, her words vanished into thin air. He is in Man Mode.

This is where it takes a deliberate awareness on the man’s part to keep in mind that he is in the same room with a woman. He has to make a very conscious effort to change over to Woman Mode. When he fails to flip the Switch, he ends up treating his object of affection like one of his buddies. Which causes his sweetheart to feel neglected.

Men are very focused creatures. So focused that it can be a little frustrating to get them to focus on something else. They have to be reminded sometimes they’re in Man Mode and that it’s time to switch to Woman Mode. If a man is interested in a woman, he will communicate and spend time with her in Woman Mode. Sometimes he forgets and temporarily slips back into Man Mode. It happens. He may need a gentle reminder every so often.

The Mode Communication Theory by Dr. Nick Shell:

Woman + Woman = Woman Mode
Man + Man = Man Mode
Man + Woman = Woman Mode

All pictures with the “JHP” logo were taken by Joe Hendricks Photography:

Blog- www.photojoeblog.com

Website- www.joehendricks.com