poetry

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“Fort Payne, Alabama” – Song 3 – Enneagram 6 Songwriter – Analyzing Lyrics – Themes of Belonging and Security

My 3rd song is a clearly a prime example of me, unknowingly at the time, showing my true Enneagram 6 identity: focused on belonging and security.

Released on October 29th, 2019, it had been nearly a decade since one the most monumental events of my life: My wife and I had moved back to my hometown on Fort Payne, Alabama; with our newborn son, without jobs, hoping and praying that our leap of faith and our new life would work out.

It didn’t. We last 9 months before we had to move back to Nashville, in humility.

This song was me accepting, in hindsight, that though I had moved back to my hometown because I saw it as a place of stability and security, it ended up being the opposite for me.

The irony, all these years later, is that my wife and I can easily work for home; wherever “home” happens to be. We could move back to my hometown again now and it would probably be fine.

However, because of living through that in 2010 and 2011, I now feel more stability and security where I live now in Tennessee.

Here are the lyrics:

“I was born and raised in Fort Payne, Alabama – Baptized and saved in Fort Payne, Alabama – I tried to move back years ago but it wasn’t quite the same – Time had moved too fast or slow and I couldn’t keep the pace – I moved out, I moved on, I found a new place to call home – But those Alabama back roads still show me where to go – I married a girl from northern California – Where they make the wine and they grow those big Sequoyahs – We planted our roots in Tennessee and we started a family – If you said this was my fate or fortune I think I would agree – I grew up in the southern Appalachians – Between Desoto Falls and Little River Canyon – If you called me Mother Nature’s son, I’d take it as a compliment – I’d trade a Lexus for an RV, a mansion for a tent – I spent the first 35 years of my life trying to know who I should be – All these puzzles pieces here, it’s more than I need – There’s a difference between who I used to be – Versus who I am now when I’m back in this town – Is this still the same place? Maybe I’m the one who’s changed”

So looking back on this song I wrote nearly 4 years ago, can you see the Enneagram 6? Can you see my longing for security and confirmation of my own existence?

Feel free to leave a comment. I’d love to hear your thoughts!

And now you can listen to the song, below, if you wish:

 

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“Tripping on Existence” – Song 2 – Enneagram 6 Songwriter – Analyzing Lyrics – Themes of Belonging and Security

In my 2nd song, we see an official embracing of the “counterphobic” aspect of my Enneagram 6 personality; identifying as a person who faces my fears, instead of running from them. Specifically, I am disassociating myself from the general population of people who I realized I no longer needed to give my time, energy, money, emotions, and attention to.

It was me officially and knowingly beginning my journey of emotional intelligence.

I recorded this song on October 28th, 2019. At that point in my life, both my salary and my wife’s had doubled; as we had both began working at different employers.

We had recently paid off all our debts and moved into a brand-new, bigger house in the perfect neighborhood. For the first time in my marriage and career, we were not in debt.

These events triggered an “existential crisis”, which I am still working through. Since then, I have felt like I suddenly climbed to the top of Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs pyramid.

Granted, much of my identity will always be wrapped up in “love/belonging”. But ultimately, I have been living in the “self-actualization” phase for a few years now.

The lyrics of “Tripping on Existence” serve as a clear realization of my sudden introduction of my existential crisis- or as some would say, “mid-life crisis”:

“Hi, I don’t care, thanks – I unplugged from existence, at least the version from before – I switched of the breaker – I don’t care if I’m hated, or even worse ignored – I wish I was here – I’ve been gone too long, I’ve begun to disappear – I can’t relate – I’ve seen too much, this is my escape – The best way to explain this: I’m tripping on existence – A dream inside a dream – An alternate dimension – I guess that I should mention – You can borrow my spare key – I am phoning home – But years have passed, now the number’s changed – So what happens next? Expect a reboot, then get born again”

So looking back on this song I wrote nearly 4 years ago, can you see the Enneagram 6? Can you see my longing for security and confirmation of my own existence?

Feel free to leave a comment. I’d love to hear your thoughts!

And now you can listen to the song, below, if you wish: