Storytelling

Leave a comment Posted on parenting, Storytelling

I Keep On Waiting For The World To Change

March 6, 2014

3 years, 3 months.

Dear Jack,

I assume there are certain milestones in life where a man must come to terms with the things he can not control. That’s how I feel right now.

This past week I decided to go back and watch the footage of the September 11th attacks. I was a 20 year-old in college back in 2001 and I haven’t watched footage of those events since then… in over a dozen years. 

After watching a couple of documentaries on Netflix and YouTube this past week about that footage, I just didn’t know how to feel.

I was confused, paranoid, and disillusioned as I saw the events from a now enlightened perspective the second time around.

Finally, I understand the subtle message in John Mayer’s 2006 #1 hit, “Waiting On The World To Change”:

Now if we had the power
To bring our neighbors home from war
They would have never missed a Christmas
No more ribbons on their door
And when you trust your television
What you get is what you got
Cause when they own the information, oh
They can bend it all they want
It’s not that we don’t care,
We just know that the fight ain’t fair
So we keep on waiting
Waiting on the world to change

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oBIxScJ5rlY&feature=kp

I am still sorting through all this, but I am coming to terms with it. You too will encounter moments like this in life.

You will realize there are complex problems in the world so much bigger than you are and that you have no control over them. You decide that maybe sometimes, the less you understand, the better.

I guess that’s where I am now.

You can only ask so many questions before you sometimes realize you may not want to know the answers.

As I remove my focus from why there are wars and terrorist attacks and so many innocent people involved in the process, I instead turn my thoughts to you and Mommy… in gratitude.

All I can do is be grateful for our family.

I could easily allow myself to be overwhelmed with life and death and the version of the news that is reported on TV, by both liberal and conservative networks, and all the fear and uncertainty that go with those things; or I can allow myself to live in simplicity… in a small, simple world.

What I can do is try to be the best father to you and the best husband to Mommy…

And as for the rest of the world, all I can do is try to be the best neighbor I know to be to each person I encounter.

Those are the things I will be accountable for at the end of my life when I answer to God; as I firmly believe we all will be someday.

Maybe somehow, that is simply how I do my part to help change the world.

When I read about Jesus, I never read about a man who was trying to be a political leader. Many of his followers wanted him to be, but instead, he was a man with a radical message of peace and hope, calling the people to bring the kingdom of Heaven to earth as opposed to continuing to raise hell on earth.

Of course, as the late comedian George Carlin pointed out, evidently people weren’t ready to hear a message about living in harmony and trying to love each other; because like Gandhi, Abraham Lincoln, Martin Luther King, Jr., and many other respected leaders of peace, Jesus was put to death.

I hope and literally pray that one day, enough of my generation, and yours, will see the other version of history that I’ve now been clued in to. Maybe then, I could stop waiting for the world to change.

 

Love,

Daddy

 

Leave a comment Posted on parenting, Storytelling

To Bring Another Child Into This Uncertain World

March 6, 2014.

3 years, 3 months.

Dear Jack,

I promise you that the next letter I’ll write will be undeniably positive and light-hearted.

But for now, I’m working through something in my head and I feel that I can’t really move forward until I write it down for you to read one day.

This is the kind of letter I don’t intend for you to read until you’re old enough to read/and or watch The Hunger Games; which contains the mood and similar content as this letter.

The irony here is that I just tucked you in for the night a few hours ago, as we said our bedtime prayers; an unspoken way of saying, “Don’t worry, I will help protect you.”

It’s my job to give you assurance of safety and to be your mighty guardian. There is no doubt I will

protect you with my life as it is up to me. Yet I myself am caught in a current emotional state of… insecurity, for lack of a better word.

For the past week, I have been studying the “alternative version” of the 911 attacks as presented in the documentary Loose Change, on both Netflix and YouTube.

It pointed out some things I had never considered before: I admit there is no clear footage of the plane hitting the Pentagon, nor pictures of it happening either. I can’t explain that. I’ve actually lost sleep over this and several other aspects of the September 11th attacks, as presented in Loose Change.

However, I believe in hearing both sides of the story. So I’ve also recently been w

atching the clever rebuttles of Myles Powers as well, on YouTube, which help me feel more confident that the claims of Loose Change are not as easily factual as they appear.

I don’t know for certain what to think right now, but I will keep studying both sides of the story. I want the truth in such an uncertain world; where the Twin Towers were hit by planes back in 2001, and just a couple of days ago, a plane from Malaysia apparently just disappeared in flight.

So I admit, my head is a bit messy right now; and to be honest, I probably shouldn’t be writing to you tonight. Maybe I should have just taken the night off because I’ll probably later regret my vulnerability here.

As Mommy and I continue to peripherally have to the ongoing conversation of “should we have another kid?”, this general concept keeps coming up as one of the reasons to possibly let you remain an only child:

There is so much evil and uncertainty in this world, so why bring another human life into that sort of existence?

Maybe it’s an irrational thought, but I think that question itself shows not so much my insecurity as a parent, as it does my deep, ongoing need to feel like I must protect you at all times, which I know I can’t.

However, you’re my son. I feel like I’m supposed to have all the answers. Or at least be able to keep you from all harm and danger.

I want you to believe I’m Superman.

But really I know I’m just Clark Kent.

 

Love,

Daddy

Leave a comment Posted on parenting, Storytelling

I Haven’t Said Anything Controversial In A While…

March 6, 2014 at 9:33 pm , by 

3 years, 3 months.

Dear Jack,

Last week at work, I had a conversation with a co-worker named Matt, who has two small kids.

I was telling him how, the longer I’m a parent, the mellower of a person I am becoming. In other words, stuff is just bothering me less compared to the way it used to.

To my surprise, he agreed- he can also personally relate. We acknowledged that whether it’s gaining more patience, or a greater ability to not allow annoying things to bother us, the journey of being parents has broken us in, for the better.

Over three years ago, when I become a parent, I was a much more out-spoken, polarizing person; especially in regards to the world of social media… especially in relation to politics and religion.

Well, that has definitely gradually changed over the past couple of years.

For example, I no longer care to publically share my political affiliation (or disassociation). I feel that public political conversations divide people; causing them to believe that by putting blind faith into a certain political party, that there’s hope that “the other side” will be converted into an opposing belief system; therefore “getting America back on track.”

I’m so over that. I can’t change people’s political beliefs. Plus, I don’t want to be labeled (and limited) to just one side.

All I can do is hope to change the world through my behavior, which (hopefully) proves the validity of my beliefs in the first place.

Having learned that, I’ve realized that same concept applies to parenting issues which I had previously debated with other parents about.

Like the “cry it out” method, attachment parenting, and circumcision…

I used to be so quick to allow myself to get involved in public online debates over those issues. These days, I strive to not take, or present, the bait.

And really, I haven’t said anything controversial in a while…

Granted, I’m still constantly thinking out of the box, and open-minded to concepts that many people might question.

But now, I’m handling these situations differently than I would have six months or even a year ago:

Has anyone else seen the documentary “911: In Plane Site” on Netflix (will be removed on March 15) or on YouTube in its entirety? If so, will you send me a private message including your thoughts on it? I am asking for a private message response (not a comment) because I am attempting to avoid starting a comments war on my wall, in which I appear as a divisive host or commentator, or am labelled as a conspiracy theorist. I am not seeking controversy; only private answers to help sort out some confusion I’m having. Thanks.

I still like to engage people, and learn from others, but not at the risk of being polarizing. So I’m more discreet and more private about my questions and concerns regarding the world and the people who live in it.

It’s my opinion that the chaotic process of parenthood has forced me to focus on what really matters.

I have gotten to the point where I don’t feel the need to have to explain myself to other people if they find out my point of view and disagree with it. What’s the point in defending your beliefs to someone who is not open-minded to hearing them anyway?

Instead of controversy, I’m seeking the collaboration of ideas with other people.

I seek truth, not simply believing I’m right.

Being a parent has peripherally taught me to focus more on how I can become a better person withthe help of other people; not how I can try to make other people better against their will or conviction.

It’s trained me to not let things bother me like they used to. I don’t know if this necessarily makes sense to other parents, but it’s definitely how I feel.

Parenthood is a humbling process.

 

Love,

Daddy

Leave a comment Posted on parenting, Storytelling

How To Take Good Pictures Of Your Kid

March 6, 2014 at 8:08 pm , by 

Leave a comment Posted on funny, parenting, Storytelling

Mommy, I Don’t Taste Chocolate In My Ravioli…

March 4, 2014 at 8:37 pm , by 

3 years, 3 months.

Dear Jack,

Yesterday Mommy prepared some vegan ravioli for you for dinner.

It was a bit of an experiment, since you usually get cheese in your ravioli. But this time, it was vegetables and garlic instead- no cheese.

Mommy and I were both curious to see how you would react to veggie version…

You have this habit, like most 3 year-olds, I assume, of trying to negotiate how little “real food” you have to eat, so that you can end your meal with some kind of treat.

As Mommy placed the ravioli on your plate, she jokingly mentioned that there was chocolate inside the ravioli.

It was amazing how we didn’t have to keep prompting to eat your dinner. For 20 minutes, you ate your ravioli with no complaints.

Then finally, you politely observed, “Mommy, I don’t taste chocolate in my ravioli…”.

Mommy and I immediately burst out in laughter. We realized at that moment, you didn’t understand Mommy was joking when she mentioned that there was chocolate in them…

You were so eager to eat chocolate for dinner, that you kept eating the veggie raviolis in hopes that you would discover some hidden chunks of chocolate to make it worth your while.

Even funnier is that you would willingly eat vegetables mixed with chocolate, if it meant you got to eat chocolate. As for me, at least, I would want them separate.

Not you. For you, chocolate is chocolate.

While the story doesn’t end with you getting chocolate chunks in your ravioli, it does end with you getting chocolate almond milk, as well as, some vegan gummy bears.

You were happy and so were your parents.

Plus, Mommy and I were happy because we got you to eat veggie-stuffed ravioli without any complaints.

If only this plan were repeatable…

 

Love,

Daddy