When Real Life Feels More Like Purgatory

September 20, 2011 at 8:22 pm , by 

Ten months.

“Purgatory is the condition or process of purification or temporary punishment in which, it is believed, the souls of those who die in a state of grace are made ready for Heaven.” -Wikipedia’s definition of “purgatory”

I’ve never actually met anyone who truly believes in purgatory, yet I feel that the general population is familiar with the idea of it.

On the final episode of Lost, the people from the Island who had ultimately lived their lives for the goodwill of others instead of greed and selfishness, reunited and reminisced in purgatory before entering Heaven together.

For those who are not Lost fanatics but like the band Coldplay, in their song “42,” some of the most memorable lyrics include the refrain, “You thought you might be a ghost; you didn’t get to Heaven but you made it close.”

Most of us don’t believe in the actual place, but for me at least, there is something pretty fascinating about the concept. I think it’s so easy in this life, in this culture, in this country, to feel like we are lost, or at least that we don’t belong wherever “here” is. We want to think that we deserve to transcend this lowly and boring situation, asking the question:

“What am I supposed to learn from this? Why am I here?”

My life has been filled with stretches like that. Even right now, my wife and I are having to adjust back to the busyness of our full-time jobs in Nashville, this time with a kid; which is a completely new balancing act for us. We are having to figure out and work out our new lifestyles and schedules, making time not only for the three of us, but for the two of us, as well.

It’s a purification process that is not easy; but it is necessary. We can see how natural it can be to let your kid consume your leftover energy and thoughts, slacking on making conscious efforts to keep the marriage relationship fresh and engaging. But we don’t want our lives to end up like Everybody Loves Raymond.

Ultimately, we are being forced to mature our marriage relationship. This “forced maturity” is sort of the whole point of purgatory. You suffer until you overcome.

Not that I am constantly immature or naive, or maybe I am (?), but I am always needing to grow in a way that I never could have without entering my newest purgatory.

But really, the more I think of the literary device we know as purgatory, the more it just seems like a straight forward yet abstract way to describe life itself; the condition or process of purification or temporary punishment in which, we are made ready for Heaven, at best.

We may figuratively compare our lives to hell at times, but really, hell is an eternal end; it’s never-ending loneliness and destruction. Purgatory is temporary.

I don’t mind viewing life as purgatory. Until I pass on in to the afterlife, I will always have much more growing up to do, more necessary suffering, and one more level of maturity to reach- even if I live to be 80.

Ouch, Jack! That Really Hurt! Jack Bit Me!

September 19, 2011 at 7:49 pm , by 

Ten months.

Jack officially has 8 teeth; not little white bumps starting to grow through his gums, but he literally has teeth. They really sprouted up so quickly.

It’s fun to feed him Cheerios because he’s like a baby pirana or maybe even Pac Man, knowing the exact moment to chomp (!) down on his food.

I couldn’t help but think of the most viewed non-commercial YouTube video ever: “Charlie Bit My Finger!.“

Admittedly, I am not daring enough to stick my finger in Jack’s mouth to see how hard he will bite down. But my wife, Jill, is.

Having seen the “Charlie” video, she stuck her finger in Jack’s steel trap, and sure enough, Jack knew right away what to do:

“Ouch, Jack!”. Just like Charlie, Jack started giggling. He thought it was pretty hilarious each time Jill did it, until her finger hurt too badly; and that didn’t take long.

Do baby boys come preprogrammed knowing that painfully biting someone’s finger is universally funny?

I’m thinking so. It reminds me of the way that babies like to “accidentally” drop food and/or toys off their high chair repeatedly, looking down at the floor until a cooperative adult picks it up for them.

Babies are funny. But it’s not always that they actually understand why what they did is humorous.

Evidently, a ten month old boy can comprehend that hurting a family member is funny. No blood, no fowl.

 

The Monetary Value of a Parent

Like Teaching a 10 Month Old New Tricks

September 16, 2011 at 7:06 pm , by 

Ten months.

My wife and I accidently taught our son Jack to do something weird this week. We taught him to “be a chicken.” Sort of.

For most of his life, my wife Jill has done this bit routine with Jack where she rushes up to him, acting like a mutant chicken. His typical response has always been to start hysterically laughing when she does.

But this past Wednesday night when Jill pretended to be a chicken, Jack decided he wanted to try to be a chicken too. He started opening his mouth really wide, hoping the “bahk, bahk-bahk-bahk” sound would come out. But it didn’t. So he just simply kept opening his mouth and closing it in the hopes that a chicken sound would magically be there.

To make this situation more hilarious, Jack has also been doing this new move where he smiles real big and shakes his head “no” as if to say, “I can’t believe these crazy people in front of me…”. It somehow remains me of Morgan Freeman playing the character of God in the movie Bruce Almighty.

Well, for the past couple of days now he has been combining his “no” move with his attempt at being a chicken. We should be teaching him things like how to pick up Cheerios with his index finger and thumb. Instead, our son can act like a silent chicken who is disapproving, yet very happy about it.

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