Nostalgia

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Higher Paid Working Wives, Increasing Househusbands

May 4, 2012 at 12:33 am , by 

17 months.

My wife makes more money than I do. Not to mention, her job carries incredible insurance and benefits for our family.

While that would have been weird for my dad in the Eighties, here in the 2010′s it’s not so unusual. I recently read an article on CNN Money that spelled it out for me:

“In 2008, 26% of women living in dual-income households had annual earnings that were at least 10 percentage points higher than their spouse, up from 15% in 1997, according to the Families and Work Institute’s latest data.”

The article went on to say that daycare costs continue to increase while wages are not increasing.

So it only makes sense for those wives and mothers out there who are worth more financially than their husbands, in a household where it is is more financially suitable for one spouse to stay at home, that the dad becomes a “househusband” instead of the mom becoming a “housewife.”

How do I feel about this, as a lesser income-earning dad?

Personally, we couldn’t quite survive on just my wife’s solid income. But if we could?

Heck yeah. I wouldn’t hesitate at all to be a stay-at-home househusband. Of course, I’m under no illusion that it would be a breeze.

Stay-at-home parents are working parents; as every politician’s wife should know.

It’s just that as a modern dad, I by default am already extremely involved in raising my son on a daily basis. To me, I would view it as a career upgrade; especially psychologically.

Beyond all the formerly-ironic-but-now-cliche dad skills like being able to change my son’s diapers and feed him, I already consider myself his main disciplinarian, sleep trainer, and nutritionist; all of which are very important when caring for a toddler all day long.

And for everything else, I could figure it out. I’m proud of the fact my wife can make more money than I can. It’s cool that her employer sees what she’s financially worth; which again, is more than I am.

Most importantly, I want to spend as much time as I can with my son. He’s awesome! Why wouldn’t I?

I always want to have a close, well-communicated relationship with him. It starts now.

If this were the 1950′s, I would evidently be able to provide enough income for my family; my wife wouldn’t have to be a working wife.

I would come home each day and smoke a pipe while wearing a robe, sitting in my cozy chair, reading over the newspaper while halfway paying attention to my son.

That doesn’t even sound at all appealing to me. I’d rather it be this way, where I’m definitely an active and positively influential dad.

“Househusband” is not an insult; I say it’s an honor and a privilege. But even if I’m not fortunate enough to be one myself, being a dad in the 2010′s still rocks, like a T-Rex playing an orange electric guitar.

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Do All Little Boys Naturally Know To Make Car Sounds?

May 1, 2012 at 12:02 am , by 

17 months.

If it has wheels, Jack has to get his hands on it. And when he does, he always imitates a motor sound: “Vvvrroooo…”. Not to mention the sounds of screeching tires every couple of seconds.

But where did he learn this? Not from me.

The first time he picked up a toy with wheels and rolled it across the floor, he knew to make motor sounds. It was as if that knowledge were incepted into his brain.

Sure, it’s very possible he learned to do this at daycare.

However, my wife has talked to other fellow moms whose sons don’t attend daycare and still made “car sounds” the moment they started playing with their first toy car.

So I wonder: Do all little boys naturally know to make car sounds?

A couple of weekends ago, we were at Walmart (which for us, is extremely rare and random) and Jack started running toward a toy display. Without hesitation, he picked up a black and burgundy street racer; the kind of car you’d see featured on The Fast And The Furious 7 or whatever sequel they’re up to now.

“You want that car, Jack? That’s a cool-looking one.” I looked at the “roll back” price of 88 cents. “Yeah son, we’ll get you that car.”

Jill and I both seemed to have this fun parenting moment as we headed over to the check-out counter and realized, “Hey, our boy likes cars now. We’re officially at that stage.”

As you can see in the picture below, he’s really proud of his very first Hot Wheels car.

He dines with it: One hand holds the spoon while the other holds the toy car. He takes it with him whenever we leave the house. He even sleeps with it; clenched tightly in his hand,next to Elmo.

It’s amazing how many “battle scars” that car already has on it. You would think he ran it through gravels, the way the paint is already etching off.

If I’m lucky, by Christmas he’ll be ready for one of those awesome Hot Wheels racing tracks where we can find out which of his cars are really the fastest and the most furious.

Naturally, car sounds will be made by both father and son.

 

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When Jack Met Elmo: A Bromantic Comedy

April 27, 2012 at 11:33 pm , by 

17 months.

It all started when my wife Jill made up a bedtime song for Jack, which featured that famous furry red monster on Jack’s diaper.

From there, Jack  started asking for Elmo by name; though his pronounced version sounded more like “M’elmo.”

Jack has a plush alien toy that he halfway assumed was Elmo (featured above), but I wasn’t able to put that off very long. Once that proved to be a bust, Jack started falling asleep  in his crib while holding an Elmo diaper; the kind featured below.

Plus, whenever he saw a pictures of frogs in a book, though he knew the actual word frog, he started citing them, “Elmo?”

We decided it was time to buy him a small, simple, licensed Elmo doll. But actually finding one proved to be as about as difficult as finding aTickle Me Elmo during the Christmas of 1996.

You would think finding a simply plush Elmo doll under 10 bucks would be pretty easy. Nope.

Last Sunday afternoon we travelled to Walmart, Babies “R” Us, and Target. While they did have the 9 inch tall Grover as well as some yellow mohawked version of Telly for $7.99, none of the stores had Elmo!

Thanks to Amazon.com, Jill was able to find Elmo for double the proper price, by the time shipping was thrown in.

I’ll go ahead and say it: We became “those parents” during the three days it to took for Elmo to arrive.

It was the kind of material that would have made for yet another clever episode of the flawless TV show, Up All Night.

Throughout the Elmo anticipation, Jill would text me updates on where Elmo was at that moment:

Jill: “The tracking # shows Elmo is leaving Sarasota today!”

Me: “Wow! That’s great news. Can’t wait to see Jack’s reaction…”

I kept reminding myself of the possible reality that when the “real Elmo” finally arrived, Jack might not be that impressed.

Well, it’s only been a few days since the moment Jack officially met Elmo (featured right) and I think it’s safe to say that we made a solid $15 investment.

After all, Elmo already has a spaghetti sauce stain on his eyes. Jack has to be holding Elmo at all times in the car, during meals, and in his crib.

So, how will Jack and Elmo’s bromantic friendship flourish? Well, just keep an eye on how many pictures in upcoming Dadabase posts feature Elmo somewhere in view.

That’s how we’ll know.

At this point, I don’t believe Jack really understands why he’s supposed to love Elmo so much; but if for no other reason than to appease his hip parents.

He just goes along with it.

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The Bookworm In My Back Seat

April 25, 2012 at 11:11 pm , by 

17 months.

Jack loves reading. In other words, he loves looking at the pages of a book for the purpose of identifying the animals so that he can make their appropriate sounds.

The book he is currently obsessed over isThe Beginner’s Bible; a children’s cartoon version of the stories in the Bible. Why does he insist of reading it all the way to daycare and back everyday? Because he’s just that spiritual of a toddler? Or…

To practice his animal sounds.

A couple of minutes into the car ride each day, I hear “Sssssss…”. That means Jack sees a picture of Satan, as a serpent, tempting Adam and Eve with the forbidden fruit.

Five minutes later, it’s “Bzzzzzz…”. Yeah, that’s the Seven Plagues on Egypt; the gnats and lice to be exact.

I’ll hear various spurts of “Pffffttt…”. That would be Jack’s very impressive impression of what a camel sounds like: There are plenty of random pictures of men riding camels throughout the book.

Eventually I hear “bah-bah,” Jack’s version of a donkey, which means Jesus is making his triumphal entry into Jerusalem… on a donkey, of course.

And then for the rest of the book, there aren’t so many animals anymore; mainly just bearded men in robes talking to each other.

Each time Jack gets to this point, he just starts laughing.

It took me a solid week to figure out what was so funny. I’m pretty sure it’s because Jack has never seen a man in real life with a big bushy beard.

So he’s laughing at the brown sheep’s butts on men’s faces. Or, beards, as we recognize them in the non-cartoon world.

Yes, my toddler son leads his own Bible study twice a day in the back seat of my car. Technically.

Welcome to Back Seat Baptist Church.

 

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My Son’s Linus Van Pelt Stage: Carrying Around His Blanket

April 23, 2012 at 9:34 pm , by 

17 months.

Jack’s blue “snowman blanket” from Target has been his main blanket since he was born, but now it has earned a regular spot in his daily toy rotation.

It’s not so much of a security blanket, since we won’t let him leave the house with it unless he’s sleeping somewhere else that night.

Instead, it appears to be a fun toy that doubles as a sleeping aid. As a toy, Jack can carry it around for the purpose of being able to play Peek-a-Boo with us at any given moment… repeatedly.

And should he wear himself out in the process, which tends to eventually happen around nap time, he likes to abruptly fall down on the blanket and pretend to sleep.

Granted, Jack won’t actually fall asleep on it. He is simply communicating to me that he is ready for me to take him upstairs to put him in his crib. That leads to a 10 minute “cry it out” session before he’s out cold for a predictable 40 minutes.

It’s a curious thing that he sleeps a solid two hours each weekday at daycare, but how we’re lucky to get two 40 minute naps out of him during the daytime on weekends.

Yesterday was the exception. He slept for 2 hours and 49 minutes; for no particular reason.

We thought we were being sneaky trying to get away with watching an episode of Lost while he napped (it was the one where Hurley finds the VW bus).

But we made it all the way through it, then started the next one, then my wife fell asleep for an hour while I started watching a documentary on Netflix about the life of people who have made a living by being extras in movies, called Strictly Background.

Nearly three hours. I called it a “grace nap.”

It’s a gesture of grace for us the parents; giving us an unexpected break from the typical routine of his. It’s our son giving us the opportunity to be bored; a rare privilege for parents of a young child.

Start noticing on Facebook, about once a week, a status update from a fellow parent joyously proclaiming that their kid slept for a period of time longer than expected. The grace nap is pretty much a big deal.

At least for me, the fact that my son carries around his blanket like Linus from Peanuts is more than just cute; it’s a beacon of hope.