Author: Family Friendly Daddy Blog

1 Comment Posted on movie reviews, parenting

Boys And Their Superheroes (Like Captain America, For Example)

April 5, 2014 at 12:50 am , by 

3 years, 4 months.

Dear Jack,

A few hours ago I was able to be among the first to see Captain America: The Winter Soldier.

As I was getting ready to leave after dinner, you sincerely asked, “Hey Daddy, can I go with you tonight to see Captain America?”

I wish I could have said yes…

But while you were definitely ready for The Lego Movie, I think Captain America is a bit much for a 3 year-old.

Again, I really wish you could have gone with me tonight. Let’s give it a few more years…

So I guess one of the reasons I write these daily letters to you is so that you can actually know your dad.

I don’t want to be a mysterious man to you.

With that being said, you need to know that Captain America is my favorite comic book character.

He was actually the first comic book action figure I ever had. That’s right- in that picture you’re holding an original 1984 Captain America from your daddy’s childhood.

I was three years old when that toy was made… you just happen to be three years old right now, as well.

Why do boys like superheroes so much, anyway? I’m sure there have been great books written and documentaries made regarding this very topic.

For me, I would say there is a subtle, understood message that boys (and men) have an alter ego in mind to help motivate them. They are looking for opportunities to be heroes in their world.

I’ve mentioned before that one of my roles in this life is that I am a reluctant leader. I think it’s interesting that many superheroes start out as average size, like me.

At 5’9″ and 142 pounds, I am clearly the epitome of what a superhero should look likebefore he gets his super powers.

But then, something awesome happens and the character in the story becomes larger than life and saves the day.

Personally, Captain America is my favorite because while he’s a bit old-fashioned, he truly cares most about doing what is right; particularly in regards to defending the freedom of America.

That’s why I loved Captain America: The Winter Soldier.

He realizes that the particular government agency he works for is so good at policing the world, that they actually become a threat to the liberty of the American people… in a 1984, Big Brother kind of way.

And Captain America doesn’t like that, so he rounds up enough people to do something about it.

In other words, it’s pretty much the most Libertarian movie I’ve ever seen; definitely more so than The Lego Movie or Ghostbusters.

Here in a few years, you will be getting old enough to enjoy watching comic book superhero movies with me.

I so look forward to that. And Star Wars too.

We are wired to be the underdogs that save the day; even if it’s just Mommy’s day instead of the entire world’s.

Boys and their super heroes. I totally get it. We’re going to have a great time in a few years with this stuff. But I’m not rushing you.

You’re three years old. Right now, I want you to enjoy the benefits of not being age appropriate to see a PG-13 rated movie.

 

Love,

Daddy

 

Leave a comment Posted on marriage, parenting

Before I Met Your Mother: Flashback To 2005

April 3, 2014 at 9:10 pm , by 

3 years, 4 months.

Dear Jack,

Until last night, I had never seen a full episode of the popular TV show, How I Met Your Mother.

But after hearing all the hype about the final episode that aired this week, I decided to check out the first couple of episodes on Netflix.

It’s interesting because the first episode flashes back to the year 2005, when the protagonist and narrator was 27 years old and meets the woman he wants to marry… and sort of ultimately begins to chase for 9 seasons.

Seeing the show took me back to a place in my life when I was that single 20something year-old guy without a wife and child.

It’s such a different state of mind.

Yes, there was so much “freedom” back then, yet I clearly remember that deep yearning to meet the love of my life, who would in essence connect me to a universe in which the world made better sense to me.

For me, the year 2005 was when I moved to Nashville to truly “start my adult life” as a 24 year-old single guy.

A year later, I met Mommy. Less than two years later, she and I got married. About two and a half years after that, you were born.

To me, this current version of my life is the one I would pick every time.

I know it could be said that raising a 3 year-old boy is at times, chaotic.

But one of my roles in our small family (and in this world as a whole) is to help organize chaos.

It’s as if I find safety and security in the structure of chaos, because it brings meaning to my life.

There are so many things I can’t do well. And there are many obvious roles in our family that Mommy handles.

As for me, I’m here for “everything else.” That’s what I’m good at. I’m starting to fathom that now.

That includes getting rid of spiders for Mommy. That includes being the official disciplinarian for you. That includes me being consistently positive for the two of you even when I don’t feel like it.

I bet it’s hard to imagine me any other way though, right? Before I met your mother, I was a lost boy.

You and her changed that for me. I like 2014 a lot better than 2005.

 

 

Love,

Daddy

Leave a comment Posted on marriage, parenting

Mommy Handles Our Schedule And Budget… We Just Follow

April 3, 2014 at 7:46 pm , by 

3 years, 4 months.

Dear Jack,

This morning as I was dropping you off at school, you wanted to go over to your friend Avery’s daddy and ask him if Avery could hang out with us this Saturday for the free puppet show at the Nashville Library.

He was delighted you asked, as was Avery. His response: “That sounds like fun. Well, let me check with the ‘schedule keeper’ in our house, Avery’s Mommy, and we’ll let you know tomorrow.”

A few minutes later, you asked your friend Madison’s daddy the same thing. His response: “Yeah, we’d like to do that. Let me check with the person in our household who handles our schedule and we’ll see.”

Earlier this week, I was texting my friend Dave about going to see Captain America: The Winter Soldier on opening night.

Before texting me back, you guessed it… he checked with the “schedule keeper.”

Sort of like how I recently pointed out that it’s common knowledge that the modern dad does the dishes every night (or a staple household chore of similar value), I’ve observed another sign of a happily married father:

He quickly admits he doesn’t control his schedule.

So, when I’m asked about plans, I know just what to do: I refer that person to Mommy.

You and I both are just along for the ride.

Even as I’m the one driving our family around in the car on the weekends, I never really know where we are going until we’re loading up. Seriously, that’s how it is.

That’s okay by you and me. Wherever we end up, we seem to always have a good time.

And really, it’s the same way with our budget. Mommy handles that for our family.

When I want to purchase something, like tickets for Captain America: The Winter Soldier, for example, I run it by Mommy.

It’s not necessarily that I have to ask permission, per se, as it is I… collaborate with the CFO first (Chief Financial Officer).

Whether it’s the schedule or the budget, I’ve learned that pretty much, the answer is yes, but I don’t ultimately make that call independently.

Mommy and I play different roles in our household. I don’t have to worry about planning out our schedules or doing the budget. I do other stuff, which I plan to write to you more about next.

Like I said shortly after Mommy and I got married nearly 6 years ago:

I wear the pants in the relationship… but she tells me which ones to wear.

 

Love,

Daddy

Leave a comment Posted on parenting, Storytelling

Today Is April Fools’ Day And I’m Not Even Kidding… Seriously

April 1, 2014 at 5:48 am , by 

3 years, 4 months.

Dear Jack,

For the past two April Fools’ Days in which I’ve been writing to you, I have participated in the tradition of trying to be tricky.

Back when you were 1, I pretended like I was trying to get you on the TLC show, Toddlers And Tiaras.

Last year when you were 2, I acted like we were going to stop being a “plant-based” family.

What I learned from the past two years is that unfortunately, most people took me too seriously. So in essence, it wasn’t funny.

That was supposed to be the point, to be funny by tricking people, yet it wasn’t really fun… to confuse so many people like that.

So this year, I’m not trying to be funny or trick anyone.

Instead, I’m the guy that’s giving out a “courtesy reminder” to everyone I know to expect April Fools’ pranks from everyone else:

Courtesy reminder: It’s April Fools’ Day.

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The interesting thing is, more people thought that me warning everyone of April Fools’ Day pranks was funnier than the actual pranks that were meant to be funny the past couple of years.

In other words, sometimes it’s easier to be funny when you’re not actually trying to be. I think you can relate.

Well, at least some of the time, you can relate.

You’re at a point now where it’s getting difficult to know when you’re trying to be funny and when you’re funny without realizing it.

Like this past weekend as I sat you down on a clothing shelf at the Gap outlet while I looked at pants. You stood up, seeing the mannequin above you, stook out your hand, and asked, “How do you do?”

And on the way home from school last week, after we passed a few farms on the road back to our house, you decided, “Daddy, I want a horse and a donkey. Then if the donkey runs away, I can ride the horse and go find the donkey.”

The funny thing is, Mommy coincidentally bought you a “free horse riding lesson” Groupon the same day.

Now that’s funny. Or is it?

 

Love,

Daddy

 

 

Leave a comment Posted on parenting, Storytelling

My Son Talks To Strangers, Part 3: The Kohl’s Incident

March 24, 2014 at 8:04 pm , by 

3 years, 4 months.

Continued from Part 2: The Talking Dog.

Dear Jack,

I remember a few months back, I read an article on Parents.comthat said one of the best ways to handle a child who is having a meltdown is todistract them.

So that’s exactly what I did this past weekend when we were at Kohl’s.

You were checking out the toys and came across a track for your Monster Jam trucks.

After asking both Mommy and me separately if you could get it, and we both individually told you maybe for your birthday (in November), you decided to ask a lady that works at Kohl’s.

She jokingly said yes.

Let’s just say you had a difficult time accepting the fact that a stranger’s confirmation on a $30 toy does not override your parents’ decision.

The story continues with me carrying you out, from the very back corner of the store and you crying loudly the whole time.

Fortunately, fate would have it that right next to Kohl’s, there just so happened to be a construction crew, building… something.

It doesn’t matter what it was, though I will say it reminded me of Level 8-3 of Super Mario Bros.

What does matter is that it was solid entertainment for you: a cement mixer, a crane, ladders, men in construction hats, smoke and dust.

You stood on the light pole (with me a couple feet behind you) in reverence of the real life Bob the Builder event happening right before your eyes.

My plan had worked, much better than I anticipated, actually.

Shortly afterwards, Mommy walked out of Kohl’s and met us in the parking lot, then we drove around the corner to Whole Foods to buy groceries.

I knew it wouldn’t be a good idea for you, having just had a meltdown, to be placed in a shopping cart in a grocery store.

So Mommy suggested you and I grab lunch while she shopped in the other side of the store.

Another miracle, from my fatherly perspective at least, was that there were some musicians performing there right next to our table in the Whole Foods cafe.

(Well, I guess it wasn’t that much of a miracle; after all, we do live in Nashville.)

I was able to teach you how to clap after each song ended.

That article on Parents.com (“10 Ways To Handle Your Kid’s Tantrums“) was right- the art of distraction really goes a long way. Fortunately, this past weekend, there was a lot to distract you.

All because I’ve taught you to talk to strangers.

 

Love,

Daddy

 

P.S. Read the entire Talking To Strangers series:

 Part 1: The Dishwasher Man

Part 2: The Talking Dog

Part 3: The Kohl’s Incident