February 16, 2012 at 7:06 pm , by Nick Shell
Storytelling
Is Your Kid’s Car Seat Installed Properly? New Study Says “Maybe Not”
February 6, 2012 at 8:58 pm , by Nick Shell
14 months.
Despite how much I truly love my son with all my heart, I may be putting him in danger everyday. But how?
Well, it’s just that I’m not completelyconvinced I installed my son’s car seat properly into my car. I mean, I think I did it right, but now I’m not so sure.
I know I can take my car to any fire station and a firefighter can show me how to correctly strap our son’s car seat into my car. Yet I haven’t got around to it.
To be perfectly honest, I feel kind of ashamed and embarrassed going to the big strong firefighter so he can help out this seemingly pathetic dad who can’t even put his own son’s car seat in the right way.
In other words, I’ve been letting pride get in the way of my son’s safety. Smart trade-off, huh?
Last week, a study was released showing how more than 30% of parents do not enforce the rule of booster seats when their kids are with another driver and that 45% of parents do not require their young kids to use a booster when they’re driving other children who don’t have booster seats.
While I can’t relate to this yet because my son is only 14 months old, I obviously am feeling guilty and responsible about it now. So I finally called the fire station, which is conveniently right around the corner from where I work, and scheduled an appointment with a licensed expert to inspect my work.
Soon, I can be assured that my son is safely strapped in his car seat. Finally, despite my pride.
It turns out, my wife went to high school with Jennifer Rubin, the Public Education Officer and Safe Kids Certified Child Passenger Safety Technician Instructor for the Cosumnes Fire Department in Elk Grove, CA.
So I was curious about what she had to say about this topic. Here is the wisdom she has to share with us today:
“A recent study showed 84% of car seats inspected had a critical misuse. I wish car seats were easy, but it is hard for parents to know they are getting the best information.
When people become parents, they often go to their own parents for advice. Grandparents can help you with how to get your baby to sleep, what your toddler should eat, potty training and more, but unfortunately they can’t help you with car seats.
Car seats and car technology have changed so much in recent years that you have to be up to date with the latest technology. Even your friends with school-age children may not have the best information.
Make sure you have the right car seat for your child, for your car and for your family. Take the time to find a local car seat tech to help you at safekids.org.
Motor vehicle crashes are the leading cause of death for children ages 3-14 in the United States. Car seat safety is worth your time!”
So I’ve established that I might be a statistic. What about you? Is your child’s car seat properly installed? Do you know for sure?
Image: Safety belt, via Shutterstock.
Can You Really Trust Your Kids With Random Strangers?
February 5, 2012 at 9:47 pm , by Nick Shell
14 months.
Last July when we moved back to Nashville, some coworkers heard that our son Jack was enrolled in KinderCare, responding with something to the effect of, “Oh, is that the fancy daycare where they let you watch your kid on a hidden camera anytime you want by logging onto their website?”
I find that concept laughable.
That I would pay [x amount] of our income for strangers to care for our child from 7:45 AM to 5: 05 PM every weekday, yet not trust them enough to do so unsupervised, but instead Big Brother style, all day by my wife and me; as we check every 30 seconds on a website to make sure our son is okay.
So, no… my son’s daycare does not have a website where I can watch him on a hidden camera all day; in case I had any doubt that the daycare workers are mistreating and abusing him as seen on some 20/20 or Dateline episode a few years ago.
Whether I want to or not, I have to trust my son with random strangers.
In fact, I had to today. Though wife and I love our megachurch we’ve both been attending for over five years now, over the past couple of months we realized that the check-in process for our son to get into the daycare was so elaborate and detailed, with printed badges and passwords, not to mention the 25 minute drive from our house, that we were willing to try a closer and smaller church that is more practical for us now that we are parents.
One where the childcare program was so simple that there was no paperwork nor name tags nor computers. One where if there was some kind of emergency during the service, someone could just walk around the corner and let us know.
So today, we “tried out” a new church, leaving Jack with random strangers in the church’s toddler room. When we picked him back up an hour later, he was totally chilled and relaxed, eating Cheddar goldfish with random strangers his age. He was fine and the random strangers taking care of him were very kind to him.
Random strangers are random strangers until you get to know them and realize you can definitely trust them; that’s the irony.
Image: Woman with a fun expression wearing a purple hat, via Shutterstock.
How to Marry Your Best Friend (May Require Starbucks)
February 5, 2012 at 12:12 am , by Nick Shell
14 months.
It was five years ago today that my wife and I went on our first date. Even if she didn’t realize it at the time.
The picture you are seeing now was taken back in March 2007; about a month after our first date… already so much in love.
But how did it all begin?
Jill Tuttle was the only one of my friends who wanted to go with me to see John Mayer in concert two hours away in Huntsville, Alabama.
This was convenient for me because I had a huge crush on her for the past four months, since meeting her at a CMT taping of the show, Crossroads.
I had been deliberately nurturing an authentic friendship with her by initiating a Sunday night tradition of meeting at Starbucks to “catch up.” We had both talked about our mutual love for John Mayer’s music. I knew that her favorite song of his was “Back To You.”
So I made the most of this concert opportunity. This was my chance.
I knew she liked Lenny’s Subs and Twizzlers. So that’s the dinner I packed in a picnic basket for us; we dined in my Honda Element in the parking lot before the show.
When we got back to Nashville around midnight, I put the car in park, looked her right in the eyes, and told her straightforwardly:
“Conveniently, next week is Valentine’s Day. And I really, really like you. I would like to take you out for Valentine’s.”
And the rest is history. We married about a year and half later; then about two and half years after that, our son Jack was born.
That’s the story of us. You could say it all started with us both responding to an email about participating in the taping of a TV show for CMT, as audience members. Or that it all actually started at Starbucks. Or the John Mayer concert. Or even Valentine’s Day 2007.
But ultimately, it started with me taking the initiative to pursue her, carefully and patiently. I wanted to marry my best friend. So I did.
Now I look around the room and see pictures featuring the memories of the mutually shared past five years of our lives, along with a corner of our living room filled with the noisy plastic toys of a blonde haired, blue eyed little boy known to many as “Jack-Man.”
Sure, I believe God orchestrated it all. He caused our paths to cross.
Yet still, when I survey my life of Jill and Jack, I can’t help but think, “Man, I made this happen. I convinced this girl to fall in love with me five years ago. Now we not only have a life together but also a son whom we love like crazy.”
I forever changed Jill Tuttle’s life. I just couldn’t leave her alone. I pursued her and won over her heart.
Of course, it will be an ongoing process. I’m not finished falling in love with her and I never will be.
4 Steps on How To Write Your Wife’s Valentine Card
February 4, 2012 at 12:15 am , by Nick Shell
14 months.
I believe that most men are wired to appreciate and use formulas to get the job done. That’s definitely the case for me. I just want someone to spell it out for me so I always know what to do the next time I’m in that situation again. I hate having to guess.
Therefore, I will attempt to share my formula for writing a thoughtful and sincere Valentine’s Day card for your wife and the mother of your children.
This year, instead of rushing by the drug store the day before and scribbling in the card “I love you” while sitting at the red light, you can be prepared ahead of time.
You can even have her card purchased and filled out a week ahead of time. Nice plan, huh? Let’s do it.
1. Make it quirky. No matter how serious or funny the card itself is supposed to be, I always like to personalize the card. Like if on the front there are two cartoon cats who are in love, I write in “you” and “me” with arrows pointing to the appropriate characters.
No matter what the writing inside the card says when you buy it, you can always add to it, inserting a line with a specific example of something she did or said that was special and memorable.
2. Use the phrase “in love with you.” It’s a given that you will tell her in the card that you love her. But by proclaiming that you are in love with her, it resurfaces those feelings and memories of when you first fell in love with her and it shows her that you never stopped falling in love with her.
Just be sure you don’t say, “I’m still in love with you.” The word “still” makes the whole thing go south pretty quickly.
3. Use her name at least once. It’s so easy to get in the habit of calling her pet names or even simply nothing at all that you end up not calling her by her name. But there’s a lot of power in saying and/or writing a person’s name. So say her name, say her name.
4. Mention your appreciation of her motherly skills. We all know that parenting is a thankless job. So thank her for how good she is at it. And if your kid is too young to talk yet like mine is, add a little note from your child- pretending to speak for them.
Okay, the card is purchased and written. Now figure out where to display it on that fateful Tuesday morning. Maybe on the bathroom sink? Let it be one of the first things she notices, to help start Valentine’s Day out the right way.
One more thing, save this article in your “Favorites.” You may need to use this card-writing formula in the near future: her birthday, Mother’s Day, Christmas, Arbor Day…
Image: Valentine heart candy, via Shutterstock.
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