Storytelling

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Making Room For Dessert… Literally!

August 10, 2013 at 2:56 pm , by 

2 years, 8 months.

Dear Jack,

Mommy made some more awesome vegan chocolate cupcakesthis weekend, from that recipe on the blog Oh She Glows. She had told you that you could have one after lunch today.

However, you hadn’t eaten much of your quesadilla before you were asking for your cupcake.

“I’m full. I want my cupcake. I want tohold it,” you told us.

(I like the fact that you were somewhat implying that you just wanted to hold the cupcake, not eat it.)

Mommy and I explained to you that if you were too full to eat the rest of your actual lunch, then you were definitely too full for a treat.

You’re a clever kid. Let me just say that.

“Uggghhhrrrrrr…Rhhggggrrr…”.

We heard you grunting and straining. We were confused as to what you were doing.

“Jack, are you trying to make room for dessert?” Mommy asked.

The sly look on your face gave it away. Yes. That’s exactly what you were trying to do!

Nicely done. It worked.

Mommy and I decided to let you have a very small bite of your cupcake before your noontime nap.

You’ll get the rest of it later.

But honestly, it was as simple as us not wanting you to strain yourself too hard. After all, Mommy had already changed a dirty diaper of yours this morning while we were at the shoe store.

So we weren’t sure that you had much more to… push out.

I’ve heard of saving room for dessert, but never making room for dessert.

Well, at least not until today.

 

Love,

Daddy

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To Be More Like Clark Griswold On Our Family Vacations

August 8, 2013 at 12:57 am , by 

2 years, 8 months.

Dear Jack,

Last week when I wrote “My Kid Doesn’t Easily Sleep In The Same Room As Me,” in reference to our recent family vacation, I ended by saying, “I just had to ask myself, ‘What would Clark Griswold do?’”

I think that’s a point worth elaborating on.

There is a lot of behavior of the fictional character, first introduced in the 1983 movieNational Lampoon’s Vacation, that I do not wish to replicate.

However, he does possess a quality I very much admire. It’s the fact that, with pride as a husband and father, he ultimately remains optimistic and adventurous on family vacations.

Yeah, that’s not necessarily me right now… but I’m working on it.

I’ve said it before, it’s hard for me to not be in control. It’s how I’m wired.

But on a family vacation, so little is in my control, especially when it comes to your sleeping arrangements. And if you don’t sleep well, I don’t sleep well. Then we’re both really grouchy the next day!

This may sound “out there,” but I have recently started practicing the art of meditation. It’s actually been very helpful to me.

I’ve learned to focus on what I can control versus what I can’t.

Turns out, my attitude and my perception of reality are what I can control the most.

And now, I’m applying my meditation principles in everyday life; not just on family vacations.

I find a quiet moment and place at some point each day and “focus on nothing,” clearing my head of un-dealt with concerns.

Then I pray for wisdom, humility, and grace.

In the process, I realize so much of what I let bother me is actually rooted in fear. It’s ultimately fear that I won’t get to relax and have a peace of mind. It’s fear that I won’t get my way or be happy… or get a break.

But if I accept that a family vacation is not a true vacation, but instead, a concentrated effort to spend time with family without the distraction of work and school, then it’s easier for me to have the right mindset.

It’s not about me. It’s not about me. It’s not about me.

Honestly, this mantra has efficiently helped my attitude as a parent.

I also try to remember this quote attributed to Jim Henson:

“The attitude you have as a parent is what your kids will learn from more than what you tell them. They don’t remember what you try to teach them. They remember what you are.”

This reminds me of an article I read recently about Shawn Achor, known as “Dolphin Dad,” who promotes the idea that kids learn to focus and react the way their parents teach them; including the frequency of laughter and smiling that takes place in a household, as modeled by the parents.

He believes the attributes of successful parenting are demonstrated in dolphins; because they are playful, social, and intelligent. In essence, happier parents make happier kids.

For me, at least, I can’t be happy, especially on a family vacation, if I’m focused on what will make me happy.

I have to think the opposite: What will make everyone else happy? What will it take to lose my ego and therefore lose what limits me? How can I sacrifice to make this trip memorable for everyone, instead of one we will all later wish we could forget?

Plus, I have to remind myself of the words of Clark Griswold: “This is no longer a vacation. It’s a quest. It’s a quest for fun. You’re gonna have fun, and I’m gonna have fun.”

We’ll be taking a mini family vacation in October. I think I’m actually ready for the challenge now…

 

Love,

Daddy

 

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Camouflage Goes With Everything, Even Dog Bone Socks

August 7, 2013 at 10:59 pm , by 

2 years, 8 months.

Dear Jack,

Ever since last week when you decided to pack your “camel shoes just in case” inside your backpack, you have found a new appreciation for your camel shoes.

So much, that now, you are actually wearing them to school… everyday.

(Just to review, you say “camel” instead of “camouflage.”)

Today Mommy picked out one of my favorite shirts for you, with plaid shorts, and your striped socks with dog bones on them.

However, she didn’t intend for camouflage shoes to be part of that ensemble.

When it came time for me to get you out the door this morning, and you wanted to wear them, I put up no fight.

It honestly didn’t bother me. The way I figure, you’re really going to laugh one day when you see these pictures.

And hey, I’m not knocking your style.

In fact, you were pretty patriotic and American-looking today, with your red-white-and-blue theme, your American classic car on your shirt, and your camouflage shoes.

Just like Brad Paisley’s song “Camouflage” points out, camouflage goes with everything. Especially red, white, and blue.

I sort of envy the fact you get to dress like this and get away with it.

Granted, people in my office barely raise an eyebrow anymore or have any creative comments left when I wear my hot pink Polo pants to work. Still though, I had to establish a reputation as “the guy who can get away with dressing like 1985.”

However, you’re a kid. You’re a cute little boy who can totally rock some striped dog bone socks with camouflage shoes.

You don’t have to establish a reputation that, in essence, earns you the right to dress however you want.

That’s pretty awesome, actually.

 

Love,

Daddy

 

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A Southern Fried, Sunday Afternoon Play Date

August 6, 2013 at 11:00 pm , by 

2 years, 8 months.

Dear Jack,

After testing out the adventure of taking you to the races at the Nashville Fairgrounds Speedway with us, we decided to invite your best friend Sophie and her parents along for the next race.

It was interesting because I could tell Sophie enjoyed watching the races just as much as you did, but in a slightly different way:

She is a highly verbal extrovert. You are a highly verbal introvert.

Sophie wanted to talk to you and share snacks.

You wanted to eat your own snacks and watch the race; as the “grumpy old man” look on your face in this picture clearly demonstrates.

I was actually surprised you let Sophie wear your skull and crossbones sunglasses… or as you call them, your robot glasses.

Basically, if it meant she didn’t get to eat your food, you were willing to sacrifice the shades.

It was funny when I asked Sophie’s mommy how she liked the races as we were leaving, because her response perfectly reflected my own: “That was different… but I had a good time.”

I must say that being at the races this weekend reminded me how truly Southern living in Nashville can be sometimes… or at least I should say, in some places in Nashville.

The races began with a prayer, which is fine by me. However, the prayer devolved quickly:

“Dear Lord, we thank you that we can all be here at the races today. We just ask that you will keep all these drivers safe today…”

So far so good. But then…

“And Lord, we pray that you will help these cars go faster than they ever have before, so that all the fans here today will be entertained like they never have before…”

{Insert record scratching sound effect here to imply a surprise in the story flow, like they do in cliche movie trailers.}

“And I just pray, oh Lord, that for all the people who decided to stay home today instead of coming out here to the races, that the next time they decide to not come to the races, you would make them feel bad and realize just what they’re missing by not being here with us today.”

That was the point where I stopped taking the prayer seriously, and started looking around, catching eye contact with Sophie’s parents, as to say, “This must be a joke, right?”

Nonetheless, the man ended his “prayer” like this, I kid you not:

“And I pray all this in Jesus’ name, boogity-boogity… AMEN!”

I felt like I needed to ask God for forgiveness simply just for being present for that.

(It actually reminded me of one of my favorite bands, Cake, with their 1998 song, “Satan Is My Motor”; which I interpret as a song about the dichotomy of impure motives versus good intentions.)

Perhaps the most confusing part of the opening prayer was the fact he prayed that the next time people decided to stay home, that God would essentially curse them, but not this time.

Sophie and her parents stayed about an hour after we left, which was at the end of the third race. I learned from Sophie’s mommy, that in the fourth race, two of the cars bumped into each other and the drivers got out of their cars to start fighting each other.

Fortunately, the drivers’ pit crews held them back from actually hitting each other in the face.

I think next time, the opening prayer needs to cover that too.

 

Love,

Daddy

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“I Pack My Camel Shoes, Just In Case”: Okiedog Backpack Review

August 6, 2013 at 9:08 pm , by 

2 years, 8 months.

Dear Jack,

The brown UPS truck drives past our house every day at 6:03 PM. You always like to assume, “He brings a gift… for me?”

Well, last Thursday just happened to be your lucky day. He brought you your new backpack for the new school season.

You chose a panda bear, as part of the “Wildpack” series of Okiedog; the same brand where we found my “daddy diaper bag” four months ago. As the picture above makes clear, you were definitely excited about your new backpack.

Not to mention, you were very eager to try it out. So eager, in fact, that we decided to go on a family walk, immediately.

Before we could leave, you decided you needed to pack it with something first. Without hesitation, you turned to the hutch where we keep our shoes:

“I pack my camel shoes… just in case.”

It was so funny, and totally caught me off guard at the time, that I couldn’t process your statement quickly enough to laugh:

By “camel shoes,” you were referring to yourcamouflage shoes.

As to why you might suddenly need camouflage shoes during a 10 minute walk in our neighborhood, I’m still unsure.

Either way, you wanted to be prepared.

So we made our journey down the sidewalk, with your “camel shoes” in your new backpack.

You were so proud to display your new “gift from the brown truck” that you didn’t realize your pants had fallen down, and yet, you continued walking.

After Mommy pulled your pants up, you decided to start collecting rocks for your existing collection, which we keep at our front door.

Even though you could have easily stored your rocks in your backpack with your camel shoes, you chose to hold them in your left hand, since you were already clenching your elephant with your right.

Granted, that made it difficult to keep collecting new rocks.

It goes without saying, you made sure you wore your backpack to school the next day, simply if nothing else, for the reason of showing it off to your friends…

And actually, they asked me where you got it; the style of it is very unique in the midst to most other kids’ backpacks.

It reminds me of the kind of thing I saw back 10 years ago when I taught English in Bangkok, Thailand.

I’m happy the brown truck brought a gift for you… even if you still haven’t come across an emergency were you suddenly needed your camel shoes!

 

Love,

Daddy