June 11, 2014 at 8:30 pm , by Nick Shell

3 years, 6 months.

Dear Jack,

Yesterday on my business road trip from Franklin, TN to Murray, KY, I was a passenger for a total round trip of over 5 hours.

Seriously, I was in culture shock.

Please understand why…

Since you were born 3 and a half years ago, I have been driving you to and from school every single day. On the weekends, I drive the both you and Mommy around.

For all our road trips, to Louisville, KY, to Atlanta, GA, to my hometown in Fort Payne, AL, it’s me that’s driving; I’m never the passenger.

It’s even rare for me to be driving in a car by myself. There’s always someone for me to entertain and/or take care of.

So for me to be a passenger for over 5 hours yesterday, just sitting in the back seat… man, it was weird!

I read for a little while, I texted Mommy, I texted my friend Jarred, I took a little nap; but ultimately, the experience somehow made me feel lazy- like I was evading my role.

It’s just that I am wired to be the driver, the navigator, the one who is ultimately in charge.

I am wired for responsibility. But as a passenger in a vehicle, it felt sort of wrong; like how in my letter to you yesterday I explained that it felt wrong not seeing you all day long.

This morning, I drove you to school as usual. It was as if everything were back to normal.

I answered your questions about why dark clouds mean it’s probably going to rain and explained how the sun dries up the rain once the sun comes back out again.

As I drove you, I taught you. That’s what I do. That’s part of the dynamics of our father-son relationship.

What I don’t do is just watch the telephone poles go by as a classic 90s hit comes on the radio.

We can drive it home, with one headlight…

 

Love,

Daddy